It is not appropriate to diagnose a child of three years with ADD. It could be that the very drug she is being given is adding to the problem. I note particularly "insomnia." I don't know what medication she is being given, but it is usually an upper. This calms a child with ADD and revs up a child who doesn't have ADD. For the child who doesn't have it, it often causes insomnia. See another doctor.
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My son is 18 there is no harder road to walk than this one, but you have to do whatever you can to be strong, whatever helps you to stay calm and in control.
If you give a big reaction to negative behavior it increases these issues, these children push for anger and excitement. It is like a drug for them, really, did you ever see the smirk on their face before they get upset. We often train them to behave badly.
You have to learn some parenting techniques, why would you slap her? It is medically proven to increase symptoms. You need to focus on her totally when she is 'good' I would notice her at least every 10 - 20 minutes. You will then keep her on this track, any kind of notice, if she is watching TV, say "I see you like watching TV" If you tried this for one week you would see a huge improvement, notice her before she has to look for notice.
She will be yours for life ! If you do not get a handle on it when young you certainly wont when she meets you eye to eye ! Do as much research as you can.
We are given the ability to handle most things life throws at us, the only thing you musn't do is give up !
Just found a great site with a lot of very helpful techniques which I think you will find very useful. It is even better than the one by the Arizona State Supreme Court - which was I thought very good. Go to: http://helpguide.org/mental/adhd_add_parenting_strategies.htm
I am not sure how to deal with the pooping, but I know that the measures you are taking to discipline her won't work.
I highly suggest that you buy this book and read it. Fortunately, its a pretty quick read due to the listing method and great table of contents at each chapter. You can get it on Amazon fairly cheaply. I took a quick look in mine and didn't find much on pooping, but there is a ton of good stuff that will help you with other things and also as she matures. The book is, "The ADD/ ADHD Answer book," by Susan Ashley.
Pooping wise - is this happening as her medication is tapering off? Also there are a ton of posts in the child behavior forum on kids and their bowel problems that might be helpful. In fact you might post there anyway.
Oh, I just recently found a new web site that has a lot of very useful information. I will give you a good, broad background of ADHD that I think you will find helpful. And since its by the Arizona State Supreme Court, I think you can trust the information.
The site is: http://www.supreme.state.az.us/casa/prepare/adhd.html
Hope this helps.