You sound really concerned and perplexed but you do not mention any evaluation or diagnosis by your pediatrician or any school personnel. Have you spoken to your pediatrician or the school guidance department about your concerns? I think that you should follow-up on having a full team evaluation through your school system or with a developmental pediatrician to see if she meets any diagnostic criteria. She certainly does seem to be gifted and it may just be that regular school programs do not interest her. On the other hand some of her behaviors are suggestive and a diagnosis may help you access resources to help her educational options. I encourage you to contact professionals until you get some answers that help you understand her better, if that is possible.
Thank you. You sound like a wonderful person.
I am not a doctor but I have volunteered with children with autism and Asperger's syndrome and I have a cousin with autism...and your daughter's behaviours certainly sound like they fall into this category. I am surprised that she has not been evaluated over the years. My neighbour's daughter who has some autistic traits is a history whiz. She knows about every period in history and facts and dates...it is incredible. She reads the newspaper every mornin from front to back and she goes onto history sites and watches history documentaries. She is very stubborn, oftentimes difficult although her parents are very strict and consistent with her so she has learned manners and other social skills...but she cannot even do simple math or tie her shoe. Her parents remind her all the time to look at whoever she is talking to. Your daughter sounds high functioning so there is hope that with treatment she could come 'round and be able to lead a productive life. Personally, if I had a child with any difficulties, I would home school him or her. My experience is that children who are home schooled are kinder and gentler than those who are sent to school where they are often sidelined and rejected and experience learning difficulties. Another friend has a child who could be called a slow learner. She sent her to school where she was teased and rejected even in grade one. She cried so much and withdrew and changed from a happy child to a depressed child. My friend decided to keep her home and teach her and the child became the happy, sweet and innocent child that she was. Being teased and tormented makes children put up defenses and walls and hardens them and makes them aggressive. So consider 'hothousing' your daughter and enriching her life with an education geared to her interests. You can get together with other families for certain activities so that she has the peer interaction under supervision. It sounds like your daughter is a special little person who with the right nurturing could become quite an interesting adult who can function very well in society. Good luck! BlueEgg
Thanks for the direction. Her pediatrician wanted to know if my marriage was okay....it has been stable for 6 years...rather good.The school doesn't really recognize her intelligence unless we bring it to their attention. We will try to find a diagnostic pediatrician. She was smiling and connecting today....