Okay... I am growing more and more concerned about my son. A few months back I received a call and a letter from his school saying that he and another child exposed themselves at a school assembly. That night we talked to him about appropriate times to play with himself if he wants to and that it is a very private thing to do. We also told him that if he had any questions about his genitals, that he could talk to his stepfather, his father, or my brother his uncle. This blew over.. but.. then a few weeks back I received a letter from his teacher letting me know he pinched another child's penis. I questioned him about htis and he said it was from a dare from another child at school who had previously froze him out of social situations. We sat down, yet again, and discussed the importance of not touching other people's private areas no matter what. Now, yesterday as I was doing my grocery shopping I received a call from a close friend of our family. He grew up with my husband and he told me that my son had been singing a song indirectly to his daughter. It was about boobs, sucking on boobs, drinking the milk from them and about touching each other. I was highly embarrassed and I admit it I spanked him. I know it goes against what everyone says not to do because it can stimulate certain children. I also brought him over to our friends home and had him apologize to her and her parents. However, I don't know what else to do with him. I feel like I have done everything right to address these issues with him. What am I missing? Is there something I am overlooking? If anyone has any suggestions, I am open to the options and discussions....
I was just wondering if you've ever considered taking your son to a child psychiatrist or a child psychologist? It sounds like you've tried just about everything there is to try. Has he ever been abused in his life time that you know of or do not know of? Have you ever asked him about this? If he won't talk to you, is there someone close to him that he would feel comfortable talking to about private matters? (secrets). I have 3 children. 10,7 & 15 months. My 2 oldest know that if they can't talk to me or my hubby, they can talk to their aunt or my best friend. My 7 yr old was exactly like your son at the same age but his behaviors are caused by a medical condition. He's in spec ed now for half of his day and is integrated into a regular class for half of his day. I get phones calls left,right and center all the time. It is very stressful. One of these two types of doctors may be able to help you and your son figure out whats going on. But don't just accept just any answer. Make them prove their findings. Good luck.
On the other hand, you say "he and another child exposed", and "it was from a dare from another child at school", and "singing a song indirectly to his daughter" (what is indirectly?). Did he make up the song or did he hear it from someone. Kids of his age don't just come up with a song like that. And for him to repeat it, he has heard it more than once! So I really think that someone is -shall we say - helping him with his decisions.
I think he has a friend at school that is not the best influence on him. I would try and find out who that is. His teacher may be able to help. You can ask your son who he likes to play with at recess. Or does he spend any time at another childs house (again, he had to hear this song more than once).
Your responses have been good. It may take a few more for him to realize what he can or can not do (peer pressure is tough). I would really talk to his teacher to see if she has any insights.
I would explore these possibilities before seeking professional help. 6 year old boys are really a special group. That is why I have always thought Kindergarten teachers are Saints on Earth. Love him and see if you can find out who is leading him on.
Thanks to everyone who responded to my concern. I have gotten down to the bottom of things and Sandman2 was correct. He was being influenced and the teacher put a request to have them seperated for the next year.
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