Twin boys and strange anxiety

Hi,

I have twin boys who will be 5 year old in April. They were born premature and they had some very minor development delays (Speech came in late). They have been going to day care since they were 2.5. In the beginning when they cried at drop off, everyone thought that it was okay and they will eventually calm down. They did calm down and started getting settled in the first day care that they went to. One day the school had a fire drill and the kids got scared of the noise. The teacher was extra strict so that did not hep either. The crying came back and I moved them to another school. They cried at drop off and eventually got settled in the class 5 minutes after I left. Slowly they transitioned to the 4 year old program, but the crying stayed. Every drop off they cried for about 5 minutes. We learnt to ignore it and move on with our days. Sept 2012 they started a new school in a PreK program and the crying came back in a very big way. Now the kids started getting scared of going to Birthday Parties, they got scared in the classes (music and soccer) that they went to. It just gt worse with every passing day. I talked with the teacher and they told me that the kids are very passive in the class and are not getting involved in any of the class activities. I will be moving them to the Public school (currently they are in a Private school) this year. But it is heart breaking to see them how they are getting scared of strange places. They are scared of Birthday Parties, but other wise they are extremely social kids. They have a lot of friends and love going to the park. They love cycling around our community and they love play dates. But if I have to take them to a music class and drop them and leave, they would cry their lungs out. If I leave them with my parents, they would happily wave bye bye. They would not want to stay alone in a room (they share a room) too. Any idea what is going on ?

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this.

Regards.
SM.

[PassinThru]

I wonder if you have a unique twin problem. Would it help to have them go places alone, one without the other?

[specialmom]

Hi there.  I feel for ya.  my dear friend had twins at 24 weeks gestation!  Premature twins are a lot of work!!

I'm wondered if you've ever sought out information on sensory integration disorder?  My son has this and things like loud noises and parties are automatic triggers.  Basically it involves how the nervous system process things.  My son has other issues related to sensory including fine motor trouble, etc.  

I'm wondering if you don't have some sensory issues going on which is common in premature kiddos.  Lots of things you can do to help if you are interested in investigating this further.  

[SandsM]

Right now because the school does not have two separate class rooms, the boys cannot be separated. I did ask the teacher. I am curious about the sensory integration issue, one of the boys did dislike lotions as a baby but then eventually he grew out of it. I would love to rule that possibility out or work on it, if that is an issue.  How do I find out ?
He does go to the playground and they have visited Theme parks like Sesame Place, Hersheys, Disney with us. After the initial reluctance, they got used to the place. One of my boys loves roller coasters .. (not sure if all this information is relevant but just sharing). Every evening they promise not to cry but then every morning sending them to school becomes a huge battle !!

[SandsM]

Right now because the school does not have two separate class rooms, the boys cannot be separated. I did ask the teacher. I am curious about the sensory integration issue, one of the boys did dislike lotions as a baby but then eventually he grew out of it. I would love to rule that possibility out or work on it, if that is an issue.  How do I find out ?
He does go to the playground and they have visited Theme parks like Sesame Place, Hersheys, Disney with us. After the initial reluctance, they got used to the place. One of my boys loves roller coasters .. (not sure if all this information is relevant but just sharing). Every evening they promise not to cry but then every morning sending them to school becomes a huge battle !!