I'm concerned that my 7-year old son could have borderline ADDHD but at the same time, could this just be normal 7 year old boy behavior? When seeing him play baseball for instance, he loses focus on the field (can't stay in the "ready" position, rolls around in the grass, always looking around himself and not at the game), is constantly "goofing" around in the dugout and doesn't seem to listen to the coaches instructions. I don't see any of his teammates acting in the same manner. At home, he has a hard time listening and following instructions, we have to tell him several times to do or not to do something, he interrupts my husband and my conversation, changes subjects when talking mid-stream, and has a tendancy to be very talkative at times. When playing with friends, he never knows when to "stop" goofing around, often to the frustration of some of his friends. However, having said all of this, he is doing well with his schoolwork (I never struggle with homework issues), has a good focus with his piano lessons and has plenty of friends at school. He never has had serious discipline issues at school and the teachers/coaches/principal say he's a very sweet boy that is well liked. However, in seeing a lot of the other boys in his class, my son appears more immature and rather impulsive. Would you consider the above behavior typical for a 7 year old boy or could he possibly have symptoms of ADDHD?
I am so glad you posted this. I am having the exact same problem with my 6 yr old son. None of the others his age act like this. He is in T-Ball this yr and he goofs around and tends to be in his own little world. I talked to his dad today and he told me that all of these signs that you mentioned are signs of ADD. My sons dad had it when he was my sons age. He still wets the bed which is suppose to be another sign. I found a website that will list all of these for you. There are 3 different types in ADD and the one that we are both describing is called Inattention. That is the one you should read. It goes a-i. There is a whole list. Let me know if this helps.
Often times kids with ADHD require structure to help them. At home and on a baseball field, you dont get the structure that they require therefore these behaviors come out. Also does he like playing baseball? Maybe simply, its not his thing. If you are very concerned, speak with your school psychologist at the school and he/she can provide you with checklists to see if he exhibits characteristics of ADHD.
Well my story is a little bit different from the first writer because my son is an 8 years old boy .He is very active and friendly.But he mostly gets into trouble when he goes to school and we do not see the behaviours at home that the teacher says he exibits at school.For example his teacher said my son says inapproprite words and tends to distract the others but one thing that i have noticed of him is that whenever he is in a group and something goes wrong he tends to take the blame and because of that he gets into trouble because he will speak the truth but the others will deny and also he is easily distracted.But he does very well with his school work . i dont know what to do and i cant understand what's going on can somebody please help me?
My daughter is a good hearted friendly child. She is also having trouble at school. My husband and I have noticed that her hyper activity is getting really bad. And we are going to be seeking guidence from our family Dr.. But at school I realized when she gets in trouble for talking, that she is not generally the only one talking but, she is a very loud speaker as am I so she is the one who gets caught because she's the one the teacher hears most. Also I've noticed that unfortunitly my daughter tends to get wrapped up with the kids that do cause trouble but of course she is the one who is caught. And as you said the other children will not fess up to their part. It is very possible that you son does do these bad things but, is he being influenced by another.
I have a 3 yr old grandson. We really need some help. I dont know if he is addhd. And from what i understand that he is to young to be tested. He is vary hipper ALWAYS into something. Hits other kids is mean to them. Will hit any one , bite them slap them. My son is getting married next mo. And his new wife will put him on insurance and going to try to get him into see a DR. But right now we are about to our wits end.He does not talk vary well still does not make sentances.You ask why he did something he says i dont know. Is there anything we can buy untill we get him to a Dr, that will help him calm down. I tried calm child it did nothing. And help or suggestions would be appricated.
I have a 7 year old son. He is very responsible. He helps out around the house, cleans his room, just a good kid most of the time. He is loud when he talks and he likes to play alot. At school, he makes good grades, but will play with his pencils while the teacher is talking. She has said he is very hyper and thinks he has adhd. Futher investigating on the internet, I found that only 3 - 6% of children worldwide has adhd and there is already 33% of the children in his class that is on medicine. (5 out of 15 children). The other thing that I have discovered is that school starts at 8:30 am and most of the children arrive at 8 am. They have to set in the gym and there is no talking allowed. Then they go to class. At lunch there is no talking allowed. These kids are in primary school which is grades pre-k through 2nd. My child is a morning person. He plays hard during the day and goes to bed at 8 pm. Is it reasonable to assume that if the children are not allowed to talk that they will talk somewhere? Anyone else have this problem. How much activity does a 7 year old boy require during the day? and how much interaction do they need with other children? I would appreciate any information.
Any school that requires 7 year olds to sit in a gym before school and not talk, and to not talk at lunch, is asking for the impossible. It sounds like this school has some very harsh rules.
My son is loud-- like his mom:)- and talks CONSTANTLY - like his dad:) He gets in trouble at school for talking too much and goofing off just about every day. But he gets very good grades, has friends,and is well liked. While he can be a bit of a smart aleck, he is also a very good kid most of the time at home, and at school, he is never disrespectful or intentionally disobedient.
He has been diagnosed with mild ADHD. But since he has no social issues, and no academic issues, and frankly, at home, no discipline issues ( he does talk too much--- but I can ignore him when I need to:) -- his drs have advised against medicating him. Additionally, he has some other medical issues that really prohibit us from using stimulant medication on him anyway.
If your sons grades are good, he could be just bored-- he might be very smart and simply does not have to pay as much attention as other kids to "get it" -- that's one thing about my son that his teachers have said. He's not paying attention as much as the others -- in part because he does not NEED to.
It sounds like you have a great kid-- congratulations!!! Sorry his school has such silly rules -- no talking during lunch---- my goodness that borders on insanity, I think.
I have a five year old who seems to be having a similar issue. He is very active and very helpful at home. He does have normal childhood behaviors and is easily redirectable at home- which does not seem in keeping with any diagnosis of ADHD.
He is having some problems only at school. His teacher is always commenting on things which seem really "picky" in nature. Mostly I feel that she needs to adapt some of her teaching skills to fit the kids in her class. She often complains that he will disrupt class- but when I ask for examples of what he may be doing... none of the behaviors seem to warrant her fixation with the issues. She often sends him to the office and he is on the verge of being dismissed from preK- which I find absolutely absurd.
There have been two episodes of behaviors which I did not endorse and these have been corrected. However after those episodes it seems his teacher is fixated with finding other things wrong with his behavior- often complaining about childhood behaviors that teachers would usually just handle on their own- without having to involve parents/principals...
I don't want to quell his enthusiasm and spirit however I wish there were some compromise that could also satisfy his teacher. I think my child feels as though he can't do anything right at school- she never endorses good behavior.
I need some help here. My 7 yr old boy attended a birthday party this past weekend. There were about 13 children invited according to the parent of the birthday boy. During the party my son was hurt in the back yard by a swing and ran from the yard, across an ajoining soccer field and into a creek. All the kids in the party followed him, along with the mom hosting the party. She found him waist deep in the creek and he told her, " I want to cut myself, I want to make myself bleed." She apparently retrieved him from the creek and walked him back to the party. When my husband picked him up from the party, my son did not say anything and neither did the parent hosts.
Later in the evening we received a phone call from the mom. She said she did not know exactly what happened to cause his flight from the yard as she was inside the house, but told me of the above events. When I questioned my 7 year old, he said a boy he did not know, laughed @ him when he fell of a small trampoline and hurt himself. Same boy also told him the birthday boy didn't really like my son and that my son was the last boy to be put on the birthday list for invitation. Then when my son hit himself in the face with a swing the boy said "Thats hilarious"
I can only imagine he felt rejected/sad/bullied by this kid and he ran to escape the scope of this boy, after being hurt emotionally and physically. What really disturbed me was the comment my son made to the mom about harming himself.
The next day I asked my son if he really wanted to make himself bleed at the time and he said yes. I asked if he still felt that way and he replied no.
I would appreciate any feedback. I'm scared about what he said. Do I need to seek help for him? Is this normal? Also should I call and chat with the hosting parents about what really happened?
I am reading the comments and I have the same issues. I have a 7year old boy who is always getting into trouble at school. The teacher has called me in to talk about his behaviour( only been back to school for 3 weeks). I have taken his special things away but nothing changes. He is really lacking a male role model as his father is not really involved. Some have suggested adhd but I am at my wits end.
Get him on Supplements ,one study recently has suggested that Food supplement treatment of ADHD may be of equal efficacy to Ritalin treatment, All children especially those with learning difficulties ,benefit from a multiple-mineral supplement with antioxidants, B Complex and Vitamin C and fish oil.and Experts advise parents to always focus on the positive side of any child's behavior, channel his energy in constructive ways.
My 7 year old son has been dignosed with ADHD and we recently put him on meds for it. I have fought with myself over this for the last year. We have modified his diet 2 years ago with kale and fruit smoothies; no sugar drinks no junk foods, no juices we read labels and limit sugar in his diet he gets whole foods and unprocessed foods especally no artificial sweetners. We have seen a big difference in that alone. If he has a treat I make it. I have always noticed a difference with Him. He has trouble making friends and keeping them, and he is a little socially backwards, behind. He has big impulse control issues. He just had no ability to refrain from doing something he knew to be wrong. We paid for the testing to be done and it was the best thing I could ever have done. We are getting him treatment for ADHD and some learning issues. Within one hour of taking meds we noticed a difference in him. In one month he has learned what we have been trying to teach him in 6 months. It is such a blessing. Healthy diet, supplements, and a healthy, structured enviroment is the best thing for them.
ADHD is diagnosed a lot in the USA. Lots of other countries do not even believe in ADHD. Children are children. They are active, they do not always pay attention and really how can they when they think so much more than we do. Children and teenagers are much more creative than adults because they have more brain chemical activity. I do not believe that any child should be put on Ritalin unless there is proof of a chemical imbalance done by tests to measure this not by observation alone. When you look at all the side effects of Ritalin and the organ damage that can result, I think every parent would question it. Let children be children. Active, happy and silly. A silly child is a happy child and we all want our children to be happy. Take care.
I've read most of everyone's comments above. I have taught for 11 years in elementary and middle school. I have four children of my own, three boys and one girl, ages 8 months to 11 years old. I had to speak out because I have seen first hand, the BIG difference between a boy and a girl. My daughter who is almost 3, can sit still and write and draw for hours where as my 4 year old boy can't! It's not ADD, ADHD, etc., it's the way boys are wired. He needs to have physical activities outside on a daily basis. SADLY, this is a practice that most school systems do not give importance to: such as DAILY P.E. or DAILY RECESS, or a combination of both. This is important for children to go out and run and interact with others outside of the the walls of a classroom.
It is such a sad thing to see how many children are being medicated, too early, too much, and these kids with amazing personalities turn into ZOMBIES. I've seen this in my classroom so much. I ask that you goggle alternatives to medication for hyper or active children (particularly boys) before you medicate your kid (and hopefully your Dr. will ask you to do the same). All children need structure, make sure you have a schedule for them when they are at home. Also, some of the expectations of schools are ridiculous! When I taught kindergarten at a public school I had 35 kids by myself and I was reprimanded because there were too many scuff marks on the floor and the janitor had to work harder in my room! I couldn't believe what I was hearing! I had my room set up in centers and my kids moved around all the time. We had quiet time and reading time, some kids had a harder time sitting for those times but please, they were 5 and 6 years old!!!
PLEASE, think and search alternatives before you run off medicating your children. Look into foods, drinks, etc. you may be giving them that is causing the hyperactivity or lack of concentration. Are they sleeping enough hours each night? Do they have a set time to go to sleep? Do they go outside and play when at home? You need to help you child "get the wiggles out" first before expecting them to sit still for a long period of time.
Just my humble opinion as a mommy of four and a teacher...
My son is 7 years old and suddenly he seems too much attracted towards girls. He feels like kissing girls and also feeling bad about it. Always he talks about girls and also sometimes compare with his mother. From his behaviour it seems like due to watching of excess TV.
My son is 7 years old and suddenly he seems too much attracted towards girls. He feels like kissing girls and also feeling bad about it. Always he talks about girls and also sometimes compare with his mother. From his behaviour it seems like due to watching of excess TV.
My son is 7 1/2 and he is having the same behavior problems that some of the others are having at school and at home. He has a hard time focusing on things and we are constantly reminding him over and over to do things and he still cant focus on what we say. He has been getting into trouble at school since kindergarden and it seems he is always running with the wrong crowd. The ones who always get into trouble, its like he is drawn to them. His teacher says when she calls on him he has no idea what the questions are and will always give wrong answers, she says that his school work is turned in alot wrong, but his homework is very good, he comes home and knows exactly what he is doing. I'm wondering if he is bored or he just doesnt click with her way of teaching. I know that if I didnt care for my teacher at school it really showed in my grades. He also has always wet the bed, and it seems he has a hard time getting close to peaple in relationships. He just isnt interested in people atall. He has friends at school and the teachers say he gets along with kids and is well liked, but then he tells me that they make fun of him and they say that he is mean and stupid. He gets into trouble at school almost daily and is getting detention for pushing and things pretty much every other week. He has a little sister who is 19months and I couldnt ask for a better brother, he is sweet and helpfull and wonderful to her. The teacher says she is going to put a group together for a SST. Does anyone have any advice on this?
Sincerely Frustrated & Confused
I to have the same problem with my 7 year old son. He is very smart and gets good grades. He just goofs off a lot and can't sit still. He doesn't lose focus on anything though. I don't know how to stop him from goofing too much. Sometimes kids don't want to play with him, because he likes to play rough. I don't know if its because he is an active athletic kid.
I have 7 year old twin boys and they are hyperactive and need to run off their energy. They are normal boys. To ask boys to sit and not talk all day is abuse. The whole system looks at grades and not at what is good for children, especially boys who are made to climb trees, run and create. To drug them up because they do not fit the package is not ok. They are children and deserve a childhood. And not to be on drugs. What are the side affects! What are the emotional effects of losing your childhood because your teacher wanted the class to "behave and get good grades".
I think it is not the boys who have to change but the system. In my day, wow I just said that, we had games every day at school. Now they do not. Does that not speak for itself.
I find being a Mum of boys hard too at times. Yes they are wild and not like girls. Mine climb trees, make creative stuff, build. If they are not busy with that they fight. Yes sometimes I feel like tearing my hair out but please please please try anything before putting any children on drugs because they act like children... It is there only childhood.
I have a 7 year old who has a temper like a bull, he is demanding and can be downright hateful at times. He needs to be going all the time, if he is not he cries and gets angry and me and my husband. We come home from work so tired and we spend the last 4 hours of our day outside playing and catering to his behaviour. I cannot take it anymore, the kids and the neighbourhood do not want to play with him. But at school he is bright and behaved and the teachers like him. Is this a normal 7 year old? Is the demanding and angry disposition normal?
Having raised a gang of sons, I think the kid is normal. Wetting the bed? If you don't make a big deal over it, it will pass. Many boys do wet the bed. The less said the better. Teach him how to change the sheets and be discrete about it.
If he is being so good in the classroom, he wants to please. When school is out, he needs to burn that energy!! I have always said, boys do not belong in a formal school setting until about ten...lol...
Well, he's perhaps not quite normal, but I doubt that he has ADHD. You can't turn it off and on at that age. If he can control himself at school and get decent grades, then he can do so at home. The problem is that he is bright and has learned how to control you. He has learned that the anger and and demands get him what he wants. This can be stopped, but it will take about 3 weeks of very consistent action on your part.
I suggest you get the book - "SOS Help for Parents," by Lynn Clark for a detailed list of actions.
I have an 8 year old and his school seems to be focused mainly on reaching the hightest TAKS (Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skills) scores (which the begin taking in 3rd grade, starting in K so they can keep their "commended" status. He is now in 3rd grade. Ever since day one in that school my son has been sent home with notes stating that he does not "participate in class". He does not test well and does not focus in class. After I saw his classroom(s), from K-3rd (he now has 2 classrooms in 3rd grade) it's not hard to understand why condsidering every square inch of the tiny rooms are covered with some brightly covered item (i.e. Mickey Mouse, ABCs, animal pics and so on). There are appxly. 25 kids per teacher. When my son returns home from school I go over what was covered that day in school with him and his mind may wonder. I keep him on track, because it has been a long day, and he DOES KNOW the subject material. My son, as well, gets blamed for things he has not done in school, he was just too shy to speak up and tell the teacher(s) who really did it. He has been bullied be both teachers and students to the point where my husband and I had a conference with his teachers and principal last year. The principal all but said he needed to be on meds, just like her, now grown, son. His teacher this year, one month into the school year, said the same thing!!! MY OPINION ... the principal and teachers are lazy and don't want to take responsibility for what is actually going on here. My eight year old does not need to be zombified to accomidate 24 other students, teacher and principal just so he can score higher on his TAKS so the school can get more money from the state. BTW, he comes home with fair grades, yet his report cards are always A/Bs. Something is going on with our school system. I know that my son's mind drifts and he needs to be kept on track, but to quote John Candy in "Uncle Buck" ... "I don't think I want to know a six-year-old who isn't a dreamer, or a sillyheart. And I sure don't want to know one who takes their student career seriously. I don't have a college degree. I don't even have a job. But I know a good kid when I see one. Because they're ALL good kids, until dried-out, brain-dead skags like you drag them down and convince them they're no good. You so much as scowl at my niece, or any other kid in this school, and I hear about it, and I'm coming looking for you!"
If by any chance your son has ADD or ADHD, he does not have to go on meds. However, there are many techniques to help him focus in class and at home. I suggest you buy the book, "The ADD/ ADHD Answer book," by Susan Ashley. It will not only help you figure out if he has something like ADD/ADHD, but will give you lots of valuable tools to help him if he does. It also will show you ways to force the school to accommodate (instead of ignoring) him.
If there is a "Children's Hospital" near you, you can call them and see if they will test your son for ADHD or ADD. There is also "ADHD/ADD Comb. Disorder" That is what my 8yr. old son has. Sometimes the hospitals will be doing tests for new medication's. The tests and medication is free and sometimes you even get paid for your time and travel. Good luck and best wishes!! -Marebear74
I forgot to tell you. Alot of times kids can just be kids. That is the way i thought, but when it affects their school work and their behavior at school. That's when it became a concern for us. That is when the doctors get concerned also.
I had wished that I even knew about ADD/ADHD when my son was in elementary school. He's 20 now so at the time I didn't know anything about it. Unfortunatly, he wasn't diagnosed with ADD until he had failed out of the 6th grade. By then, his need to be the "class clown" had worn down his teachers and his classmates and caused him to miss or be unable to retain important learning and social skills. With the help of his medication and assistance from a caring staff at a new school, he did a complete 360. My son was still himself but he was able to curb his complusive behavior and excell. He is in college now, but I can see where his troubles with focus in elementary school have carried on to his adult life and he has to work harder than his classmates because of some of the basic learning he missed out on. My advice is if you are concerned that this may be an issue, you really should look into it. The sooner the better.
Gosh, that must have been so hard to know some thing is going on but, not know what. Even harder to not be able to help your baby boy when you see him going down hill. I had to get on my son's doctors from thew time he was 4 till 8yrs. They say they don't like to really think about this disorder till at least 6 yrs. of age. It's just so needless to wait so long just to diagnose something you know is wrong. And the heartache and emotional toll it took on him is very sad and was so hard to watch. Plus even after having an IEP meeting for him at his school they still left him in a class w/ a teacher who had no idea how to help him and really treated him bad in front of the whole class. She put a circle of tape around his desk and called him a behavior problem because, he could not sit still and would try to go help everyone else in class. While the rest of the other children went to the rug for story time he was made to stay at the back of his classroom in his desk. Made him feel like an outcast. I walked in and saw that, well let's just say i think they all had a different idea of who i was. Plus i found out he was sitting in "In school suspension" with kids 2 x's his age; 3 out of 5 days of school. No wonder my baby was'nt learning anything. Just to let everyone know, if you have any problems with you child's school not teaching them properly, look up a group called "TEAM CHILD". They are great, promise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well... I am on here for basicly the same reason as everyone else... My son will be 8 tomorrow... He is extreamly smart, makes honer roll, does his homework etc... Yet when it comes to rules and impulse, he seems to loose himself in his acts. I tell him to not to do something, on first opertunity, he does it... I ask him to do something and get only greif. He gets over emotional, angry, sad, hyper. It seems everything he is feeling is extream one way or the other. He cant get along with other kids, there for he has really no friends to speak of. I've tried rewarding him when he is cooperative, When he misbehaives I have tried everthing from revoking privilages, grounding, talking with him. I've finally, after roughtly 6 years of this intense behavior, put him into councling. They put him on a very mild antidepressant... Which barely seems to make a difference. Just yesterday, while in the kitchen cooking dinner, he snuck out, took the neighbor boys bike and rode down the road. I went looking for him not even 5 min. later and he was about 2 blocks away! This behaivior SCARES ME! I've always been about trying to teach him thru words and experience, yet yeilding no results... He will make the same mistake over and over and over again. And when asked why he did it, knowing the consiquences, he replys, I dont know... I'm just dunb, why did you have me if all I do is stress you out... Horrible things... I try to go easy on him, yet now I feel stressed to a level that I'm not sure how much patience I have left for his behavior. He is such a lover... Hugs and kisses all the time, sweet little guy, yet his imlplulsivness and emotions seem to rule him... Any thougths on how to deal with this?
I have one very important question. Do his teachers see the same problem. Forget the grades - at this grade level a very smart kid will coast. Does he break their rules? Does he get into trouble at recess? Does he interrupt the teacher? Did he have a bad time at the start of the year and then adjusted to school and is now not having these problems?
I am so happy to read these posts and know I am not the only person in the "wondering what is going on with my son" stage. My son has always been an extrememly bright boy... but he has a hard time expressing himself and is very impulsive when he doesnt get his way or is upset about something. In school he is fine, does not get in any trouble.. the teachers say he is very well liked... he actually one the award for being the student of the month. He has a lot of friends, but he is only 7. I worry as he grows up other kids are not going to tolerate these impulsive behaviors he exhibits. In Kindergarten I had him going to the school psychologist to work on his impulse reactions and the psychologist said he was doing much better. This year he did not continue with the class because they said he was fine. I wonder if he is ADD or ADHD because at home also he has a hard time following simple directions and tunes my husband and I out. He almost seems lazy, but we realize he is zoning us out. If he does have ADD or ADHD we would not medicate him, so does anyone have suggestions on how to cope? help him? THANKS
I think the key words here are "extremely bright" and is "only 7". Kids who are young and very bright have minds that work faster than their common sense. They don't yet have the maturity to be more diplomatic. Its pretty much a "me" generation kind of thing. However, they do quickly learn what works and adapt to it.
It sounds like he has figured out what works at school (and sad to say for you) what works at home. I think that he is not so much zoning you out as he has learned that it is a easy way to get what he wants. Honestly none of the things you have mentioned are ones that would suggest ADD. It does suggest a very sharp kid (immature) who is bending his surroundings to his needs.
Suggestions: First, do enjoy him. This is going to be a ride for you. He will definitely get better as he matures. However, he will also become more calculating (dare I say sneaky).
You need to be very clear in your expectations. Both you and your husband need to always present a unified front (so he can't play one against the other). If you do punish him on the spur of the moment - he will probably use that to his advantage. Use immediate timeouts for a few more years (get "SOS Help for Parents," by Lynn Clark. for very effective ways to use this) and then when he breaks rules - maybe around age 10 - tell him that you will decide what to do and let him know the next day.
And you know the experience of school psychologists and teachers are not just for kids. Use their expertise to help you. Chances are his teachers have also had very bright kids. I was fortunated enough to have had a lot of them. They taught me a lot and hopefully I was able to do the same for them. Point being - get their suggestions too. Hope this helps. Best wishes.
SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR is hugely the culprit in my opinion we are dealing with hypoglycemia on many levels when their poor little bodies do not know what to do with all the refined sugar, white flour, white pasta they ingest etc. etc. The adrenaline kicks in and the blood sugar levels go wacko!! So.... less sugar and a really good multi-mineral vitamin (with NO food coloring) and hugely calcium magnesium before bed is helping immensely with my 7 year old boy. It turns his into an attentive, sweetheart:) I am a stay at home mom who has dealt with all levels of hyper, hyper, hyperactivity in my boy. (ADHD child)
I agree and believe that you are a very intellectual mother and teacher!! I have an 8 year old son who since the first grade has been in trouble at school for excessive talking and playing around. I on the other hand do not have hardly any behavior problems with him at home, he is kind, friendly, loving, and gets along with everyone. He does most of his homework on his own without help, and sits very quietly while doing it. His teacher suggested moving him up a grade last year since he is an honor role student and was at a fourth grade reading level at the age of 7 to see if maybe his problem was from being bored with class work that was not challenging enough for him, but when moved to the next grade it was decided that his maturity level was not that of the other kids so he was moved back. He often misses the "20" minute recess time at school for bad behavior, which I believe just adds to the endless energy that all kids have. I work as a substitute teacher and I see different school's discipline policies and classroom rules all the time. I have seen few that actually allow kids to be kids and ones who take the appropriate steps to teaching kids how to use self control.
I believe that too much is expected out of elementary kids when it comes to having to sit in a classroom for 8 hours a day with barely any activity time, and teachers wanting them to be silent all day. Kids are kids, they are playful, silly, talkative, fidgety, curious, rebellious at times and still trying to learn and figure everything out. I am tired of teachers and schools wanting 7 and 8 year old children to act like 12 year old kids!!
Ugh, One of the things that frustrates me with schools is when they take away recess from kids for being too energetic in class. The irony is that recess and running around/physical activity is exactly what a lot of kids need to stay calm in school. They defeat their own purpose.
I think if a teacher was complaining about the things you mention, I'd talk to them about other methods of working on it besides curtailing the outlet to their energy. In fact, perhaps if he had short breaks in which he could do something physical in the classroom, it would help him overall. Even little things like erasing a chalk board (do they still use those, lol) or a dry erase board can give some calming input to the nervous system.
School is an exciting place. Kids can get hyped up. I work with my kids to understand that school is the 'work place' and I will set up lots of fun socializing with their pals outside of school. And I do. It helps a little.
I have two boys, one does have sensory integration disorder and school is where we would see more problems than at home. But these are things I work on with both of my kids.
I know that when I'm in my 8 year olds classroom, I do my best to help the teacher bring down the 'chaos' level as it can be a bit much. I do understand that kids do need to maintain themselves in the classroom in a respectful way so that everyone can learn. But teachers would be wise to understand that movement, shorter sessions for lessons but many of them, and keeping the material lively would benefit all including themselves when they have a better behaved class.
Ya, the problem is the teacher and not the child. Having been both an elementary teacher and principal, I can say that some teachers just can't deal with an intelligent child. Be glad the upward movement did not work out!
I have found that most of the times bright kids will figure out what works and doesn't and will adapt. But I do agree that to miss a recess is a hardship.
I would try and find out specifically what he is doing that drives his teacher nuts and then work on that skill at home. Notice I did not say punish him! I said work on the skill he needs at home. There will be a carry over to school. If you can be more specific - I may be able to give you some suggestions.
my question: given the numbers of children on adhd medication, are his peers not acting like that because THEY are medicated? I would find out. 7 year old boys as far as I'm concerned are supposed to be active. Setting bounderies is important as well.
you are righ .my son is 7 yr old and he cant stay still,he talk alot and he has truble making frinds..he do not listens to me at all..but when he was little baby he was super cute and happy baby .,never got sick ,good eater ,good sleeper..zero troble kid..but now he is growing with behavior problams..though he help me alot in house hold chores but he runs in the mall,push in the partys.he is very emotional sweet boy who crys while watching movie.but he has no friends..i googeld alot and thought he has adhd problam ..but my hubby was angry with me he said i am not going to the doctor. he is energetic little boy..he has lots of energy all kids are like that ..i will never give him any medication for his behaviour ..good part is my son is super inteligent,he help his 6 year old brother with home work and all..so we will give him love and find a way to make him understan than medication.
There is a lot more to dealing with ADHD then medication. If you do think that he might have ADHD, I suggest you buy the book (its only about $10 on Amazon) "The ADD/ ADHD Answer book," by Susan Ashley. It will give you lots of non-medicine ways to help your child. It also will help you decide if he might have ADHD and tell you how to get help from the schools if it is needed.
My 6 yr old son has many of these same issues. None of them were a problem until he started school. Now behavior has started to be a problem at home too. It's just escalated weekly since school started and started to carry over. He has a wonderful, patient, caring teacher and also a para for his kindergarten room who is also a lovely woman with 4 children of her own. I know the problem doesn't stem from how is he treated in school, but it's just getting crazier and crazier. He punched another kid at latchkey! He's hilarious and adorable and loving, still sits on my lap and cuddles.
The first round of school testing placed him in the 90th percentile, so of course he's smart. All these kids with behavior issues are smart it seems. My crazy little genius got kicked out of kindergarten yesterday for bad behavior!
What is going on with these kids? How was most of this not an issue 30 yrs ago when we went to school? I feel it's going to end up being something we've all eaten, pesticides, food coloring, artificial vanilla flavor, (I don't really think it's the vanilla), I just keep wondering what is making our children so different in this decade?
You might want to visit his class and see how the kids are disciplined. Sometimes, what the teacher or aide does is not very effective (especially if it is a large class). If all they do is say NO, a sharp kid will eat them alive.
Did he go to a preschool or is this is his first year in a large school/class setting? Also curious if you have a younger child at home (say between one and two) as sometimes this can also cause some attention getting things at home.
Finally, you can't do much about what is going on at school. But you can control things at home. But I am not sure what is going on at home. There is a good chance that what he is doing is not due to what he has eaten (always slightly possible), but rather more to being a fairly sharp 6 year old boy who is trying to control his little world.
Thank you for posting ur story ! Im having around the same problems with my son to.. He just started wrestling ,an he is the one that wanted to go into it so im not thinkin that he dont like it ,but I have been watching him at practice an he has been kinda in another world when it is time to be learning something ! I catch his attention an remind him to listen ,an he will for just a sec an then go straight back to looking around or talking to a friend ect . He has been getting in trouble in school for chewing on pencils ,erasers,ect im just really gttn concerned ! Also he is simular at home an around friends with not listening an not knowing when to stop acting crazy ! Please someone help me ! Ive thought about checkin with a doc about.adhd but I really wanted meds to be my last resort so if anyone has any natural
Remedies to try please let me kno asap thanks ,stephanie
How old is he?
First, you can't even think about natural remedies if you don't know what the problem is.
Second, meds are always your choice (and there are many), getting help for your son should not be your choice. There are many behavioral strategies to try and many ways that a school can help your son if he does get diagnosed with ADHD! But you don't know what to do unless you know what the problem is.
I repeat - no one can force meds on him.
Also, he does show some signs of sensory integration disorder. That is not treated with meds, but by an occupational therapist.
So I have included two sites to check out. The first is for SIDS and the second is for ADHD.
And finally, I have seen lists of things in the diet to avoid. But, in the 6 or more years on this site - I have never had a parent report any natural remedy that helped (nor have I seen any research to support that). And I should add - that like meds, your child would need much more help then some magical pill.
Haven't read the report you mention but a British medical study in 2011 took 100 children with ADHD of various levels, (all statemented) and found 60% of them had a beet sugar intolerance, amongst others, but beet was the highest common factor. When removed from their diet, all children's level of ADHD reduced significantly. My son's behaviour has also improved considerably since removing it from his diet, and school pronounced it a miracle. Although we still have someway to go yet with his behaviour, beet sugar continues to be avoided. There is bound to be a mineral / trace element factor involved in this difference of sugars and wish someone would establish what this is, as Cane sugar seems to be fine.
Thats interesting I have never heard of that. You don't have a link to the study do you. I would love to find out more. I have seen lots that show no sugar link to hyperactivity - but nothing that ever looked at the type of sugar. The idea that you could make anything good for you out of beets has always amazed me.
Anyway, the nice thing about diet changes is that it is something that is can be done and modified till it works or it doesn't. Thanks for the post.
Like nearly everyone on this very long list, I have a 7 yr old son who has always been a bit of a handful. He is very clever, funny, kind, loving, and can be quite vulnerable at times. However he has since moving to Texas from the uk been getting into trouble more and more regularly at school. He gets easily distracted and likes to mess around and play fight with other boys but when he is told off, gets angry and struggles to control his reaction. This gets him into trouble with teachers who consider his reaction or in some cases attempts to argue with the teacher and explain the situation from his perspective disrespectful and inappropriate. He also gets into trouble for deciding he does not want to join in with certain activities in class like dancing or singing. Every time he reacts badly he is sent out of class and now he has been sent home! We talk with him daily about the right way to react and not to answer back when told off, but this makes no difference. If you shout at him or get frustrated he cries and tell you you are hurting his feelings so we talk calmly to him and try to get him to understand the impact of behaviour and that it is not his choice what to do at school. We are talking to the school psychologist and trying to make a difference but really do not know what the problem is or how to help him stop this. Help!
I have two autistic daughters and im starting too see traits in my two sons very emotional wont concentrate have too repeat questions get obsessive about one thing like things done a particular way need an crave routine is anyone else experiencing this ?
He has had a huge change in his life and - wow - Texas? Thats an even bigger change. He is only 7 and doesn't have the tools to express himself. I would think the school would be a bit more understanding. You might try talking with his teacher and telling her what a change it has been for your son. Maybe she could find some other way to work with him.
Has he been in school since early Sept. or has he just recently been enrolled? It makes a difference.
You might try some books by Adolph Moser who is a psychologist that runs a holistic based youth center for kids with challenges. Here are some of the titles-----------"Don't Pop Your Cork On Monday" and "Don't Rant and Rave on Wednesday" and "Don't Feed the Monster on Tuesday" and "Don't Despair on Wednesday" and "Don't tell a Whopper on Thursday" and "Don't Fall Apart on Friday" and "Don't be a menace on Sundays". These are part of his emotional impact series and are written well with good illustrations
And, I think, he really needs a friend if possible. See if there is any one that you can invite over for a playdate.
If he did not have these problems in the UK, then a lot is definitely due to the change.
This all looks so familiar. My son Logan is 6 yrs old. He's having so much trouble in school. It started in PreK not paying attention not taking naps and they'd put him in the hall alone :( Now in kindergarten he has trouble listening to direction, paying attention, he makes alot of loud noises repetitively when he gets annoyed or confused. Logan is so smart and sweet most of the time but really has this agressive other side to him. I hate to see him struggling so much. And the teacher is no help because she just gives him bad colors and sends him to the principals office. Our kids are not programed robots they are not all going to act the same that doesn't make them bad kids. I've wondered if Logan should be diagnosed with something I dont know if that would help or not. Maybe they'd try to understand and work with him differently? Good luck everyone. Good or bad ,rotten or sweet they are our children we must love them unconditionally and treat them with respect and patience.
As a retired elementary school principal, I can't believe that a teacher would be sending a kindergarten child to the principals office rather than working with the child. Have you ever visited the classroom to see what is going on?
Anyway, I also am the CL here - http://www.medhelp.org/forums/ADD---ADHD/show/175 Why not post here and we will have a discussion about the possibility of ADHD as he does show some of the symptoms.
Oh, when did he turn 6?
my sons behaviour has gone down hill in the last 2 yrs. he is very aggressive towards me and his dad he does act out at scool but mostly at home he throws things and when they break he say i didn't mean it. i went to the docs last november about this and they have sent a letter to the hospital but we still waiting 4 a reply.. yesterday he pushed one of his teacher and has been given internal exclusion which he doesn't seem to care i am very worried about my 2 daughters safety when he does have one of his moments. should i get in contact with the doc again and demand that she does something about it as i am at the end of my tether with him.... when he is gd he very gd...
Don't be so quick to label your kids with ADD. I was the same with my son at first, but the truth is we are teaching our bright kids to divide their focus and attention all the time. This learned behaviour is them played out in the classroom and other activities. Your kid may just have learned to divide his attention across a multitude of activities, or expect a wide range of information from a number of sources.
We looked at home for the culprits - us! we had the TV on during breakfast and dinner, and were still asking questions like 'Have you packed your school bag or how was your day. Once we switched dinner to the dinner table and had the first 5mins of the meal no talking, our children were better able to focus on the activity in hand only, instead of dividing their attention constantly.
really look at what is going on in your lives. When you are with your son, be present with him - don't make dinner, don't have tv or radio on. Demonstrate to him what it is like to be present, to listen to hear and to reflect.
Once you model this behaviour and these skills, he will follow. It will start with you.
I went for a walk with my son along the beach today. The walk took around 45 mins. He basically had one sentence that lasted that entire time, barely pausing for breath. I think sometimes they just want to talk. My job for the whole walk was just to listen.
I personally feel that it is so helpful to identify when underlying things are going on and to address them. Wow, did it change my son's world. He has sensory integration disorder. Labeling is one thing some mention as 'bad' but I feel so differently. It is how I understand what my boy needs to feel good. Early intervention makes all the difference in the world and I hope no one is ever afraid to do this for your child. good luck to all
He needs the speech issue addressed first and foremost. That in itself will cause some anger issues from a very young age. It makes it hard for them to make friends and they often get put down for not being able to speak well. It really hurts their self-esteem.That would be my first priority. Speech therapy does WONDERS and its free through the school even as young as 3 years old. They do not have to be school-aged. There is a program if they are less than 3 where they will come to your house and work with him. I don't remember what it's called, but it is also free. He also needs some type of goal chart and whenever you catch him doing something good, whatever behaviors you want him to have, you put a sticker on the chart and at the end of the week he should get a reward for however many stickers he has. The more stickers, the bigger the reward. He needs firm boundaries and consistent consequences. My first son was just like you described.
Thank you so much for this comment. My son just turned 8 on Dec.29th, he is in the first grade. He is the most kind , loving kid. He is in title one, for reading. I thought he was doing pretty good, until I got a note of concern from the teacher. Her and the title one teacher have noticed some concerns that he is catching on to some things and not a lot of the other things. They are sending a list of things to watch him for survey they call it. Looking for signs of adhd. He daydreams a lot, I talked to him about it, and he knows he does it, also I help one day a week in the classroom, and it is a wild crazy class. The teacher is good, but, she talks really fast, it is all so fast pace, it is a perocial school, would he have better luck in a public school? I left out, he has a huge imagination. Help! I want the best for him,and it would crush me if he turned into a zombie. Also, he is very well behaved, respects, stays still, can talk loud sometimes, he is always, always positive. What do I do?
First, the only way he could turn into a zombie is if he has a doctor and parents who don't communicate and also don't understand what to look for.
Yes, unfortunately kids do get overdosed. And that is always the fault of lack of communication/information between the doctor and the parent. Medication done correctly will make the situation better not worse.
Now having said that, there is no way to know yet if he has ADHD.
Typically a public school is much better at dealing with issues like ADHD. The parochial schools typically just don't have the resources or experience to do so - but there are exceptions.
So what do you do? You make sure that you understand what ADHD is. And if he turns out to have ADHD - you make sure that you become the expert in it. Because it is really you that will make a difference in his life.
So, do look at the survey to understand what they are looking for.
Here is a link on the different types of ADHD and what to look for.
My bigger concern is that he is a very old first grader and he is behind in reading. What happened to get him into first grade so late? I am guessing that his K teacher had him held back? This may be more then ADHD. There could be some real learning problems and a parochial school is not the best place for that. Given his age, he should be getting lots of extra help. I think that a public school would be the best place for that.
My son is going to be 6 years old in 2 months. He was having hard time listening. In fact there were times when he would run on the road in zebra crossing(when he was excited when his friend was around) - we had given strict instructions and he waits before zebra crossing nowadays. Now, I see that in school, he sits quietly when he shouldn't move, but doesn't listen to teacher. If she says raise your hand if..., he would simply raise his hand without listening to if clause. Same thing I see happening in basketball class. He is not listening to instructions like, "bounce the ball, touch as many circles as you can and count them". He only bounces the ball. He doesn't bother to touch the circles at all, leave about counting! When kids are asked to throw ball to each other, when my son is waiting for his turn, he doesn't stand still, he keeps dancing. What should be done for my son's listening skills/taking instructions?
It is very common for 6 year old boys to not listen and move a lot. And he is a very young 6. Hopefully he is in K and not first grade. Big question I guess is how does he compare to other boys of the SAME age?
In basketball class, thats a tough skill if you have never done it. Practice with him. Start easy and slow and slowly work up. This can be done at home.
Chances are he will be more attentive if he gets a chance to run around before practice.
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