ADHD /sensory problem 5 year old boy

[Becmn]

My 5 year old son is showing some behaviors that are concerning. When he was 3 and 4 in preschool he was very busy and somewhat impulsive. He is very smart and verbal. We thought he would out grow the hyperactivity/impulsivness.
Know in kindergarten it is just as bad. He often will get in his friends faces while playing or touch their faces/heads etc. not meaning to be aggressive but ofcourse they don't like it. So far it is not affecting him socially -he is a leader in the class and kids tend to flock toward him.
He also bites his nails and during a time where he needs to be sitting and listening he chews on his shirt sleeve- actual holes in his shirt.
He also has bit and hit a few times this year.
His teacher says she sees it as very impulsive not premeditated.
She enjoys him in the class b/c he adds so much to discussions and haS GREAT IDEAS. wE ARE TRYING A MARBLE SYSTEM WHERE HE EARNS THREE MARBLES AND earns a happy face and we reinforce it at home with a sticker,book etc..
He was not earning them so we have tweeked it so that he will earn them for 2 weeks and we will get buy in them we wil target the harder behaviors.
We are doing timeouts for any aggresive behavior- time out immedietly- no warning. Verbal behaviors -whinning etc. we are ignoring completely-

He does seem to want to control his body and just can't.
He is in a class of 12 which I thought would help but it does not seem to be.
I am not at all worried about acedemics I am wooried about social behavior. We have met with a behavior person who says its most likely ADHD-
I am wondering if there could be other things going on.
Home life is very stable- 2 parents
1 brother 1 sister -he is the oldest
Not wanted to use meds but I will if I have to. I want his school experience to be positive- so far he loves school and wants to go every day but everyday there is some incident where he has been impulsive or just hyper-
  

  

[jennai]

I have a 5 year old step-son who was removed from preschool and given an IEP, he was sent to another school special for children who have problems. His behavior at the previous preschool was that he would disrupt class, hit and kick teachers and peers and would talk back and just not listen. He was taken out of the classroom more often than he was in there. Now that he is at this new "school" he still hasn't changed. In the last 2 months I feel he has actually gotten worse. We get notes sent home every day stating what happened that day. In the last 5 months we have only gotten 1 or 2 good notes. All of the others he has either hit, kicked, bit, thrown chairs, thrown toys, etc at peers and at the teachers. They have about 4 or 5 kids to every 2 or 3 teachers. He gets time outs frequently and even has to be taken to a time out room because he will yell and scream when he is in time out. His parents are separated, he never knew his parents together. I have been around for about 4 years, came around when he was about 1. I have seen in these last 2 years things deteriorate. He use to not have problems at his dad's house and if he did they were minor. In the last 2 months the same problems he has at school have spilled over into our house. If we have to take him to his mom's he'll kick and scream and say he hates his mom and doesn't want to live there. His mom is married and he has a sister and step-brother. His dad and I have no other children. I do not know what to do anymore. I have tried a chart and stickers for good behavior, we have tried time out's, we take away video games and tv time. If he had it his way he would sit in front of the tv watching cartoons or playing video games from the time he got up until the time he went to bed. He even fights us to go to sleep now. He use to lay down at 9 and be out but now we will fight him until 1 or 2 in the morning for him to go to bed and of course I wake him up the next morning and he is grouchy and mean. If we tell him no or take something away from him he will even hit one of us or yell I hate you, etc.
I am running out of ideas... we had the school call and they are referring us to a psychologist, but I don't know what to do until things are straightened out.

[tootie828]

I have a 5 yr old son who is in kindergarten.  He went to headstart and preschool,  where we noticed the first signs of problematic behavior.  He has worked with a speech therapist for 2 1/2 yrs.  His behavior seems to worsen.  During this time we had him evaluated by a child psychologist and I wasnt happy with the outcome of this.  They did nothing for me or to help my child.  Now he is in kindergarten and experiencing this same scenario of behaviors again.  I have talked to his dr. about his behaviors and how hard they are at times to manage.  He gets notes sent home from school everyday about him hitting and misbehaving at school.  My husband and I can hardly have a conversation at all without him blurting out things and being the center of attention all the time.  I CANT HAVE A CONVERSATION PERIOD~!   I have meetings set up with teachers and speech therapist to see if we can get my son the help he needs.   I PRAY THERE IS AN ANSWER~

[sheila771]

This sounds exactly like my son.  He is now almost 12.  He is ADHD.  Alot of the time he cannot control his body.  Constantly shaking hands, cracking knuckles, toes and any other part of his body he can.  He also has ODC and problems with Aniextly.  He does horribly in school but the teacher love him.  He has tons of friends and is Mr. Popular.  He excels in all sports.  He was labelled as a trouble make by all parents and had kids kept away from him.  When he was 7 after being suspended from school so much we tried him on Ritalin.  Through alot of trial and error we have found a dose that makes him a fun loveable kid.  Not a mean violet one.  The parents who would not let their kids play with him now have him for sleepovers and let their kids at play at our house with him.  This is not a miracle drug.  Mornings in our house are horrible until his meds kick in.  I constantly have to carry the meds with me for when he comes down and starts acting up, yelling, making strange noise, and get violet.  I have learned over the years when to give his next dose before this happens but sometimes you cannot always be their and have to rely on other and hope for the best.  He on Strattera which has helped tremendously for his OCD and Anxietly.  He is on 40 mg of Strattera a day and 90 mg of Ritalin.  We have tried the 12 hour ones (Concerta, Adderrell)  We have been told he has a very high metobalism which is why his dose is so high and I can regulate the slow and fast release ritalin for him.  I have heard so many times about drugging our children.  All I have done is make a troubled, hyper anxious kid become a normal happy kid with a ton of friends and great social skills.  His hearing is great.  On the other hand I have a daughter who is also ADHD.  This is apparently genetic.  My 2 nephews are also ADHD.  My
daughter has been screened very closely as she had cancer at 18 months.  She has profound hearing loss from the chemo and and IEP in place at school.  Did this help the ADHD come out.  We are not sure.  I have an older daughter that does not have any ADHD traits.  Ritalin and all other drugs are up to the individual but I know from experience what it feels like for people not to like your child becuase of his behaviour if they are  not medicated and so does he.  My nephew does not get medicated except for in shcool and I hate being around him and I blame his parents for that.  Having a great teacher also helps.  We have had one for my son for the last 2 years.  The will no longer put him in class with a female teacher.  Not knocking them but for some reason he listens better with a man.  Always take the time to find what works right for your kids.  It takes alot of time and patience and appts but when I see him on the ball field or playing hockey with that smile that seems to win every one over, I know it is worth it seeing him with the patience to play through the whole game without acting out somehow. Sorry for the long post but over the years I have heard so much and taken so much critism for drugging my kids.

[KBR33]

I can not believe I came across this post. It felt like I was reading my own letter. My five year old daughter is going through the exact same situation, right down to the marbles and behavior chart.

I was online tonight researching ADD and ADHD in relation to my daughters behavior patterns. I am desparately searching for alternative solutions to diagnosis and medication. All of my meetings with school officials have been leaning in this direction.

One thing I have found is that almost every site I come across has pointed out relationships or misdiagnosis due to hearing loss. During my daughter's regular annual physical, our physician noticed fluid build up in her ears. Since then, she has been tested and found to have a significant hearing loss.

Our appointment with the ear specialist is next week. In all honesty, I hope the hearing loss can be corrected by vacating the fluid and the behavior improves significantly as a result.

[annie22222]

I posted a comment on another page, and I'm basically having similar issues.  My concern was that he would be labled a trouble-maker by other parents.  Some research I have done has indicated that children with mild hearing loss will exhibit the same characteristics as ADD/ADHD.  My son does have a mild hearing loss... but I still don't have the school's support in regards to an IEP (or 504 identification).  Have you had his hearing checked?  I hear from so many parents that their boys are having trouble in kindergarten... I don't know what "NORMAL" is.  I have my son on a behavior chart too... but, because the school doesn't make needed modifications, I'm not sure how to give him consequeces.  I know it's killing my family to check his chart each day.  I'd love my happy go lucky child back.  If you are concerned that he is "hyper"... then you should start with the doctor.  I think that schools need to make modifications so that students will feel good about themselves, and want to do their best. (I'm a fifth grade teacher, and eventhough I have my standards, the kids need to feel like they can succede.)  I'm not sure this helped... but, at least your not alone.

[kenziesmom]

I am a special education teacher.  Your son definitely sounds as though he has a sensory disorder.  I agree that you should look into getting him tested.  Have you discussed your concerns with his pediatrician?  ADHD is diagnosed by a doctor, but they will ask for imput from you and his teacher(s).  I agree 100% with the previous poster who commented on watching his diet.  Does he consume a lot of red dye?  You'd be surprised how many foods contain this wicked ingredient that has been linked directly to ADD/ADHD.  Personally, I believe in using drugs as a last resort, especially at such a young age.  I work in a middle school and encounter a lot of kids who fall apart if they forget to take their pill.  Medication can be helpful, don't get me wrong.  I just believe children need to learn coping skills, so they don't rely solely on a pill.
My best to you.  Let us know how you make out.

[pixijal]

I agree the drugs are scary, but this little man needs to get a fair chance in life.  His behavior is now acceptable, but when peers realize he is not the same as them, he could very likely be an outcast by 3rd grade.  

I don't know where you live, but if you are in America, you must get an I.E.P.  Idividualized education plan.  He would have to see a child physciatrist, and would be tested including an IQ test.  Then, the school board will review his results and a personalized education plan would be made for him.  It would focus on issues like the shirt chewing, behavior problems.  He obviously doesn't have speech problems.  Probably just ADHD, but that sometimes can be severe.  The bottom line is:  You will not be able to help him if he is not properly diagnosed.  I highly suggest you get him evaluted...and he is a more common situation than you may think!  

My sister has a now 6 year old that was a terror from the time he could crawl at 7 months. He is now medicated, and is finally manageable.  She was very against medication, and her husband was too.  The only problem is that when Joseph started 1st grade, he didn't stand a chance.  They had to turn his desk backwards to keep his hand out of it, and he couldn't complete a task to save his life.  In additon, he had behaivor problems.  He was sooooo bored, that he would have to do really crazy things to keep himself stimulated.  He is constantly searching for stimulation, and the medication has given him a chance.  He can sit and listen, concentrate, and respond appropriately.

Frequently, especially with 1st born children, a problem is recognized in kindergarden.  Academics are not important THIS YEAR, but they will be NEXT YEAR, as the cirriculum taught will be the base for 2nd grade.  Getting into a dr. and having evalutions done is a LENGTHY process that should be done soon so that your little guy is ready for first grade!

**Good Luck**

[anxiousmomtobe?]

Try a super healthy diet, no refined sugars, artificial colours, food additives.  I have a friend who was able to deal with her son's add this way.

As well, he should have further medical testing, not just meet with a behaviour specialist.  Some food allergies cause this behaviour in kids

I agree the drugs are scary.  If all the experts recommend them, do a blind drug study over 2 months.  The drs will ask you, the teacher and your son to record how each day goes.  That way they can find the minimum dose that enables your son to function.

Good luck.  Hang in there, he may just grow out of this stage on his own.  I think you are doing a great job.