My Experiences with Joey

[shelly405]

Hi Gang,

I have one child, 14 years old now. He was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 5. He was always smarter and more quick witted than the other children. He lost interest in things quickly - Or he couldn't stop doing something he was really interested in. He was and still is given to fits of rage, has depression and also manic euphoria.

By the time he was 6 I was worn out. I couln't stand to be around him. The most mundane tasks, like eating breakfast were a battle, every morning. The only time we weren't fighting is when he was in bed - with me. Let me back up a bit...

By 5 months old, he cried all the time, and the DR told me at 9 months that he was hyperactive. I said yeah, right! F you too, buddy. But the DR was right. The only way he wouldn't cry was for me to hold him. Eventually, I took 3 yards of cotton and began to literally tie him to me. Back to my story...

He stayed in my bed until he was 12 1/2.
I tried him on ritulin, adderal and concerta. These drugs transformed my child into a monster. But he was already a monster. He would "crash and  burn" (His term) when the meds left his system. It was like he was David Banner making the trasition to the Hulk. This would last for an hour or so, every day. Eventually, HE decided (around age 9 or 10) that he had had enough, and he REFUSED to take anything.

I had to stop hating him. That was hard, because he took my life from me. I lost many good friends as he got older because he was so disruptive. Many children didn't want to play with him because he just didn't know when to stop. It's been rough. Eventually, I decided to try to like him. See him as a person, and not my screwed up child. I got help, and things got better. He is still a bit over the top.

A little different from the other kids, but he has 4 very good friends, and they all seem to balance each other out. They just tell him to chill or they''ll kick his a** and that seems to work like nothing I could ever have done. It's still hard - Don't get me wrong. The past 14 years with this person has been hell, but I wouldn't have traded it for anything.

I see other children - normal ones, that stand in line and obey their parents and I think to myself, "Good grief, what's wrong with those kids? They are so lifeless..." I am still learning tricks to get him  on task, and hopefully will continue to do so. He knows he is different, and he tries really hard to do what he's told. And I have realized that he is not a bad child, he is just a little "off".

I hope this inspires someone, somehow. I can't say either way about drug therapy..It didn't work for us, and caused more problems than we had in the beginning. I realized the drugs were reccomended by the school so the teachers wouldn't have to deal with a "Special" child - Something they know very little about. Eventually, I learned to like the person I gave birth to. We are working it out.

Shelly.

[Russ_1]

Your testament has really hit home and I'd like to wish you the best of luck as someone who could from your description have been like a copy of your son I realise now my impact I must of had on my mother.Thank you and i really wish you well.John