Jan 08, 2013
Well, I am writing this for two reasons......to let everyone know and to convince me! My daddy and I are so close. A true daddy's girl. Mama too for that matter. My whole family is close as can be. This has been a stunner! I don't know why anything ever is to me, but this one smacked me with reality........right in focus! My parents are proud of me for what I have overcome, and I won't let them down over this. I'm not sleeping much, even when I can leave the hospital, because I'm finding that that's almost worse than being there. NOT being there leaves too many constant questions for me......"Is he ok? Is mom ok? Will they let me know if they aren't? Will I get that call like I got Friday? Oh Lord, I'm gonna get the call? Is the phone on? Maybe the ringer isn't turned up? Maybe I better check? Is the alarm on? What if I over sleep? Oh, gosh, I better just stay awake!" That kind of thing. It's easier to stay. The hospital daddy is in is 2 hours away. They live right next door to my house. This is devastating......
I just want him to come home.....or do I? Maybe that will scare me more? We don't live close to a decent hospital. Any "sick" person has to be flown out. Amazing little town with a great school. I grew up here. That's a downfall of it though. I think he will be ok. I just want him back next door to me. I sure hope he knows how MUCH I love him. I'm not ready to let him leave me yet. God watched over us Friday. My daddy is a good man. Good father. Good husband. Good friend. And he has a lot of faith. I think that's paid off!
He's one of my best friends. He's saved my life more than once, and I need him!!! He's helped me so much in my life, so I owe him some sleepless nights! This is sure gonna be one!!
Thank you all for the messages and notes and kind words and living through this aimless rambling! I'll be ok!!!