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Am I father to the child?
Am I the father of the child? My girlfriend got pregnant. We had an intercourse only on two occasions (because I was away from home) in Jan. 05, 2014 and in Feb 14, 2014. She never told me anything just till March 03.2014 when she presented her Ultrasonography result from that day: It stated that the fetus(bubble) is 12mm of diameter, GA(AUA) 5w, EDD(AUA) - 01 Nov 2014. I asked her to repeat the ultrasonography in a different clinic to confirm the result. Two days later 03.05.2014 she got the following results: GA(AUA) - 5w6d, EDD( AUA) - 30.10.2014, while she insisted her LMP was 28.12.2013, as a result GA(LMP) - 9w4d, EDD(LMP) - 04.10.2014, CRL(Hadlock) 0.28 cm, YS - 0.41 cm. As you can see there is a discrepancy between the LMP results and AUA results of 4 weeks. Is that even possible? She told me her period was irregular but then denied it. We had "trust" issues some time ago, as she told me she want's to have an open reationship with me exactly in the time between our two intercourses. She is acting very weird, and this even worsens my concerns. Please help!
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COMMUNITY LEADER
I do not think she misled the doctor, but that probably she said something like, "Gee, my last period was actually ___ date," and the doctor said, "But look, if we were to compute from your last period, as you can see here your pregnancy would be 9 weeks along, as I can show you with this computation, and you're actually in your fifth week." And the (hypothetical) computation got printed at the bottom of the ultrasound.
The reason I don't think she lied to the doctor about when the period was, is that she really could have had a last period a long time before her next ovulation. Please get clear that the last period means nothing about when the next ovulation will be. The ovulation is the first event. Then a period comes if the woman is not pregnant. Then the body rests. When it feels up to it, it ovulates again, which is followed by a period. You are acting like you think that the last period somehow proves something about the timing of the ovulation, but it is the other way around, the last ovulation leads into the next period. Especially if a woman has irregular cycles, she can go many weeks between ovulations. But her next period (after ovulating) will always follow the ovulation by two weeks.
Anyway, she had two ultrasounds in a row that say she was in her fifth week. It sounds like all the 9th-week stuff is just hypothetical. Go with her to the next ultrasound, especially if she has it soon, and get the estimated due date. Try to relax, there is a chance she did have sex with someone else and get pregnant before the 14th, but you can't know that now. Time will sort this out.
The reason I don't think she lied to the doctor about when the period was, is that she really could have had a last period a long time before her next ovulation. Please get clear that the last period means nothing about when the next ovulation will be. The ovulation is the first event. Then a period comes if the woman is not pregnant. Then the body rests. When it feels up to it, it ovulates again, which is followed by a period. You are acting like you think that the last period somehow proves something about the timing of the ovulation, but it is the other way around, the last ovulation leads into the next period. Especially if a woman has irregular cycles, she can go many weeks between ovulations. But her next period (after ovulating) will always follow the ovulation by two weeks.
Anyway, she had two ultrasounds in a row that say she was in her fifth week. It sounds like all the 9th-week stuff is just hypothetical. Go with her to the next ultrasound, especially if she has it soon, and get the estimated due date. Try to relax, there is a chance she did have sex with someone else and get pregnant before the 14th, but you can't know that now. Time will sort this out.
None of the data I provided is my extrapolation. These are all results of the ultrasonography which I have received from the doctor. That's why I would like to know, why is there such inconsequence in the results. I'm no specialist, but I suppose that te result GA(LMP) - 9w4d, EDD(LMP) - 04.10.2014, was obtained based on the last day of the Last menstrual period LMP (28.12.2013 ) given by my girlfriend to the doctor, who based on this calculated the estimated GA - 9w4d. But since ultrasonography estimates are probably more precise I think my girlfriend got her LMP wrong or she misled the doctor on purpose...
COMMUNITY LEADER
In other words, if a doctor or tech said she was 5 weeks 6 days along on March 5, it does not matter what YOU said on the 5th of March. Please clarify what of this was actually said by the doctor based on the baby's measurements.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Right, and that second one says: "the following results: GA(AUA) - 5w6d."
But then later, you said "The data I provided (GA(LMP) - 9w4d, EDD(LMP) - 04.10.2014, CRL(Hadlock) 0.28 cm, YS - 0.41 cm ) comes from the second ultrasound done on the fifth of March 2014."
So, what I am asking, is how did the same ultrasound on the same day inform you that she was at 5 weeks 6 days, AND at 9 weeks 4 days? I was asking if the later one (the 9 weeks 4 days version) was some kind of extrapolation of yours just based on a mythical due date because of when her last period was.
But then later, you said "The data I provided (GA(LMP) - 9w4d, EDD(LMP) - 04.10.2014, CRL(Hadlock) 0.28 cm, YS - 0.41 cm ) comes from the second ultrasound done on the fifth of March 2014."
So, what I am asking, is how did the same ultrasound on the same day inform you that she was at 5 weeks 6 days, AND at 9 weeks 4 days? I was asking if the later one (the 9 weeks 4 days version) was some kind of extrapolation of yours just based on a mythical due date because of when her last period was.
Results of I Ultrasonography (03.03.2014)
GA(AUA) 5w,
EDD(AUA) - 01 Nov 2014
fetus(bubble) of 12mm in diameter
Results of II Ultrasonography (05.03.2014)
GA(AUA) - 5w6d,
EDD( AUA) - 30.10.2014
LMP was 28.12.2013
GA(LMP) - 9w4d,
EDD(LMP) - 04.10.2014,
CRL(Hadlock) 0.28 cm,
YS - 0.41 cm.
My concern is that according to the calculators (as we had sex on 05 Jan. 2014 and 14 Feb 2014), it is unlikely that I'm the father
GA(AUA) 5w,
EDD(AUA) - 01 Nov 2014
fetus(bubble) of 12mm in diameter
Results of II Ultrasonography (05.03.2014)
GA(AUA) - 5w6d,
EDD( AUA) - 30.10.2014
LMP was 28.12.2013
GA(LMP) - 9w4d,
EDD(LMP) - 04.10.2014,
CRL(Hadlock) 0.28 cm,
YS - 0.41 cm.
My concern is that according to the calculators (as we had sex on 05 Jan. 2014 and 14 Feb 2014), it is unlikely that I'm the father
What I meant is that she took a second ultrasonography. The first was taken on 03.03.2014 and two days later (05.03.2014) we went together to a different doctor for a ultrasonography test, because we thought it would be best to confirm the results.
COMMUNITY LEADER
When you said, "Two days later 03.05.2014 she got the following results: GA(AUA) - 5w6d, EDD( AUA) - 30.10.2014," what did you mean?
Thank you for your reply, it surely clarifies a bit. All data I provided is taken from the Ultrasonography results, from the actual report.
The data I provided (GA(LMP) - 9w4d, EDD(LMP) - 04.10.2014, CRL(Hadlock) 0.28 cm, YS - 0.41 cm ) comes from the second ultrasound done on the fifth of March 2014., and is based on the last day of period she evaluated 28.12.2013, (LMP - Am I right?)
The result from the first sonograph (03.03.2014) did not provide a day, only stated "5 Hbd" which I concluded were weeks in latin? I totally agree with you that it's a very very delicate matter and I'm having a hard time finding a good aproach, as she can get very easily irritated these last few days...
The data I provided (GA(LMP) - 9w4d, EDD(LMP) - 04.10.2014, CRL(Hadlock) 0.28 cm, YS - 0.41 cm ) comes from the second ultrasound done on the fifth of March 2014., and is based on the last day of period she evaluated 28.12.2013, (LMP - Am I right?)
The result from the first sonograph (03.03.2014) did not provide a day, only stated "5 Hbd" which I concluded were weeks in latin? I totally agree with you that it's a very very delicate matter and I'm having a hard time finding a good aproach, as she can get very easily irritated these last few days...
only way to know for sure is is to get bloods done when baby is born..she might of had intercourse with you around ovulation but who's to say she slept with another guy that same day. you girlfriend knows who shes slept with. if she hasn't slept with anyone baby is yours. need to really talk to her!!! :)
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A lot of women don't have their period on (the usual allowance of) exactly two weeks before ovulation. That is a medical margin built in, because many women ovulate two weeks after they have their period, but many do not. This is why, TRUST THE ULTRASOUND MEASUREMENT OF THE EMBRYO and not your speculations of what the ultrasound was "supposed" to say if her period was any indicator. Once the ultrasound sees and is able to measure the actual embryo, when her previous period actually came does not matter at all. A woman could have had her last period fifteen weeks before her next ovulation, or two weeks, or one week. This plays heck with the medical assumptions of two weeks from period to ovulation, but it happens.
When a woman has early ultrasounds, 5 weeks 0 days is a trifle early for use in determining conception because an embryo is hard to measure that early. But 5 weeks 6 days is a better time for measuring the embryo. (6 weeks 6 days would be even better, lots of markers are visible by then.) I would count on the 5w6d ultrasound and not on speculation about whether or not her period came at the average time before ovulation, when trying to decide what is going on.
In essence, the numbers to work from are the numbers given to her at her ultrasound(s). The one from March 5 that said she is 5 weeks 6 days GA gives the following:
Probable date of ovulation: February 6
Possible dates of conception: February 2 to 10
Due date: October 30, 2014 (40 weeks)
The one from March 3 that said she is 5 weeks and [you don't say how many] days gives the following:
Probable date of ovulation: February 8
Possible dates of conception: February 4 to February 12
Due date: November 1 (40 weeks)
Early ultrasounds are pretty accurate, though as I said there is such a thing as too early (because the embryo is too hard to see clearly). I tend to trust 6th-week and 7th-week ultrasounds a bit more than 5th-week ultrasounds (or 8th-week ones, for that matter, since babies' different growth rates make it necessary to allow a margin of several days by the time the eighth week rolls around).
If she would stand for it, I'd ask her to get one more ultrasound next week, and ask her for the report. It sounds like the child could be from you, but it does not sound as likely as if things were ringing up with a slightly later time frame. Problem is that the margins are almost too close to say that.
When you talk to her, remember that anything you say now, you might have to eat when the DNA test comes in, since there is still a chance that the February 14 event produced the baby. However, you are definitely in your rights to talk about DNA tests and "if" the baby proves to be yours. The more matter-of-fact you are and the less emotional or blamey, the better. Don't make this into a pregnancy scare starring you as Drama King, or she will NEVER tell you the truth. Be empathetic, if the baby is not yours she has something she really, really doesn't want to tell you, and that is not the easiest spot to be in. (If you don't believe me, read some of the stress-laden posts from women on the DNA/Paternity forum.)
A DNA test is definitely the way to go. I hope everything gets clarified in the meantime.