Detox with out in-patient hospitalization

[HACKING MOM]

Hello,

So happy to have found this site and the offer of help.

LOONG story shortened...I've been addicted to opiates(started with loritabs,and norco,etc..),now on subutex. Been addicted for a little more then 3 years. Subutex or suboxone for 2 yrs. I've weaned down to 1 milligram a day of subutex. I started at 8mil. When I abused hydrocodone it was up to 20 or more pills a day..

This has been a huge challenge. A couple years ago I went cold turkey off pain meds....OH MY GOD!!! what a damn nightmare...Talk about no sleep and no support and some serious pain in the legs and my back and was just wanting to crawl out of my skin and DIE!!! I managed for 2 whole weeks like that, and still felt crappy, and aching, and nervous,etc...

What has made my journey especially difficult is the 'shame' I felt/feel. The 'secret', of wanting to remain that strong person everyone believes I am and was...My 16yr. old daughter and my husband who is in law enforcement, and he would speak 'low' of addicts. That was an extra embarrassment. At this time he is supportive but does not have a clue on how to relate or empathize with me. Our family Dr. has kept me on the 1 mil. of subutex for the last few months...I then tried to go off with out asking or telling(thought i'de surprise everyone) and I was the one in for a surprise...after 4 days...I was having pretty uncomfortable withdrawls(sub stays in body for quite a few days). My doctors office was closed over the weekend and I went to ER room and got 20 loritabs. That lasted me til Monday;and back to the doc. Now I'm on subutex AGAIN!!! I'm taking 1mil, a day. I want my old life back sooo bad. I'm willing to endure some discomfort,but hate to let my daughter see me sick all the time. I was an energetic person and athletic and 'bubbly'. Now I'm more isolated and scared to work because of the fact of just wanting to be drug free and set free from the physical dependancy. My doc is one in only 7 in my city that even can prescribe the medication. I thank god for him,but feel he'll let me stay on this for a loong time...

it's expensive and inconveniant. I want to know what sort of things i can do to slowly get off this(but within a month)..I do have plenty of xanax and sonoma sleeping pills and soma muscle relaxers; if these things can help! Does anyone else have a suggestion or a plan that worked for them? I'de appreciate any type of advice or support...THANKS!!! Also what to do for the extreme leg and back pain;and insomnia? I'm guessing there is nothing accept 'ride' it out...but GEEZ...I don't feel I can..the pain is unbearable!!

[ZR]

Hi,

I have done detox both in-house and at home over the last 6 years.  I walked out of one in-house one and finally did DETOX5 which puts you asleep for 5 days to sleep through the whole detox.  You feel like s**t when you come out but it worked.  You do need

[littleredlady]

Hi, I too, am very sorry that you are experiencing difficulties. I wanted to share my story with you so that hopefully it will shed some light on your situation. I was taking vicodin, hydrocodone,lorcets, quite frequently. I remember when I started this these pills were introduced to me by a so-called "friend". At the time I thought he was good friend of mine, I wasn't feeling to good that day and he came by an brought 5 vicodin es pills. I took 2 to start and realized, hey, this feels pretty good. And that's what kick-started everything. At the time I was still a full-time student working two jobs and after my illness passed, I began to take the pills more frequently after noticing the "boost," euphoric feeling that I received when taking the pills. Initially, I was taking two pills at a time per day, that would keep me "boosted"
for the entire day. Shortly, my addiction moved from two pills at a time to five pills at a time. As you can see it doesn't take long for the body to build a tolerance to this drug and you will soon need more and more pills to reach that "high" that you are seeking. As time passed I increased my intake of vicodins to 5 pills at a time a couple times a day, then 7 pills at time twice a day, then 10 pills at a time (10 7.5mg hydrocodone pills, then escalated to 10 10mg Lorcet tabs per consumption which was probably once per day and later and most recently increased to 2 and 3 times per day) When I began taking 10 pills at a time, I increased yet again to to sometimes 20 or 30 pills a day. It was then I knew that I was in danger and needed help. God intervened (I trully believe) and I was admitted to an outpatient rehab. It was only $60 for admission and $9 per day for your daily dosage of methadone. Since starting this program I have been able to have a normal life again. I can think clearly. This medication blocks all thoughts of the pills. However, this medication is highly addictive and from what I understand the WD is horrible, but it works so well for me you feel no pain whatsoever, everyone has mixed feelings about and thats okay because we are all entitled to our own opinions, I just wanted to share my experiences and tell you what has worked for me. I feel great, I am full of energy not depressed and have ZERO cravings for the pills, noone can tell that I am on it and so nobody knows it is discreet and private maybe you should talk with someone about. Feel free to contact me with any questions you may have. Hope I helped somebody.

[LaceyBug]

I have read through every comment made. What i have read scares me for those of you who do not know the truth. I have spoken with many doctors and my sister is a RN. I have actually became friends with a narconon supervisor. I would like to share with you what has been determined by repeated physicians. First of all, If you are a female you can pretty much throw out everything that any male has told you. It has been proven that women suffer twice as much and twice as long. This is because of a little hormone we possess called estrogen! So basically as it has been explained to me, a female actually experiances 3 different types of detox. For instance if you are female you have probably put serious thought into suicide, especially if you have had a child within the past year. Also most woman experience horrible periods when they begin to detox. (that is one thing that no man could ever understand. Then we also must endure the tipical effects of detox. I to have become an addict. It's funny how you can't pinpoint the exact day that you crosed over. I live in Beaumont, Texas so I beleive that the hurricane had to be my turning point. The experiance is something that is unexplainable unless you where there. I had just given birth a few days before, and my husband and i listened to our instructions and headed north. After standing in traffic for 12 hrs our mottor blew. I rember thinking how misserable I was( how verry stupid of me).I would love nothing more than to vent but I wont wast your time, i will get back to my point. Soon after we where brought to the shelter i began to feel something more from my daily dosage. I'm not sure if it was bad or good because it did numb me enough so that I did not spend my days crying over my baby girl. Since then, I slowly began to increase my dosage I didnt feel high so I thought it wasnt a problem. Eventually things settled down and one day as I held Emma I was overcome with the truth. That is when I became suicidal, I didnt deserve what GOD had blessed me with. I then decided no more, I really thought I could just stop!! That is when my eyes opened to a whole other world, anyone who has crossed knows what I meen, and if you dont, bow down and give thanks unto your savior!! I did as all of you have done. Trying different meds with no success. I finally met an angel, she new me before anything was said. (the view into the other world shows you your sisters and brothers) She approached me as if I had known her for years. She was clean, and yet she held back nothing. There are many tricks of the trade different things will work for different users. FIRST: TAPER DOWN SLOWLY, ZANEX HELPS, FOR SOME TRAZODONE. BUT DONT BE FOOLED AS I WAS, ONCE YOU FINALLY GET DOWN TO A DOSE OF 2 A DAY you start to believe that stopping will be easy. If you're like me I just couldnt part with the last two. Also remember not every one will get down that low. For me, I picked up my daghter and stood in front of the hall mirror. I felt as if I had betrayed her and that guilt alone got me through the afternoon. By 5:00 I made sure that i had taken my zanex. I stayed in that rut for several months. I did try many different meds, such as clonidine, zoloft, prozac, and several others. Not one of those meds was strong enough. I'm not sure why but I then called narcanon. God opened doors for me that day bringing true help. this is what I have now descovered: these meds are not meant to be used alone! They should be taken with other of these meds. For instance, each of these meds has a certain job. So if you sit and think about it, you do not only have one side effect. I was weary at first until I checked with my sister and she confirmed what I had been told before. Did you know that if you enter a detox center you are put on 3 to 5 different meds at the same time. This is what worked for me: Zoloft in the morning, clonidine throught the day (remember that you have to be sober before taking it or its being wasted), Some times I could hold out on my trazadones until later. sometimes it is better to just go ahead and take it before the evil thought start to creep into your brain. ( I would take 4 day of 50 mg) Then at night I took my librium. Amazingly Thing are actually alot easier. Another thing to consider is that if you choose to use ultrams you must be clean, yes ultrams do work, they are a partial agoinist, which means if your receptors are already full the ultram has no chance. Ultrams are not anything to be worried about. Methadone caries three times the risk, and gets you high. Pointless!!!!I also have an extensive list of other meds currently being used in detox facilities. Anyone who wants to look over the list just email me. And please I am begging those of you who do not get enough relief from the ones listed here, please dont give up there are still many more options! I do have one bit of bad knews though, specialist have confirmed that some addicts will be permanently disabled mentally, others will have flash backs for years, but some will walk away and never give thought to those beautiful evil green pearls! I hope that the information I have passed along will help. And if all else fells remeber: IN MAN NOTHING IS POSSIBLE, BUT IN JESUS CHRST THE SON OF MAN ALL THING ARE POSSIBLE. ASK AND YOU SHALL RECIEVE FOR JESUS IS BOUND BY HIS WORD.

[ex herion user 10years]

i have been on them and if u want any subitex emaill   me ***@****

[Scared_in_Georgia]

I am SO glad that I found this site and really hope that there is SOMEONE out there that can help me.  I am 29 and recently hurt my back, the weird thing is I had NO idea how I did this.  After a couple weeks of the pain getting worse and nothing over the counter helping me I went to the ER.  The pain was SO SO SO BAD that I had no choice, I couldn't even walk.  While there they did an MRI and found that I did have a serious injury and set me up with a back doctor for surgery.  He tried to put the surgery off and hoped that in time the injury would heal itself.  During the weeks of waiting he put me on Lortab 10mg and I was treating them like candy(they did nothing for the pain but did give a good buzz).  After not sleeping and hurting all of the time I went back and told him this just wasn't working, he then put me on percocet 10mg.  I am now taking 4 pills at one time and go through a bottle in 2 days.  I finally had surgery a month ago and the pain is still VERY BAD, not from the actual surgery but the same pain as before the surgery.  I am taking the pain meds to relieve the pain and they do VERY LITTLE, it just dulls it enough for me to get out of bed.  I know until my back is fixed I have to take them, they are all that helps but I also know that I am addicted to them and will soon be taken off.....THAT SCARES THE HELL OUT OF ME.  About a week ago I ran out of the percocet and spent a night in HELL!!!!  I had NO idea what was going on - I couldn't sleep, I hurt ALL over from my head to my toe, I was shaking, and wanted to die.  That was the worse feeling I have ever had in my life.  I am now SO scared to come off of this but so badly want a normal life.  If anyone was taking percocet and quit PLEASE PLEASE email me at ***@**** with what you did to get off without the bad withdrawals....I have no insurance so I cannot afford detox treatment.

Thank you SO much!!

Bridget

[HACKING MOM]

WOW!!
  IT IS SO NICE TO KNOW THAT PEOPLE ARE OUT THERE; AND THEY REALLY CARE. I APPRECIATE THE GOOD ADVICE AND 'DIRECTION'. FIRST OFF...THE COMMENT ABOUT JOINING OR TALKING WITH SOMEONE FROM A CHURCH...VERY COINCEDENTLY; I JUST JOINED A ON-LINE PRAYER GROUP/FORUM YESTERDAY. I'M A BIT SPIRITUAL;HOWEVER NOT AT ALL RELIGIOUS. BUT....I WANT TO FIND A HIGHER POWER OR 'MY' GOD;AND LET THAT LEAD ME AND GIVE ME STRENGTH.
SECOND..I AM ON A 'MAINTENANCE' PROGRAM WITH OUR FAMILY DOCTOR. THAT IS WHAT THE SUBUTEX IS FOR. I'VE COME A LONG WAY ALREADY;BUT I WANT TO BEAT THIS SOOO BAD. I HATE GOING TO THE DOC FOR THESE MEDS. OUR INSURANCE DOESN'T COVER THE MEDICATION AND IT'S VERY COSTLY. 2 WEEKS AGO(WHEN I THOUGHT I'DE WEANED DOWN LOW ENOUGH TO QUIT), I WENT 4 DAYS OR SO W/O SUBUTEX AND I FELT LIKE HELL...WHEN THE SUGGESTION TO DO YOGA AND EXCERCISE(HAVE BEEN TOLD THIS OFTEN)I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW I CAN...THE PAIN AND ACHES AND MENTAL ANGUISH I FEEL IS SO UNBEARABLE THAT I LAY THERE WITH THOUGHTS RACING THROUGH MY HEAD. I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T BE IN MY OWN SKIN!! I GET VERY DEPRESSED AND HAVE OUTBURST OF TEARS AND RAGE!! I DON'T EVEN WANT TO GO IN PUBLIC. MAYBE MY DOCTOR WILL WEAN ME DOWN TO A HALF MILIGRAM A DAY, AND THEN SLOWLY GET ME OFF THESE MEDS..
  I'M WORRIED CAUSE WE'RE MOVING TO CALIFORNIA NEXT MONTH, AND I WANTED TO START A FRESH NEW LIFE BY THE BEACH...THERE ARE VERY FEW DOCS THAT CAN EVEN PRESCRIBE THE MEDS I TAKE..IF I'M NOT OFF THESE IN A MONTH; THEN I'LL HAVE TO LOOK FOR A DOC IN CA. AND SPEND MORE TIME AND MONEY ON THIS ADDICTION!!
  THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE COMMENTS...ANY MORE THOUGHTS ARE APPRECIATED...

[cosyintherocket]

Hi, there is help out there for you, I promise.  Have you tried the library?  There are many helpful books on detoxing from all sorts of different medicines on your own.  Also, consult your family physician as he or she may be able to offer you a non-hospitalized route and walk you through it.

-Cori

[Roger Gould, M.D.]

I think you should consult a detox specialist because there are substitute medications that can bring you out of this slowly and less painfully. It doesn't have to be inpatient, but if there is an inpatient facility, a doctor there will be able to treat you as an outpatient.

[ABCMomof3]

Do you go to Church? Do you have a clergy that you could talk to? If not, then I suggest that you call a Church, any Church and speak with a pastor, minister, priest ect. You have no idea how much help they will be able to offer you. Not only will they counsel you and offer their help, but you will be in their prayers as well and they will ask members of their Church to pray for you too. If you have never been prayed for in this way before it's hard to describe the relief and benefits you will feel; when it happens to you, you will know what I mean.

I do believe its a good idea to get yourself to the dr's as soon as you can so they can give you the right meds to help you wean off the other meds. I don't think it's safe to do it cold turkey, but I DO believe in the power of prayer. Please call someone. You could even turn on the TV and watch one of the Christian evangelical shows; they always have phone numbers to call and have someone pray for you and with you and it doesn't cost anything.

But, please call someone. I hate knowing you are suffering like this. And I'm going to pray for you too.

[Carolina03]

HM,

Try yoga, breathing exercises and stretching for the body aches. My brother's friend took up running to help with his addictions. If I were you, I'd get on an exercise plan immediately. Your own endorphins are your best friend, not your doctor.

Thanks for your note on my post. I appreciate your candor. I'll be careful. I'm sorry you're going through so much agony!

Keep us posted.

Best,
C