My 5 years old girl has been telling me 5 times now that she wants to die. Does she need medical attention?

[cecile228]

My 5 years old girl has been telling me (twice this week) that she wants to die. The first time she told me that (3 month ago) I thought it was just a way to get attention. I told her to stop saying that.  The following time she told me she wanted to die I reminded her of all the good things in life that she likes and that she would miss. I told her that it was not her time to die.
When I ask her why she wants to die she answer that she doesn't like herself, that she doesn't want to have wrinkles, that she doesn't want to have any "boo-boo".
She is usually a really happy little girl, singing, playing, enjoying life, she is doing great in school, like her gymnastic and swimming classes...
The other concern I have with her is her anger: she can get really angry (she hates loosing in a game) or she even sent a rock on her older sister (8 years old)
The last time she told me she wanted to die I told her that it was not normal and that she could see a doctor . Now she is asking me to see one.  
Should I see a child psychiatrist? Am I over reacting?

[cecile228]

First of all, thank you for your inputs.
Secondly, where do you find the energy to raise 9 children?!
Finally, you are right about the relation between my 2 girls. Especially lately, my youngest really don't want anything to do with my oldest. I have noticed that my older daughter is not "tender" at all with my youngest.  I had to speak to her several times this week about it.  It is also true that my youngest is much relaxed when there is not her older daughter around. What are your suggestions to make peace between them?
Do you think that is why she wants to die?

[Cliffhanger884]

Wanting to die coming from a 5 year old girl could be construed several ways. Its important to get more information before determining which course of action should be taken. One piece of information you have supplied is how she gets angry by losing and another is she has an 8 year old sister.

One of the greatest mistakes parents make is not placing the significance siblings have on the behavioral effects between children within the family. I have 9 children, 5 boys & 4 girls, and I've seen virtually every combination children can have on each other imaginable. Your 8 year old, up until her age to drive a car, is always going to be superior to the younger 5 year old. In games the 5 year old gets beat all the time. Also in order to make the game more fun she may delibertly allow the 5 year old to almost win and then beats her in the end.

I challenge you to do one thing. Rule in or rule out your 8 year old as the underlying cause of your 5 years olds apathy. Be thankfull the 5 year old gets angry, thats actually a good sign. It's when she doesn't is when your problem just went to the next level. Your 5 year olds mental health and $200.00 per hour in cost plus much time and upset is at stake. For a few hundred dollars, or even a thousand have a company come in and set up several vidio camera's. Don't let your children know. Then let the children do as they normally do. It may only take seeing and hearing them alone for five minutes that will give you all the information you need to solve your problem. It may take several days of vidio before you get your answer.

You may be shocked at what you discover or very happy. Sure it may sound like an invasion of their privacy-so what-it's not only the health safety and welfare of your child at stake its also your families happiness all the way through college, their marriages and your grandchildrens as well. Lastly, doing everything you can to raise your children the best you know how leaves you in the retirement years with no regrets-not doing everything you can-does leave you with regrets which only leads to denial and shifting the blame. Your already on the right track, your asking and are aware something is wrong. Stay on this track until YOU-not a stranger or a doctor offers you an answer-get your own truth no one is closer to it than you are. Good luck

[althepal39]

I dont' think you're over reacting.  I'd bring her to a doctor.  She sounds like a very deep thinker - she is probably very intelligent - but she probably just needs someone to help her with any negative emotions or thoughts she may be having.  That's what psychiatrists are for.  Good luck - I hope it helps.