Hello everyone please help me with your opinions , tell me if I’m crazy or not

[jazminecasas0322]

I had sex March 14th  with Guy A , which was on the second or third day of my period,  (condom on, he didn’t get to ejaculate cause I was uncomfortable and we just had to stop after a few seconds) , moving forward I have old texts that I might have had my period April 11th or 12th but I don’t remember vividly but I know that if I didn’t get my period and this is around the time I got back with my boyfriend I would’ve been freaking out , but I do remember taking a test April 10th and it was negative, but in April I had sex with my boyfriend in the last week forsure (don’t remember other days in April but we didn’t have sex in March at all either ) which I was ovulating (24-29th or so) but we did it the day before and on my ovulation day forsure, then in May I took a pregnancy test 7th and 11th and those came out negative , until may 14th and I got my positive pregnancy test. So I’m due January 16th, may 15th I was in the ER And they couldn’t even see anything yet , so 4 weeks , and may 26th I had a dating scan and I was 6 weeks . June 9th I was 7 weeks and 6 days , also I talked to my doctor and she said there’s no way possible because the dating scan would’ve been 4-5 weeks off , so 4-5 more weeks than what I am, so as of right now I’m 18 weeks and right now I would’ve been 22-23 weeks, my doctor said it’s impossible and also 3 other nurses I spoke to at the doctors office ,  also got a dna test with the other dude and it’s 0.00% FROM DDC and I been seeing mixed things , good results and some girls saying theirs was inaccurate so now I’m scared all over again. At this point with me not remembering exactly what day I had my period in April, would it matter ?? cause the only day I had sex in March was the 14th on my period , I didn’t have any sex around my fertile or ovulation window in March , which doctors go based off last period cause you normally conceive two weeks after your period and everything which I had no intercourse around that time, so if I conceived that day I would be 6 more weeks than I am today. (I’m 18 weeks, would be 24 weeks if March).that would be the baby being 6 weeks behind or 4 -5 weeks behind and my baby is healthy . My due date would’ve been either December 5th the day I had sex or December 17th going based off my period in March, but my due date is January 16th.

[AnnieBrooke]

You're not pregnant from the guy on March 14. You've asked nurses and doctors, and all you're doing is ignoring what they say in order to ruminate over the question all over again. Try to stop wasting your emotional energy this way. See a counselor if you can't.

Medical anxiety is a bear. People beg for reassurance and freak out anew and beg for more reassurance and freak out all over again, because what they are worried about is really not the medical question but a different question. They're displacing some other, more difficult-to-face anxiety onto a medical concern that isn't real, but it's easier to face. By now, you should be able to see that the question you keep asking medical professionals and DNA labs is a straw-man issue (a fake concern). Someone you had brief protected sex with weeks too early is not the dad.

There are a lot of reasons women on this site write in with unfounded worries about paternity. I don't know what yours is, but here's a list of the kind of things that trigger this sort of obsession, that we've often discussed on this site. Women write in with false paternity worries for a lot of reasons, including:
- They feel guilt or shame because they were in a relationship with one person and had sex with someone else.
- They catastrophize the consequences ("If my partner found out I had sex with someone else, my whole life will end") even if it's not true.
- They fear they won't have enough money, and that the guy who is the dad won't stick around and support them and the child.
- They worry they won't be a good mother, or don't want to be a mom, and feel ashamed about that.
- They wish the other guy were the father and not the guy who is. (Closely related: they might not like their boyfriend much but not want to admit it.)
- The devout might feel God will punish them for being unmarried and having sex.
- They are ashamed of being unmarried and pregnant.
- They can't see any way to take care of the baby besides by pleasing the father, but that is shaky.

As you can see, a lot of those reasons are deep-seated fears, sometimes very hard to solve, and feature either guilt or anxiety about the world not being quite what the woman would want it to be for her to bring a child into it. The brain hates being in constant anxiety, so settles on a worry that might not have any basis in fact, but at least it doesn't require facing issues that are hard to figure out. Unfortunately, getting an answer about paternity doesn't help, because that question didn't really cause the distress in the first place.

Address your real concerns, possibly with a counselor if they are too hard to figure out alone, and your unfounded worries about paternity will fade away.

[jazminecasas0322]

Every time I have my reassurance I get this fear of WOULD IF, my boyfriend just went to the army a week ago, to provide for me and the baby, and I just keep thinking would if he’s doing this and then I give birth, and it’s not his or something crazy, that’s the main thing that keeps popping up in my mind, every time he did something nice or sweet it would pop up in my head again , then I go to google and start researching , and I seen sometimes it can be off by 4 weeks after my doctor told me no so now I’m confused and I wanted some medical reassurance from someone else like I seen in previous posts , my boyfriend and I have been through so much, he has a big history of cheating , doing things behind my back , I never did anything for years up until March and we were broken up . So I’m just not sure , and it’s so frustrating I just want to enjoy this pregnacy

[AnnieBrooke]

Honey, you don't have a problem with who the daddy is, you have a problem with it being a guy who was cheating and doing things behind your back, and it's coming out in this form. The worry you think you have (paternity) is not real, but the worry you have is real. See a counselor if you can, it will help a lot with the general worry.

[AnnieBrooke]

I really mean it. When I miscarried, my ob/gyn sent me to talk with a social worker who provided grief help that was associated with their practice and knew a lot about women's issues. It helped so much. Please consider finding someone to talk to.

[jazminecasas0322]

So besides me going crazy, you wouldn’t think there would be any possible way of March happening just based off of my scans that I had

March 12: Start of period
March 14th: had sex with guy 1 ( protected , no ejaculation because of me wanted to 1 minute in )
March 24-30 : fertile and ovulation window (no sex with guy or boyfriend )
April 11th :possible day of my LMP , I just don’t remember vividly (which is what started this, randomly thought while driving)
April23-28th ovulation and fertile window, boyfriend and I had sex, knowing there was some ejaculation inside
May 7: negative test
May 11:negative test
May 14th: positive test
May 15th: nothing to be found but thickening
May 25: 5 weeks 6 days
June 9: 7 weeks 6 days
July 10th: 12 weeks and 6 days

Thank you so much for responding and please just evaluate this just for some of my assurance; thank you I really appreciate it

[AnnieBrooke]

If you really thought you got pregnant from the sex March 14, the medical evidence would have soothed those worries long ago. But the evidence hasn't had that effect, which suggests you're worried about something else, not paternity. Until you address what you're really anxious about, you'll still be anxious. See a counselor and lay it out and try to figure out what is stressing you. Good luck!