i had brain surgery about 15 years ago in the front right lobe due to inter cranial hemorrhaging from a ruptured avm an. was very fortunate to walk out of the hospital unscathed. It has dawned to me over the last little bit that i am different from many in a good way. I feel as though this deformation prior and after the surgery has blessed me with a sense of seeing the world in a enlightened like insane way without the insanity. I respect that there is a lot of painful emotions within this forum but I am curious is there anyone else out there that may have seen there avm as a blessing instead of a curse?
Well, maybe, kinda, sorta, I identify with what I think You might be feeling.
I had an AVM that ruptured while I was on a PAP smear table in my doctor's office - the doctors office "happened" to be located in a HOSPITAL!! So, when my brain ruptured I was ONLY a few feet from the Emergency Room. I was immediately rushed to the ER and then air lifted to REDWOOD CITY, CA where this hospital performs Neurosurgy. I was told by SO many Drs, and Nurses that had I not ALREADY been at the Hospital when this rupture occured - that I likely would not have survived....that if the aneurysm had occured 10 minutes prior.... or even 10 minutes later, I would have been on the freeway and if the aneurysm had not killed me, the freeway probably would have!!
So YES, YES, YES - I feel there MUST be a REASON, a PURPOSE for why I was meant to survive. The "events" that lead to me having a Brain Aneurysm at that Particular Time, at that Particular Place was TOO syncronistic for me to "ignore". I felt then and I feel today that there is a "reason", a "purpose" - if even I don't know" yet, or" realize" yet, what it is - none-the-less- I BELIEVE THERE IS A REASON!! I survived in this way and that one day I will KNOW.
I did "survive" to care for my Mother as She lay dying
I did "survive" to care for my Father as He lay dying
I did "survive" to raise a GrandDaughter who needed me in the most ENORMOUS
I believe there will be more.
Yes, in the long run it was a blessing to me in that I changed to
become a person that I feel is much improved over the old me.
I have changed in a major way and I feel it is for the better, for
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