8 year old cousin won't wear clothes at home!

[dane811]

My husband and I visit my cousin and her family almost nightly.  She has a daughter, who is 8, that refuses to wear anything more than her underwear every night (and she's even taken them off a couple of times).  As soon as she gets home, she takes off her clothes, and won't put them back on.  She's a little pudgy, and starting to develop breasts.  Her parents don't say anything to her, and her mom sticks up for her by saying, "That's just what she does!  She's going to be a nudist one day!"  It's making my husband VERY uncomfortable, and we've both agreed to leave if we talk to her mom and things don't change.  I don't want to ruin the relationship I have with my cousin, but I don't want my husband to feel uncomfortable either.  Is this normal?  Is there anything we can do?

[momagain59]

Does this child have special needs? Could she possibly have sensory problems such as her clothing bothering her? I would tell her parents that it makes you uncomfortable and not go over there if this continues. Maybe someone could get her a few oversized night gowns that she would be comfortable in. You can not expect them to change their ways when you are in their house. I am sure that they don't veiw their daughter the same way that you do. They probaly think of her as their little girl. When they come to your house, does this little girl keep her clothes on?

[RockRose]

Dane,  sometimes people aren't all that clear in their first post - "My husband and I visit my cousin almost nightly" - is kind of different from what's actually happening.

If they invite you over, and you invite them over,  etc.,  in your home you absolutely have every right to say in your home everyone stays dressed.  While I don't understand parents who think it's okay for their children to strip around people who are visiting,  it's their home and she's either craving attention or she's completely comfortable and doesn't recognize anyone else's discomfort.  Same goes for the mom.  Don't know which it is.

Best wishes.

[margypops]

As it is her home I guess its okay for her to not wear clothes if her Mom and Dad dont think it is necessary, maybe not go over as much if it makes your husband uncomfortable, although why would an 8 year old make him feel that way or is he picking up vibes from you that possibly you dont like it,sometimes men will go along with our opinions to keep the peace .If it makes you feel bad just cut it back or have them over to you when she will be dressed.

[dane811]

No, we're definitely not imposing on them.  They invite us over, we invite them over.  We just moved to the area, so we're not tired of each other (yet)!  :)  We're there about 3 times a week, so it's not nightly.  I don't know why that should matter, though.  That's not the issue we're having.  I'm not trying to tell anyone how to parent.

[RockRose]

Why are you and your husband over at your cousin's house every night?  

That seems like an incredible imposition on them,  especially since now you are trying to tell them how to parent.  

Maybe they want their privacy as a family?