10 year old boy still sleeps in mom's bed.

[primo406]

Not really sure where to post this. Relationship? Child development?. I recently started to see a woman that I am quite fond of. It's going on a few months now. Something I find odd, is that she sometimes invites me over after 10:30, and I assume that her child is asleep in his room, and that we will be sharing adult tiime. When I arrive, I find that her 10 year old son is asleep on the sofa in the den. (She wants us all to lay together) I am not comfortable being intimate (not sex) while next to a sleeping 10 year old boy. I have also learned that they sleep together in her bed every night even though he has a beautiful room. If feels wierd to me that they go up to bed together as husband and wife would....and am not sure where I fit into this equation....or perhaps I don't???  When I mentioned this to her, she was quite distressed, and torn, and I believe is making it some sort of unhealthy competition which I will not partake in. I believe the child, having a bed time, and sleeping in his own room is most healthy for all concerened. Not only for the child, but for our relationship as well. Am I off base?

[allmymarbles]

No, you are not off base. The whole business is quirky.

[AnnieBrooke]

A boy that age needs a distinct bedtime and to be getting into his own bed, room and space.  However, if you have recently started to see someone, you don't have the right to tell her what she should be doing.  Suggest what you like, it is her decision, and all you really can do is give that as a reason for leaving if you decide to leave.  She might listen then.

[razeberryrain582]

no ur rite the child should sleep in his own rm not with his mom its unhealthy 4 any kid of a certain age 2 keep sleeping with any parent maybe u can ask her 2  talk 2 someone

[OldFatChick]

NO. You are not off base.  A 10 year old boy should not be sleeping with mom. Especially when she has a male companion over.  Not a good idea at all and I am not surprised you would find it odd.  Mom has issues and if the boy doesn't start sleeping in his room soon, he will have issues, as well.