Jan 15, 2009
I have to say, last night was one of the best sleeps I've had in ages. I still had the regular hot and cold issues, but for the most part, I think I slept really pretty well. Maybe it was the large amount of Valerian and Tylenol PM (enough to take down a small horse I'm sure), but it was much needed. I think one of the most frustrating parts of the withdrawals is the lack of sleep. Lack of sleep in turn leads to really bad days. At least for me.
I feel far better today than I have in any of the other mornings since my taper and then finally my last few clean days. Again, I think it was the quality of sleep. It still seems so strange to me to wake up in the morning and not have the pain I had when I was taking the tram. The pain that would lead me to take more and more of it! How many years I've wasted on this stupid cycle when all along (not knowing) that it was the tram that was keeping me down.
Last night the main issue before bed was the tingling in my lower legs and feet. I did the usual Hyland's Restless Legs, Aleve, and then rubbed them down with Ben Gay. It all seems like so much to do when in the past all I did was pop a few more trams to get by. I'm okay with it now! The ritual of just trying to get settled in for the night. It's all so much better than it was when I was on the stupid pills!
Today I'm taking things slower than yesterday. There shall be no slaying of any huge dragons today (aka going to Walmart for groceries) Hee-hee! I can laugh about it now that I'm feeling better, but yesterday was a true test of how I might handle such a situation. It wasn't good, it was ugly, I thought I might die, but here I am today! I'm ALIVE!!!!