4 year old son does not play well with other boys

I am a stay at home mom of two boys... 4 and 1 year old. Our 4 year old goes to preschool 3 half days a week. According to his teachers, he does really well there.However he recently came home and said that some of the other boys were not being nice to him, and that he didn't want to go to school anymore. I spoke with the teachers about this and they said that they hadn't really noticed anything, but that they would keep there eyes on things. They said that he typically doesn't play with those particular kids, that he normally plays with a few of the girls.
Over the past few years, I have noticed that issues between my son playing with other children (especially boys) has become worse and worse. A few years ago I just chalked it up to him being 2 and he would learn to share and get along with other children eventually. However, it seems like it's just getting worse. He plays with a girl who lives next door who is 7 and she has been coming over less and less b/c my son tends to get very upset when they're playing saying things like "I'm not your friend anymore" when she wants to play something different than him. I also have a very good friend who has a son my son's age and my son really loves her son. However when they are together it's torture! They are like oil and water together. I've noticed that if they are tackling or play fighting each other they are great. But that's it.. they can't seem to agree on anything else nice to play together. From what I've noticed it's actually my son who tends to be overly sensitive when the other boy wants to do something different.I've also noticed that with a few certain girls he plays really well together doing certain things like playing house. But that too is short lived... these same girls tend to hear the same thing "I'm not your friend anymore" if they want to do something else. I'm just not sure what to do... How do I tell him that kids won't want to play with him if he's not nicer?

[margypops]

Perhaps leave him to get on with it, it seems that you care a lot about his feelings and sometimes we can be overly protective may be if you let him make his own friends and play how he wants, what I read about him sounds like a healthy and happy boy , playing the fighting games boys do with his friend but quieter ones with the girls. Dont tell him that kids wont want to play with him if hes not nicer. Take a step back and let him play the way he wants to.he sounds fine at school and the teachers are keeping an eye out there no bullying .so let it go,Good Luck

[Lyle604]

Ok I was the same as your son I snapped out of it in year 2 year too the way that I got out off it was my mum would take me and my friend to the park kids movies and I'm 17 turning 18 this year and we are still friends or maybe live it alone and it mite stop Hope I helped

[margypops]

Just to clarify it was jenhrakes son