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2 1/2 year old son not sleeping
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2 1/2 year old son not sleeping

My 2 1/2 year old son started having very agressive behavior towards the other children and teachers in daycare since mid October.  He will scream at the top of his lungs, hit/bite the other children and teachers.  He gets very angry if you try to redirect him or confront his behavior.  We have had several times were another parent will come to pick up their child and my son will go right up to the child and smack him across the face for no reason.  The owner of the daycare said they have tried everything and are unsure of what to do with him.  His behavior is much worse at daycare.  At home seems to be more controlled.  He was diagnosed with the coxsockie virus on Nov 24 has has not slept since.  He constantly wakes up every 30min to 2 hours throughout the night crying.  At times he doesn't seem to even be awake and it takes we awhile to console him (I don't take him out of the crib).  I have consulted with his doctor and they were no help.  I very afraid that his daycare will throw him out.  I'm trying to be proactive.  What is my next step?
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13167_tn?1327197724
The tone of your post makes me kind of sad - he sounds VERY aggressive,  and just went through an illness,  and isn't sleeping - and appears to be having sleep disturbances that used to be called "night terrors".  

But it sounds to me like your main focus is making sure the daycare doesn't kick him out.  

It sounds like that's exactly what he needs right now - to be home with his mom,  with a lot of love and care and one-on-one time and loving discipline.

Best wishes to you - your description sounds like your child needs intervention very soon.
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I wish staying home was that easy.  I work because I have to, not because I want to.  I would love to be a stay at home mom.  I actually give my son a lot of love and attention and unfortunately this does not leave a lot of time for my 6 year old daughter.  My main goal is to get him to sleep through the night and I think is aggressive behavior will improve.
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164559_tn?1233711618
And in case you have to work and don't have the option to stay home, Like Rock Rose suggested....

Watch his diet, get rid of sugar, artificial flavours and colours.  If it will make your life easier, let him sleep with you.  (I know that will make some people's bllod boil)  I agree it's nice to have them in their own beds, but he may need that comfort of snuggling with you right now.

Perhaps he needs to be in a smaller type of daycare.  Is he verbal?  Can he express why he is unhappy and acting out there.

I would also have him evaluated for food allergies, and he should be seen by a behavior specialist as well.

And then again, it may just be the terrible 2's magnified.

Let us know how you make out.  I hope you have a great, peaceful and relaxing holiday.
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13167_tn?1327197724
Lynn - here's a link on "night terrors".  It kind of sounds like what your son has - the incomplete waking up and crying -

There's a paragraph that might be helpful about preventing them.  I don't know about medication - that seems a little much - but the other tips might help.

Hope he starts sleeping well again.
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164559_tn?1233711618
You must be so tired.  Is there anyone who can take him for a night, just so you can get a good sleep?

Maybe do a movie date with your little girl over the holidays, I am sure she would appreciate having you all to herself for a brief time.  

Hang in there, it will get better.  

Ciel
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13167_tn?1327197724
Oops,  forgot the link,  sorry.

http://www.drhull.com/EncyMaster/N/night_terrors.html
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173939_tn?1333221450
Daycare settings can be overwhelming to most of 2 1/2 year olds and every one has a different method of reacting to the stresses. I don`t know how long your son has been there already but it can take up to 6 months to adjust, both for the teachers and for your child, even though most children do seem to be fine after a week or two.
Since such aggressive behaviour is not an option in the long run, your son needs to find another way of dealing with frustrations at daycare soon. If you have not already done so, talk to his teachers to find out when exactly the behaviour occurs. It can be transitions from one activity to another or when other kids get too close to him or it can be a lack of words that causes him to strike out or sometimes kids are being bullied by others and the teachers do not even see who started it or it happens close to nap time. Once you know the trigger, you can work out a plan with the teachers on how to nip the outburst in the bud by re-directing him or giving him some quiet time. You must be doing something at home that makes him act better there. Also, sometimes it helps to pick up your child from daycare just a little bit sooner for a while. They appreciate it.
Even though my son was never aggressive, he had immense struggles and nightmares during the time of adjustment to preschool between 2 1/2 and 3. He used to throw himself on the floor in anger and the teachers were at the end of their wits. He simply felt lost in such a large group and did not bond with any teachers because they treated him just like a number. Also, he had been bullied a lot and still now one of his buddies sometimes strikes him over the head out of the blue but nowadays he just stays away from bullies and enjoys his own circle of friends. His teachers now say they realized he was more like a little adult who prefered to be talked to in a calm voice rather than being commanded around like sheep in a playground. One more thing: during that age they do catch a lot of illnesses and that alone triggers a lot. No excuse to hurt other children, though!
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ADHA and Autsim are possibilities. Ever have him checked for either, how is his speech, ever try a antihistamine. Talk to your pediatrician
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi Lynn!

I have the same problem with my 2-1/2 year old. He wakes so many times in the night. He is excited to go to bed but by 11:30-12:00 he starts waking up. I think my problem is he wants a sippy cup. He is always asking for milk. He does have a lot of night terrors also. I am not sure if he is in a huge habit or if something else is going on. Mitchell is Lactose Intolerant so I always wonder if he belly is bothering him at night. If you find a solution please pass it my way. I would love one. Mitchell and I are both exhausted. I am lucky to be home right now as an at home mom but this won't last forever.
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