All Journal Entries Journals

Just thinking

May 12, 2013 - 3 comments

Just sitting here in my own head thinking. While everyone else in the house is sleeping.  Ahhhhh

I have to believe my mentors and all those who have paved the way for me that this does get easier.  That each time you resist a temptation to take a pill.  It will get easier.  I'm counting on that!!!  Please God let this be true.

I want to try to keep myslef focused on the postive and keep moving forward in my journey.  I want to be a good mom, good wife, good daughter, good sister, good friend, I want to help those in need, good hygienist and have a good relationship w all my staff and patients.

I want to keep being clean in the front of my mind so I can be successful and stay clean.

I have so much to be thankful for.  Feel very blessed   Just never want to let my guard down.  I never want to go down that road of taking a pill ev day again!!   I won't do it!!  It disgusts me.

Rambling on. Lol. Goodnight

Post a Comment
4810126 tn?1503946335
by EvolverU, May 12, 2013
You go girl! You must put your own sobriety first before anything else, otherwise you won't any good to yourself or to those around you. Treat yourself well on this, your (doubly) special day! You deserve it. You're stronger than you know.

4522800 tn?1470329434
by VICourageous, May 12, 2013
Hey Chris..This is all part of the disease..We all have the cravings now and then..I have been using for over 40 years for one reason or another and I never looked at it as being wrong or right..It does s**k and it is hard..But as time goes on I do see the rewards that God will give us when we give our life back to him.I am proud when someone young comes along and realizes this and stays clean from all substances..They have there whole future a head of them..It does scare the crap out of me at a older age..You know we have talked about it..What if this happens or that happens to us..I just know how easy the surges of those Dopamines can play the I feel good tape over again and the way we go..So we have to keep praying for us ALL..and do not give in..It does make it very difficult when they are in the house or even around some where..I have to re-direct myself every time that brain fires up and thinks about them..Keep it up girl & I will too!!! OK lol

4614494 tn?1368359985
by SmilingBright, May 12, 2013
Hey Annie and Vic!! Thank u both very much.
Yes I've been ee directing Alot here lately.  60 days down and a lifetime to go!!

Can't wait to wkout tmrw!!!!   I need the endorohins badly!!!!!!  

Post a Comment