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Day 8

May 31, 2009 - 4 comments

Its just hit 1:15am Monday morning as im in australia...im finding it hard after not using for 8 short days i cant sleep. Im up until 3 or 4am most mornings, I only sleep about 4 hours a night, Cravings are killing me, but in the long run its better to stop while im young and enjoy the rest of my life, altho the years on drugs did have some very good times it also had some major lows and lost alot of friends when i started using. My life is slowly coming back together after 4 years im thinking of my future and not waking up thinking where im going to get the money from to waist on something i dont really need. Im getting respect back for my parents, my mum had been great, altho she doesnt know the full amount i was using as i didn't want to worry her anymore than i had, she put me through rehab once and has been very understanding.
The last few says have been hell, ive been trying to get out for walking and running in the mornings, but the weather has been so bad hear i cant go out...so im stuck inside as i have no job, but im going for interviews all week.
Ive found that music has helped me a great deal, lets my mind rest and not think much, headaches are a killer as i dont want to take anything fearing that i ll get stuck on them too.
But im just taking one day at a time and im pretty happy so far.

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by Prospero73, May 31, 2009
Melissa, your post could have been written by my son.  If he had had a forum like this to write to, it might have made all the difference to him.  He fought the good fight against methadone for years.  You say that music has helped you: some of his songs are on his MySpace page:

http://www.myspace.com/tomfishmusic


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by gizzy32, May 31, 2009
You are on the right track now Melissa. Ahhhhhhh to be 19 again:) Coke and E really mess up the receptors for awhile, but we do heal and day by day find ourselves again. The cravings are so tough at first, but with the right tools and some clean time, they get a lot easier and don't happen as much. One of the biggest things I have learned is how to not let those cravings turn into full blown coke mode because then I am in trouble. Recognizing the change in thought patterns early and seeking support and talking about the craving helps immensly, but if we hide it, then it will get worse most times, it did for me anyway.

I am proud of you for fighting this and even though it's hell at times, you are already seeing signs of improvement. Your family can already see the changes and it will just keep getting better. Keep reading and posting, I learned so much here. Congrats on 8 days.

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by BARBIE123841, May 31, 2009
GIRL HANG IN THEIR! ITS HARD, THEY WANT ME ON METHADONE BUT I REFUSE I HAD A HARD ENOUGH TIME WILL PERKS! YOUR DOING GOOD!

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by melissa845, May 31, 2009
Thanks, I listened to that music on your sons myspace, Its really good :)
I didn't sleep at all last night, Is there anything i can do other than taking pills, Or should i just wait it out, I feel like i have slept for hours tho, I guess that my body must be pretty messed up after everything, So its just going to take time...

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