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Father taking away SON from Mother

Mar 16, 2009 - 8 comments

Okay so this is my friends situation.

Which I think is ridiculous and horrible for the child!

My friend has a boy who is 6 months old now! She was living with the father who is 30 and still living at home! She had a place of her own before she has her baby, but because she lost her job and the father didn't want to move there for whatever reason she had no choice but to go there.
The house is the dirtiest place ever! She then finally had enough in January and tried leaving! She went to a shelter then that had a fire (no one was harmed) so she went back! Then after she went and stayed at a friends but this guy thought he could "get some" from her so she left, I don't know why she didn't ask me if she could stay at my house, probably because she didn't want to ask too much and I had a baby of my own.

So this is the scoop, he didn't treat her very good at the beginning and all through out anyways, he didn't give her money to do anything. He would change his mind all the time about the relationship, first he would treat her like a bag of dirt than others he would act like the sweetest person in the world.
I do think she may have pushed thinks a little bit too much because when she did leave and he didn't answer her phone calls she just kept insisting....not for her sake but for her sons........I can understand but I don't think she should have bugged him so much. His parents are fat and dirty and they will agree on anything when it comes to the father having there son!
When she lived there she would try and clean and they would tell her not too!! Its pathetic..........

Now just yesturday she was downstairs doing her own thing taking care of her son and all of a sudden the police were there!!
The father called the police saying he wanted her to leave and she could not take her son with her. 1st she was breastfeeding, and the father lied and said she wasn't and they believed him!! And then they called children aid because the place is a dirt ball (she stays in the basement and she tries her hardest to keep that clean for her sons sake and try as hard as possible to not go to any other parts of the house)!!
I feel for her, because he is being so disrespectful and honestly he is not a good person and he does not deserve his son!
He needs his mother....the bond you get when you breastfeed is nothing you could imagine unless you experienced it yourself, and I was crying for her.
It is terrible........when she told the cops she could go to a shelter they were like that isn't a good place for your son!! Well it is better than that place....and all she thought is that they opened up there home for her and there son to be safe and okay!!

Now today she went for emergency custody and the judge wouldn't grant it all because of the fathers WORDS saying she is a threat to her self!!! He doesn't even have custody!!

Like this is terrible!! OMG, I know her!!!! She has never been that way nor would ever do such a thing to there son!!!

Now her boobs are hurting like you cant believe unless you know!! And all of a sudden switching to fomula I don't think is good at all!!

She told me when she went to pick up her stuff her son was crying and they weren't doing anything, and then she asked if they gave him the medication they have for him and hes like NO!!

Why is this happening, I don't understand it isn't far.....its funny when someone is already in a shelter it is okay because they do get help and then eventually get on there feet and get on assistance until they can get a job (here in Ontario) but why!!! If they say that because she isn't working and wouldn't have any income without the father, so what she has to stay with the father, put up with the mental abuse, put up with all of his **** all because he has the doesn't make seance, even though the help is there if she could of left with him....

Why is this happening, honestly someone needs to do something about it.....and I feel like and *** kicking or worse....that is how angry this makes breaks my heart

And oh today also they said to her (the father and his parents) they don't need her and her SON doesn't need her!!

He will not let her see her son :'(

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by AnnieBrooke, Mar 17, 2009
She is not powerless in this situation.  She is the mother of the child.  She needs a lawyer, NOW.  If she has no money, she needs to go to Legal Aid or other services like that for low income or no income clients.  If she can't find any, she should call the nearest law school and find out where such services are.  Urge her to act fast.  She should never be in front of a judge without a lawyer.

Avatar universal
by JillD75, Mar 17, 2009

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by mami1323, Mar 17, 2009
This sounds so strange.  Most judges will never take away a child from it's mother without clear cut evidence that the child is being harmed.  There are abusive mothers out there that have a social worker come to the house a million times and still never get the child out of the house.  They usually conduct an investigation first and go to the home.  If she kept the basement clean then they would go to the area where the child stays at and look.  It's his house not hers and it seems strange that they would allow the baby to stay with the father in that disgusting home.  She has no one else that she could stay with?  If I were her I would report that judge.  

Avatar universal
by sahrina030, Apr 06, 2009
This is happening EVERY WHERE NOW! Mothers are getting there BABIES ripped right out of there arms!!!!!!!!!!  I too am in a situation where i was living in Upstate NY for a while . I had a little boy who is now 4 in Syracuse NY. The father an I were together for 5 years. After I had our son he started cheating and became more violent. All my family lives in Florida. I finally left my son's father 2 years ago and tried my hardest to get by and be a single mother and stay in NY . Finally, I begged the father if I could move home to my parents in Florida to have a "FRESH START"I promised to give him tons of visitation (Summers, Holidays , and any month he would want to come down). He replied by saying NO and by taking me to court for custody even though we already had an agreement that I would have Primary Physical Custody. He made lies in Court thus far. And Guess what.......Syracuse/Oneida Judges seem to listen to the Lie's and believe a Physical and Mental Abuser....for now....we have trial on May 14th, 2009 and I pray every night the Judge will see through his LIES and do the right thing .......There is so so much more to my situation . If I were to type it all it would take days! I just wanted you to know that all around this country This type of thing is happening to MoM's ! It is just UN-NATRUAL and I am truely starting to believe that the end is Near....I will Pray for your friend! I also just started a MYSPACE PAGE....StandUp4Mothers........Mothers need to open there eyes

Avatar universal
by jessie2824, Apr 15, 2009
I am going through a simular situation..My daughter is 4 years old..Her father and I were together for almost 4 years..I left him when my daughter was 2 due to emotional abuse..I went to court for custody.He never showed up or contested..I have full physical custody with visitation as i see fit...I settled child support out of court because I felt bullied by him and didnt want to fight with him..So I asked for an increase (the total he was paying was 400.00 less than if we went to court)..He agreed and payed it for approx 6 months then decided that he wasnt going to pay the amount we agreed on...He is also leaving in August for 4months for military training and is a ny state co..He also has cancelled visiations, given me a hard time with everything, basically made life hard..He told me if i go to court for child support he would take me to court for custody...I called his bluff..I have a court date for child support..Dont have a date for custody yet..I have seen a lawyer but its going to cost me more than i can afford for his services but was told not to show up without a lawyer for custody..I am stuck..I have been employed for 9 years with the same company i dont make alot of money but make too much for legal aide. i dont drink,do drugs..if im not working im with my daughter..she is my world..any advice is really appreciated...I dont want to loose her..

Avatar universal
by darkone40, Mar 11, 2010
the supposed mother of my child is with a sex offender but the child is not born yet do i have legal right to take the child away when it is born

Avatar universal
by Baby_Girl_01_03, Mar 17, 2010
Well I am in a situation also. I have a son who will be four next month. My son's father has never exercised visitation rights or had any kind of bond with the child. Now he is almost $2,500 behind in support and all of a sudden after these four years files for full custody. I have court tomorrow. I am living in a two bedroom motel with my husband my son and my daughter. My husband and myself both work here. Now the father wants to step in and say that he can offer my son a stable loving family where no drugs and alcohol are involved, that he can give my son his own room,put him in school and feed him home cooked meals. Thats all he is tryin to use against me. Do I need to worry? I called children services myself and let them know my whereabouts and they said I was fine,that they had had no concerns with where I live. Legal aid won't take the case but they said I have no worries. I'm just scared because you never know what will happen. Someone please tell me that everything will be okay. As far of those of you that have had your babies taken FIGHT to get them back. pray to God that he brings or sends them bak to you. I know what its like to lose children. I wish you all the best. May God bless you all.

Avatar universal
by shantel228, Jan 18, 2011
OMG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My daughter is 4years old too. I was 38 when I had her, I saw early signs of a stalker and a abuser./Mental as well.  I kept hoping for marriage. When I was in the hospital I had a C sec. and I was really unable to walk.  When it was time to sign papers, he said NO for my last name to be on it.  In the hospial I did nothing but cry. He has all the money and a large family, which I got funny vibs from too, but still did not worry a bout them.  I wanted my babys name to be Lauren instead of Michaela, He sad NO to that.  As you can tell already he was very controlling. In other words I wish I thought differently now. I began to fail in my jobs and started major Depression.  Taking to much of prescribed Drugs.  And Drinking. I took the baby and spent the night over a friends house, called an attorney.  Come to find out I had the ball in my court.  Well, I was still hoping for love. And was in denial that he is not loving me at all. More abuse came in with bruses and mental state.  HE now has full cusody. I have 0 $ for even a point attorn.  My case has been going on for 3yrs.  And I am missing out on everything. I did get help, for drinking and pre-drugs.  I feel better and not to mention, I went through 4 attorneys. I need help.  My greiving state is still happing now.  I just lost her in Oct.2010.  And now I am re-building my life.  May God, Please let this short story get out, to the right person.  I WANT MY BABY BACK.  Kevin wont take my phone calls or e-mails. Her School has been notified I'm not allowed to even say hi or pick her up.  I'm guessing this is going on because he has money and family that spy's on me.  I want to be free.

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