I want to enjoy my five year old!!

[Stacey1271]

My 51/2 year old daughter has always been "spirited". Lot's of changes have happened in her life over the last two years since her father and I split up.  We have joint custody and divide the time equally. Her dad is a great father.  My 9 yr old son and her transition nicely from each home.  My daughter has become VERY aggressive, extremely emotional, physically and emotionally abusive towards me and her brother and is just not a pleasant person to be around alot of the time. She is very difficult to control when I don't allow her what she wants.  She'll repeat herself over and over, tantruming, screaming & pushing to try and get her way. I'm not the kind of parent that "just gives in" but since these outbursts happen so frequently I pick my battles. She is VERY defensive and quick to be mean.  Her teachers don't see these negitave behaviors and her dad does see some degree of acting out but nothing like what happens in my home.  We just began seeing a social worker since I REALLY am at my breaking point. I need help and I need to enjoy my daughter.

[specialmom]

I agree.  Actually it was jdtm that posted one time something that stuck with me.  She said that kids often are the hardest on those they are closest to (or something like that).  Perhaps your daughter is struggling more than you think and expressing it when she is in the safe harbor of your home.  I don't know, but just a thought.

Good luck.  It is hard to manage it all and figure out the best route for our kids.  Hang in there, you'll find your way.

[jdtm]

My 9 yr old son and her transition nicely from each home.  --  your words

Are you sure your daughter is "transitioning nicely"?  Just wondering ....