6yr old meds or no meds

[stressed_out_mom]

I need advice from people that have been where I am. I have a wonderful 6 yr old daughter with Adhd. I have never given her any meds just always watched her diet and kept on schedule. She has started kindergarden this year and having so many problems. Homework we can do it takes forever but we get it done and she understands all of it but when she gets to school its like  she forgets it all we have reading all week and she reads it herself but when she gets to school she can't read the first word. Her teacher isn't much help either. All the kids in the class gets only one chance before getting a sad face sent home. So another words we haven't had one good face she always talks or gets out of place at least once a day. I have ask her teacher to move her to a seat by herself but was told my daughter had to learn to work with other children beside her. My daughter is so smart but doesn't want to show it. When I ask her she says she forgot everything we learned. I am open to any suggestions.
I am so stressed I don't want to do meds but I also don't want her to miss out on her education, or life. She is a wonderful child other than her Adhd I just wonder how much longer I can go on without meds. She's always in trouble at school and home. PLEASE TELL ME SOMEONE ELSE HAS WENT THROUGH THIS

[Cyn2008]

Please don't feel bad if your child needs to be put on meds.  I dragged my feet with meds and my son.  One day I was watching him and just felt so sorry for him.  He was 7 and couldn't make friends, do homework, watch a movie or even sit still to focus on a book he wanted to read.  He was so agressive and started eventually saying things like "I hate myself"  "Im stupid"  "Im a bad person".  I got him in and found out that he was extreme ADHD and bipolar. I had to put myself aside and my feelings about meds and understand the hell that he was going through.  I cant imagine how it would feel for my mind to go a thousand miles an hour and be given tasks. That has to be torture.  Anyway,  do what is best for YOUR child.  Many people gave guilt trips about meds but at the same time they didn't want my child around.  Including grandparents.  I got him on medication and he is so calm and mellow.  (NOT SEDATED).  Until you have gone through this and watched your child go through the hell of this condition, no one should give advice.  Best wishes!!!  Nothing is better than seeing your childs confidence grow and gain self esteem.  
Cyndy

[dyblue]

  My son is in grade one and doing very well since he started ridilin, he is on top of it and can now pay attention in school.  Very important for their self esteem, before this I heard nothing but complaints about his behavior on a daily basis in preschool and I thought this can't go on.  Hewas diagnosed ADHD fits him to a tee and the meds wear off but I can deal with his behavior but teachers can't with all those other kids and they don't give kids teachers aids for ADHD.  I didn't want to do the medication thing with my son either and we can wean him off the meds maybe when he's older when he learns to control himself ie The frontal lobe of the brain is not developed in a six year old heck some adults for that matter.  Just try the meds you'll be amazed at the difference like night and day.  ADHD people are very intellegent once this disorder is managed and they relate better to other children they don't have to feel so different.

[Debers]

I have a 6yr old son that started K this yr too, and I had to put him on ADHD meds ( which I hated to do) But his teacher has seen a HUGE difference in him and so have we. He was getting hurt all the time at home, because he would Litterly bounce off the walls. But If you and teacher have talked, I would sugest giving the meds a try, were glad we did. :o)

[susji2]

YOU JUST DESCRIBED ME AS A CHILD!!!!! I never took meds. Deep brething and relaxation techniques worked well once I realized it as an adult. I am an rn now.  No meds. Maybe new teacher though.  Teacher are to encourage. My teacher put me around boys (and I was boy crazy).  Good luck

[uptownmindi]

Dear mom,
I know how you feel, my son is 8 now in 2nd grade and kinder was horrible for us. So bad he began sucking his fingers when stresses became to much, that' s when I pulled him from school and began homeschooling him. I don't recommend that either.  The first thing you need to do is get a different teacher. One that can willing to do things out side the box. We had green bears for good days and he seldom got a green bear...he didn't care about a silly green paper. A teacher that is really willing to work with you, listen and cares is a huge factor in making school work. It took me over a year to repair the damage of 6months kinder. I also had my son sit and the end of the group tables. He was still with the group but didn't have kids on each side of him to distract and be distracted. Next you have to make a different reward system. Currently we have his broken up into time periods. Morning, lunch, PE and afternoon. That way we can see where his having trouble but still can focus on the positive. Such as "yes you had issues at PE but you did great in the morning."etc. This way you can find the positive. Most ADHD kids are very smart and as we know when they have to wait for other kids to catch up they get bored then in trouble. We also do the diet thing. Our dr. said to take him off chocolate, very helpful. Lastly, I hated giving in but medicine was the best thing we could of done for all of us. We started out with 20mg of Medidate CD. After doing biofeedback or nerofeedback we have him down to 10mg now. He still has his days when he is still miserable to be around but it help does tremendously. I know how you feel about meds. It was so hard to give in, I felt like I failed in a way but really it was the best choice for the whole family. There are other natural choices, such as Attend. We use that after school. As moms we work hard to prepare them that school is something fun and wonderful before kinder, to have that outlooked ruined is so discouraging. The self esteem damage at school is much worse then the meds. It does get a little better but it will always be more of challenge then we like. I put my son in jujitsu after 3 weeks of steady write ups and he is now 4weeks with a clean card! Something else to consider. Just continue to support your little girl, find alternative measures and get those meds. ;-)

Good luck to you and your little one. Remember there is another mom closer then you think with the same issues.

Oh! Look up Dr. Becky Baily, Conscious Discipline, this is the best thing I have ever watched. We started using this and saw immediate results.

[MsJonessy]

i have  a 7 yr old every thing you have  said i am going thur with her  so i know your pain  But i am going to take her to the dr and get her tested soon   stressed_out_mom  also in nyc