My 5 year old daughter lovette is out of control

[Nikkihaskins]

My 5 yr old daughter is out of control. When I ask her not to do things and explain why she can

[mommie30]

I have a 5 almost 6 year old who sounds just like yours, except for the bedtime stuff. She is very disrespectful toward me she will make a mess in hers and her sisters bedroom and when I ask her to clean up before bed she will yell at me and say " I did not do it" but my other daughter who is 7 is very clean and always cleans up her messes and I have had to stop her from cleaning up after her sister. When I tell my 5 year old no she says she hates me and I am mean and she don't ever want to talk to me agian. But after she has calmed herself down from her fits she comes to me and says mom I love you can I have this or that or she asks if she can do something special like play a game on my computer and I have to tell her no and the fit and disrespectful talk starts all over. She has broke alot of her toys and wrote all over her bedroom walls and one time she even kicked the wall so hard she put a hole in it. I am at a lose I have taken all her toys and special privileges away from her and nothing has worked. When she is good she is an angel but when she is bad she is like a evil little girl. I never tell her this I always use kind words when talking to her even when she is being naughty.

[leelee345]

my 6 year old daughter is out of control, please help me::::: she is constant trantums and crying when she doesnt get wat she wants she screams the loudest she can,,, ud swear some1 was beating her its terrible... when i put her 2 her room for being naughty she lifts everything in her room and breaks it r throws iit at the door.. she will then open the bedroom door and call me stupid, dummy, very bad lanugage and anything else she can think of.... bedtime is a nitemare she screams and screams til eventually shel fall over which is usally round 10 r so... getting her up for school the next day is a nitemare... im constanly tiread cant get anything in the house done beacuse im constantly punshing her for her behaviour.... she asks for sweets all the time and wont eat proper food.. she hits her brother (2 1/2 years) all the time.. he has started 2 copy things that she does. i cant control them HELP!!!!

[melanie1963]

Your comments were sent a while ago and I was wondering how you're getting on. I have a 5 year old and she's out of control. I also have a 18 year old who's about to start university and was a joy to bring up. Francesca is 'different'   she lies, when you tell her gently that you know she's lying, she doesn't blush and say sorry, she continues with the lie. She drags out bedtime. She screams all the time. She has little respect for me. To be honest, I rarely enjoy her company. Help!

[Nikkihaskins]

Well we have been doing really good the last few weeks.  She seemed to be getting better and better.  She loves being around other kids so we met the parents nexted store and Lovette has been playing in their yard.  I have there phone number and they have ours.  Today we had a big problem.  Instead of coming home after playing next door she went and walked into the house 2 houses down!!!  A man brought her back and told me she walked into his house.  She told him she was going to keep walking into houses until she found a new friend.  OMG  what I'm I going to do with her?

[Christy H]

My thoughts are with you. Good luck!
Christy ;)

[Nikkihaskins]

What hasn't happened.  Her grandfather just died.  She just had a little brother 2 months.  We moved from the inner city to the counrty.  She changed schools after the move.  Her grandmother is sick with the same thing her grandfather died from.  But I'm trying all your seg.  Thank you all for your help.

[Christy H]

Has there been a serious family issue? (e.i. death of a loved one, divorce, a move to a new house or school, new brother or sister, an illness with her or other family member).The I ask this is it sounds like to me that she is reacting to a change in her enviroment and seeing how far she can go. I would start with for example if she refuses to comply with moving the glass and you take it away after asking usually I will ask three times after the third you take the object away and if she throws a tantrum I would remove from the area and take to a quite and safe place maybe the bedroom. I would calmly tell her that she will be allowed to return to the table as soon as she calms down because the way she is acting is not appropriete for the table. Please bear in mind that she will throw a bigger tuntrum but be strong and consistant. Once she calms down, if hse is able to do that on her own, allow she to return to the table. If she is not able to calm down on her own and the tantrum increases, try sitting in her room with her and either hold her or rub her back. If that does not work try asking to help you with a chore to redirect her. As far as entering a store i would giving her " a job" to do while you are in the store like I need you to look for the brocoli and once she completed that task have her look another item the trick is to keep her busy! I know that this is a lot for you to do but if you just keep with it, it will get better !
Let me know how you fair and good luck!
Christy;)    

[Trialanderror]

Quite clearly she is looking for boundaries and I fully agree with the methods of the other posters for you to take the lead again. It often happens that with well -meaning explanations towards a child the child becomes argumentative and has the impression when things are discussed, the issue is up for negotiation. You can practice putting your foot down in areas that are indeed really important to you or the sake and safety of your daughter. While you are doing the transition, make sure there are plenty of moments when she can be in charge otherwise of projects and chores. Possibly she also just needs some more hugs since the new baby arrived. Just speculation. Even if it is hard now, make sure you do not lose your authority completely. Good luck.

[RockRose]

This one line struck me:


"She is very disrespectful. Anything she asks for is a demand. She yells at me to get her things NOW. If I don