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18 year old stopped speaking at 3
My sister stopped speaking at 3 years old. soon after her MMR vaccine (UK). She has never spoken since but clearly understands everything we say. She is diagnosed with autism. Is there no way she will ever speak
Okay, so she can get your attention and make her needs known to you, but she isn't really motivated to 'communicate'.
What about interests or obsessions. How does she like to spend her time? I found some advice I got from Donna Williams very helpful. She said that if my son was doing something eg. doing a puzzle or making a model, that I should sit down next to him (not opposite), and that if I use words to say anything it should be short and simple and it should be about the 'object' of interest and not a direct communication to the person. So I wouldn't say 'Hi .... what are you doing?', I would say 'Wow that's a great model!'. I found that helped my son alot because I didn't cause him to switch sensory channels or put the focus onto him. He would then usually give me some verbal information about what he was making etc. If I had asked him 'what are you doing', it usually resulted in a tantrum or he would say 'I don't know'.
Have you tried mirroring what your sister is doing (just to see what her reaction to it is). When my son was younger I would try to stop him doing 'autistic' behaviour (that always led to tantrums and never worked), so I decided to try to 'join him' in what he was doing. As soon as I did that he paid attention to me. And whenever I communicated with him I used the words he used to me and the autistic behaviour he showed to me so that we both understood eachother and didn't mix up our messages!
Now your sister is non-verbal. I know it's really hard to make a call on this, but what is your gut feeling about her level of comprehension. Do you think she has learning difficulties outside of autism? Is she able to demonstrate learning in her areas of interest. For example I have an older sister with learning difficulties and dyscalculia. She has no understanding of numeracy at all. However her interest was in horses and when the showjumping was on TV she could add up the faults each horse had!
I am sure it must be very frustrating not being able to feel like you are communicating and understanding eachother. But, so many times autistic people know so much more than they let us see. As I said, they don't have the 'need to socialise' in the same ways that we do.
Have you tried to increase the amount of pictures/signs etc to reduce the barging and pushing? Next time she does that to get something, but that 'thing' in a picture and show it to her and explain what it is. Next time she does it again (and you know what she wants) put two pictures infront of her and ask her to point to 'which one you want'. Try to gradually wean her onto using the communication aids rather than man handling you.
Do you use a daily timetable of pictures showing your sister what is going to happen today?
Is your sister interested in computers at all? Can she work electronic equipment eg. TV/DVD player etc. Would she be interested in computer games.
What sort of level was she at at school. Does she have any understanding of literacy or numeracy?
My son has information retrieval problems so, if I put lots of numbers on the table and ask him to point to the number 15 he can do that. If I pick up the number 15 and ask him 'what number is it', he says he doesn't know. So, bearing that in mind you could try a similar approach with your sister. Ask her to point to ........ And in that way you will get a better understanding of what she is understanding. But again make sure you are asking her to point to something she is interested in eg. point to the ice cream (if she likes ice cream).
I know your sister is 18 and that my sister has a totally different diagnosis. But I have found that my sister has continued to develop and learn new skills throughout adulthood. At 18 she knew very basic stuff. She is now in her fifties and works and lives on her own with home help. So learning is an on-going process for all of us.
So I would try to approach her through her styles and interests.
Does she have any social life at all? Do you think she would enjoy going to something like trampoline class etc. Autistic people can be very good observers of others and she may start copying what other autistic people are doing.
Does your sister have any sensory differences. If so I would recommend you read an article by a woman called Olga Bogdashina that was printed in Autism Today. (If you google her name the article will come up). She gives a brilliant insight into sensory and perceptual differences and also information about different learning styles. You may find that your sister has significant sensory integration problems and may, for example, only function through one sense at a time. This may show itself by her appearing deaf when she is absorbed in doing something. Or she may be noise/light/touch sensitive. If you can get an insight into what her experiences are then her behaviour will seem much more logical and 'normal' considering how she is experiencing things.
What kind of support from outside professionals do you get at the moment.
What about interests or obsessions. How does she like to spend her time? I found some advice I got from Donna Williams very helpful. She said that if my son was doing something eg. doing a puzzle or making a model, that I should sit down next to him (not opposite), and that if I use words to say anything it should be short and simple and it should be about the 'object' of interest and not a direct communication to the person. So I wouldn't say 'Hi .... what are you doing?', I would say 'Wow that's a great model!'. I found that helped my son alot because I didn't cause him to switch sensory channels or put the focus onto him. He would then usually give me some verbal information about what he was making etc. If I had asked him 'what are you doing', it usually resulted in a tantrum or he would say 'I don't know'.
Have you tried mirroring what your sister is doing (just to see what her reaction to it is). When my son was younger I would try to stop him doing 'autistic' behaviour (that always led to tantrums and never worked), so I decided to try to 'join him' in what he was doing. As soon as I did that he paid attention to me. And whenever I communicated with him I used the words he used to me and the autistic behaviour he showed to me so that we both understood eachother and didn't mix up our messages!
Now your sister is non-verbal. I know it's really hard to make a call on this, but what is your gut feeling about her level of comprehension. Do you think she has learning difficulties outside of autism? Is she able to demonstrate learning in her areas of interest. For example I have an older sister with learning difficulties and dyscalculia. She has no understanding of numeracy at all. However her interest was in horses and when the showjumping was on TV she could add up the faults each horse had!
I am sure it must be very frustrating not being able to feel like you are communicating and understanding eachother. But, so many times autistic people know so much more than they let us see. As I said, they don't have the 'need to socialise' in the same ways that we do.
Have you tried to increase the amount of pictures/signs etc to reduce the barging and pushing? Next time she does that to get something, but that 'thing' in a picture and show it to her and explain what it is. Next time she does it again (and you know what she wants) put two pictures infront of her and ask her to point to 'which one you want'. Try to gradually wean her onto using the communication aids rather than man handling you.
Do you use a daily timetable of pictures showing your sister what is going to happen today?
Is your sister interested in computers at all? Can she work electronic equipment eg. TV/DVD player etc. Would she be interested in computer games.
What sort of level was she at at school. Does she have any understanding of literacy or numeracy?
My son has information retrieval problems so, if I put lots of numbers on the table and ask him to point to the number 15 he can do that. If I pick up the number 15 and ask him 'what number is it', he says he doesn't know. So, bearing that in mind you could try a similar approach with your sister. Ask her to point to ........ And in that way you will get a better understanding of what she is understanding. But again make sure you are asking her to point to something she is interested in eg. point to the ice cream (if she likes ice cream).
I know your sister is 18 and that my sister has a totally different diagnosis. But I have found that my sister has continued to develop and learn new skills throughout adulthood. At 18 she knew very basic stuff. She is now in her fifties and works and lives on her own with home help. So learning is an on-going process for all of us.
So I would try to approach her through her styles and interests.
Does she have any social life at all? Do you think she would enjoy going to something like trampoline class etc. Autistic people can be very good observers of others and she may start copying what other autistic people are doing.
Does your sister have any sensory differences. If so I would recommend you read an article by a woman called Olga Bogdashina that was printed in Autism Today. (If you google her name the article will come up). She gives a brilliant insight into sensory and perceptual differences and also information about different learning styles. You may find that your sister has significant sensory integration problems and may, for example, only function through one sense at a time. This may show itself by her appearing deaf when she is absorbed in doing something. Or she may be noise/light/touch sensitive. If you can get an insight into what her experiences are then her behaviour will seem much more logical and 'normal' considering how she is experiencing things.
What kind of support from outside professionals do you get at the moment.
Hi
My sister communicates her needs with gestures, barging, pushing. She only uses signs and picks out pictures for food.
My sister communicates her needs with gestures, barging, pushing. She only uses signs and picks out pictures for food.
There's also a nonverbal autistic that goes by the name Droopy on the autism speaks forum. She speaks with a communicator and she can type well. You wouldn't guess she's nonverbal by the way she types.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emPvLtOEs4Y
She has a thing against Amanda (thinks Amanda is using her life story for her own modivation), but I'll leave it at that. I thought her story was quite interesting. She didn't learn how to type until she was almost 30. It's also interesting to note she learned how to read at the age of 2, which I think is a normal age for beginning to read.
Either way both Amanda's and her video proved a point I had been wondering about. It shows that many if not all nonverbal autistics can understand language and be able to "speak" it in their head.
I'm pretty sure around age 4 when I was just beginning to speak, I could think words, even sentences clearly in my head, but they may or may not have gotten spoken.
I speak pretty well, but I do tend to stammer on occasion when I can't grasp the right word I want to use. The more anxious I am, the more I "forget" things, sometimes in mid sentence.. Perhaps that's one reason I tend to interrupt, besides thinking a pause may be an inventation for me to speak...
I prefer typing... That way if I lose a word, I can ponder over it (see what image I have in my head and find a suitable word to use that would describe the image or memory flashback). I also tend to think with a lot of mental images, memory flashbacks, and imaginary sequences, which makes translating sometimes difficult...
I mean how do I describe a memory of cutting down fox gloves at a greenhouse to be used as mulch. Meanwhile I'm thinking all kinds of things while doing it which are totally unrelated to the task on hand. If someone asked me how that day went, where do I begin? Do I talk about the surface task and how much to describe? I see the greenhouse in my head with all the flowers around me. How specific can I get? Or do I talk about my thought processes. Man I went through several... Which one to pull out?
It seems while trying to make the decision subconsiously my brain drags... Sometimes pulling up the wrong word(s)... That's why writing works well. I can describe everything that comes to mind. (within reason and mental limitations...obviously I can't speak of every little detail or I'd lose myself)
BTW if you're curious to know how I translated that experiance, you can find it on my blog as the very first post. Even then I left out a lot of things.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emPvLtOEs4Y
She has a thing against Amanda (thinks Amanda is using her life story for her own modivation), but I'll leave it at that. I thought her story was quite interesting. She didn't learn how to type until she was almost 30. It's also interesting to note she learned how to read at the age of 2, which I think is a normal age for beginning to read.
Either way both Amanda's and her video proved a point I had been wondering about. It shows that many if not all nonverbal autistics can understand language and be able to "speak" it in their head.
I'm pretty sure around age 4 when I was just beginning to speak, I could think words, even sentences clearly in my head, but they may or may not have gotten spoken.
I speak pretty well, but I do tend to stammer on occasion when I can't grasp the right word I want to use. The more anxious I am, the more I "forget" things, sometimes in mid sentence.. Perhaps that's one reason I tend to interrupt, besides thinking a pause may be an inventation for me to speak...
I prefer typing... That way if I lose a word, I can ponder over it (see what image I have in my head and find a suitable word to use that would describe the image or memory flashback). I also tend to think with a lot of mental images, memory flashbacks, and imaginary sequences, which makes translating sometimes difficult...
I mean how do I describe a memory of cutting down fox gloves at a greenhouse to be used as mulch. Meanwhile I'm thinking all kinds of things while doing it which are totally unrelated to the task on hand. If someone asked me how that day went, where do I begin? Do I talk about the surface task and how much to describe? I see the greenhouse in my head with all the flowers around me. How specific can I get? Or do I talk about my thought processes. Man I went through several... Which one to pull out?
It seems while trying to make the decision subconsiously my brain drags... Sometimes pulling up the wrong word(s)... That's why writing works well. I can describe everything that comes to mind. (within reason and mental limitations...obviously I can't speak of every little detail or I'd lose myself)
BTW if you're curious to know how I translated that experiance, you can find it on my blog as the very first post. Even then I left out a lot of things.
I think Sally44 was going in the right direction by asking how does your sister communicate? Verbal or not, people with autism must be able to communicate their wants and needs. There are plenty of options out there: picture exchange, sign language, augmentative communication devices, gestures... How does your sister express her wants and needs?
Hi, I was hoping for a bit more info before commenting. But here goes.
There are many autistic people who do not speak. I would suggest you do some searching on the internet and particularly look for autistic people who give reasons why they never became verbal.
As you have said, your sister appears to understand what you are saying. That too is quite usual. If you look on Youtube and search for a video clip called 'in my language' by Amanda Baggs, that will give you some kind of insight as she too is non-verbal, but she does use a computer to communicate.
Sometimes my son is unable to tell me things verbally. He says 'the words float around in my brain and slip out of my mind'. So your sister may be able to understand what you say, but may find retreiving verbal information difficult. So it is feasible that she understands what you say, but cannot access the words or put them into the correct order to make any sense.
There is another autistic woman called Donna Williams who talks about how she feels when she is 'put in the spotlight' and how she is unable to respond in those circumstances. Some autistic people cannot bear it when 'attention' is directed towards them and verbal communication does do that.
It is well known that autistic people in general do not give so much weight to verbal communication as we do. It simply is not that important to them.
But I would be interested for you to come back and tell me how she communicates her needs to you. Does she sign or use pictures for example.
There are many autistic people who do not speak. I would suggest you do some searching on the internet and particularly look for autistic people who give reasons why they never became verbal.
As you have said, your sister appears to understand what you are saying. That too is quite usual. If you look on Youtube and search for a video clip called 'in my language' by Amanda Baggs, that will give you some kind of insight as she too is non-verbal, but she does use a computer to communicate.
Sometimes my son is unable to tell me things verbally. He says 'the words float around in my brain and slip out of my mind'. So your sister may be able to understand what you say, but may find retreiving verbal information difficult. So it is feasible that she understands what you say, but cannot access the words or put them into the correct order to make any sense.
There is another autistic woman called Donna Williams who talks about how she feels when she is 'put in the spotlight' and how she is unable to respond in those circumstances. Some autistic people cannot bear it when 'attention' is directed towards them and verbal communication does do that.
It is well known that autistic people in general do not give so much weight to verbal communication as we do. It simply is not that important to them.
But I would be interested for you to come back and tell me how she communicates her needs to you. Does she sign or use pictures for example.
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