mom with breast cancer

[tammy30]

My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer 2 weeks ago.  I don't know alot of information, she's only giving me a bits and pieces.  Anyway, she's had a mammogram, an ultrasound and then a biopsy that came back positive for cancer. She supposed to have an lumpectomy and treatments.  It was then decided to go ahead and do reconstruction at the same time.  
She had an appt. yesterday about the reconstruction and was asked if it had spread to the lymph nodes (which we don't know).  If it has, she will have to have radiation which will damage the reconstruction.  So now she's supposed to go Monday to the surgeon to see if it is in the lymph nodes.
It's beginning to feel like she's not getting all the information that she needs to make the decisions. She is totally confused and overwhelmed with everything.
Also, I have 3 kids 2 are in school the other is almost 1 yr and stays with Grandma.  How long will the recovery be from the surgery and what do we need to expect (sickness, etc.) from the chemo and possibly radiation?
Can anyone give me any information that might help her? This is all new and confusing to us.
Please help.  Thanks.

[txgrl01]

I think recovery probably varies according to physical condition, age, medications, mindset, etc.  Having said that, I took to heavy duty pain killers in the hospital and the 1st day at home.  The rest of the time I took 800 mg Motrin as needed for about one week.  The drain totally grossed me out so my niece and husband emptied it for me twice a day.  It took me 5 days before I could use my arm well enough that I didn't need help dressing/undressing.  I really hated that. The surgeon saw me at 7 days and said he was amazed at how fast I was healing.  I am big on vitamins and believe they helped with the healing. I was not taking any meds prior to having BC.
I went to church 10 days after surgery but in retrospect should have waited the extra week because I had to take Motrin and elevate my arm afterwards.   I went back to work part-time at 3 weeks and full-time at 4 weeks.  I think that if my job had been more physical I might have had more dificulty with the transition but my co-workers were real mother hens.  I started health-walking again at 8 days but it took me a week to do more than 2-3 blocks.  At 7 weeks I was back up to 3.3 miles, just went a little further each day.
I did not have radiation so I'm sure that helped with my recovery and so far only minor side effects from the Tamoxifen. I could do without the headaches.
Your Mom is my Mom's age and I'm sure my Mom could not have recovered so quickly. I really do understand the wanting to just get on with my life part. I am praying for you and your Mom.  I have been a caregiver and know how stressful it was.  Take good care of yourself too.  God Bless.

[MSUSHE]

Hi TXgr01,

After reading your comments, I was curious to know how you felt after you mastectomy.  My mom recently had a lumpectomy for what was thought to be DCIS.  Unfortunately they didn't get clean margins, and needed to do a second lumpectomy.  This time along with clear margins, they found a small .5cm tumor.  Now she is faced with undergoing a third surgery to find out if the nodes are affected.  She would in turn go through radiation followed by Arimidex.  I'm wondering if it would be worth it to have the mastetomy and not have to worry about the radiation.  They could do the nodes at that time as well.  How was your recovery for the mastectmy vs. lumpectomy?  How long did it take you to recover from you mastectomy?  My mom is 76, and was very fatigued after the two lumpetomy's...she's just very tired from all of this back and forth, and wants to get on with her life.  Thanks in advance for your response...and I am praying that you and your family.

[tammy30]

Thanks for all the info.
I think she has decided against the reconstruction.  Since its just supposed to be a lumpectomy, I think she just going to try the prosthesis.  
She goes back to the surgeon next week.  He's talking about doing radiation, then surgery followed by chemo.  
What do we need to expect from the radiation and chemo?  My grandmother had radiation and chemo about 17 years ago after colon cancer.  She was terribly sick and after a trip to the ER, she stopped treatment.  Hopefully things are better now, but I'm still expecting her to be sick.
Thanks.

[Flasparr]

Tammy said it all....don't cut until all the questions are answered.  Write down everything, get copies of all the reports and labs.  Research any substance, including contrast dyes, that will be injected.  Reconstruction can be done anytime after surgery if needed...months to years later.  I will pray for you and your mom.  

[txgrl01]

Recovery from the lumpectomy was really not too bad.  I went in expecting the surgeon to take out a golf ball specimen and he ended up taking a softball size.  Pain wise I only needed 800 mg motrin for 3-4 days.  I was given some heavy duty stuff for pain but never needed to use it.  I was back to normal in about 10 days.
Bending over was the most uncomfortable part of recovery.  Any time I bent over, I had to support the breast with my hand.  Gravity is the enemy while healing.  Have a good fitting sport bra to wear home from the procedure.  I am large chested so I had to special order mine from JCP.

I ended up going back for a mastectomy but that was my choice since I didn't want radiation and family history was a bit too scary.  Right now I'm not doing chemo, only Tamoxifen.  I am waiting for my Oncotype DX results to decide on chemo as I was in an intermediate risk category with standard stuff.  Intermediate risk is a sometimes yes/sometimes no on chemo.

I am not having reconstruction but I am hoping to have a reduction on the contralateral side, if my MRI biopsy is benign.  I requested an MRI when I was initially diagnosed (ACS guideline to check the contralateral breast).   It came back with an area of concern so I'm going to have another biopsy in about 10 days.

[tammy30]

Thank for the info.
She decided to find out if it had spread to the lymph nodes.  She had an outpatient dye procedure on Thursday.  The dye went to 3 lymph nodes, so they removed them.  They tested cancer free.  Finally some good news.
Her doctor is talking about doing radiation first, to help shrink it before surgery.  Then possibly chemo after.  She is still unsure about the reconstruction. Is it worth going through?
I don't know alot, I'm just the daughter and I'm just getting bits and pieces of everything.
How is the recovery after the lumpectomy?
Thanks.

[txgrl01]

It was totally overwhelming and I, too, felt like I didn't get enough information to make a good informed decision prior to my lumpectomy.  Your Mom needs to put the brakes on a little, if medically possible, until her surgeon answers all her questions and concerns.
Re: the lumpectomy.  If she has lumpectomy, the medical standard is to have radiation afterwards.  Radiation can affect the skin tissue so reconstruction may have to be delayed.  
Is your mom having the SLN (sentinel lymph node) test at the same time as lumpectomy?  Mine was after the lumpectomy and at the same time as the mastectomy.  Ask the surgeon to combine the lumpectomy and SLN, if possible.  My surgeon said that if the sentinal node was positive, then he would elect to do the axillary removal during surgery to keep from having a 2nd procedure.
SLN and axillary:  ask the surgeon to explain the differences clearly and draw it out for you.  Hve the surgeon explain what a positive reading on the nodes would mean for her treatment plan.
I know that you are getting this too late for your Mom's Monday appt but if she is still unsure.  Have her make another appointment, to allay all her questions.  
I hope someone is going with her to act as her scribe and write down all questions and answers.  I couldn't remember most of my conversations clearly and having the notes to look at helped both my husband and me so much.  I am praying for you and your mom.