behavior problems with my 3 and 1/2 year old

[staceymj]

My 3.5 year old switched to a new preschool 4 months ago.  Since he has started the new school we have had several incidents. The second week of school he hit his teacher and since then he has hit her and other children 7-10 times.  The school has concerns because the say that he is extremely bright and a large vocabulary but they notice impulse control issues, hyperactivity(running or moving around the room a lot more that other children in his class) not listening to the teacher and no fear of authority.  When he is sent to the preschool directors office for hitting the teacher they sit him down and ask him why he hit her and he says" because I wanted to" they say well that is not how we treat people and emphasize respecting people and not using our hands. He will shrug his shoulders or put his hand on his hips and say"I don't care or I don't like you" They had a psychologist come in for a teacher meeting and invited me to sit in a listen to him speak.  He described my son when speaking about ADHD but said at this age he was really to young to say that he may have adhd.  About a month ago I contacted a psychologist and had her observe him in school and she said that he is hyper and does have impulse control problems She feels that she can give me some tools.  The problem is the holidays her vacation and now she has had surgery and is returning phone calls next week.  I feel desperate because monday, Tuesday and today he was sent home early for hitting his teacher.  The school does not believe in time out ,they redirect.  I feel that  my son is not getting diciplined for his behavior and he knows that he can get away with it and now knows what he needs to do to come home and spend the day with me.  He is only 3 I can not punish him all day for this behavior. The psychologist told the teacher that sending him home was not the right way to deal with the behavior but that is there policy.  The director was away when the psychologist spoke with the teacher and feels that going home is the right decision.  If they are not willing to use the suggestions given by the dr they recommended I may pull him out. I feel that my son has adhd and that he is to young to diagnose or treat with meds.  Is there anything I can give him that is all natural or things I can do at home to help with this behavior? I was never told of any problems at the other school could he be worse at the new school because he knows  there is no consequence.  We use time out at home.

[staceymj]

He is aloud to return. they are trying to let him hit a pillow when he is angry and actually had a excellent day on friday.  But they said that they will give it a week and if the hitting continues he will be sent home every time it happens. We will see about monday.  I spoke to the last preschool and they said that they would take him back if I was interested.  They had no problems with him there. I am not sure what to do.  I have begun reading a book called 1,2,3 magic(recommended by a psychologist) and I am going to try this technique, its pretty simple and makes a lot of sense.  Most of his problems are at school though and this method will not work there unless they are using it. No he is not in head start.  What exactly is it?

[momagain59]

Is your child by any chance in Head Start?

Can he return to the other preschool?