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Male lack of pleasure, orgasm (but erection and ejaculation)
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Male lack of pleasure, orgasm (but erection and ejaculation)

Hello,

I'm a 25 year old male that first began sexual intercourse at age 17 (and masturbation before that, of course).  In any such instances of sexual activity (with or without a partner), I have been able to achieve erection, use that for a while, and then ejaculate.  However, there is no particularly pleasurable sensation to the activity, and definitely no orgasm.  I liken it to shaking hands with my penis - flesh on flesh, but nothing to get excited about.  Sex/masturbation has become an activity performed for one of two reasons:  1.  I have an erection that needs to be satisfied, 2. My partner needs to be satisfied.  In either case, once the erection is present, there is a need to ejaculate that drives me to/through the sexual or masturbatory act, but again, no real "pleasure," either during stimulation or during/after ejaculation.

Of course, I suspect a psychological basis for this, but I'm loathe to expose myself to the stigma of psychological care/diagnosis (and the associated records that will inevitibly be distributed, despite any assurances otherwise).  My questions are thus as follows:

1.  Is this likely to be psychologically based, or is possibly a medical condition?  If so, what is known about this type of thing?
2.  What resources are there for an individual (and perhaps his partner) to be able to work through this on his/their own?  I'm referring to books, primarily.

Thank-you.
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242532_tn?1269553979
Its most likely psychologically based.  The common dynamics to watch out for is a fear of being out of control, guilt about sexual pleasure, re-igniting half buried memories of traumatic experiences, like over hearing parental sexual intercourse when a young child, or other over-stimulating experiences that would cause you to put up a protective wall.

Regarding books, I can't be of much help, but big bookstores are you best bet.

I wouldn't be so afraid of psychotherapy if I were you. It is a good education in itself, and there is very little stigma these days, half of new york city is in therapy.  It could help a lot.
4 Comments
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Avatar_n_tn
i  find  it  good  to  take hrt  and finisteride i find  it  good to  lose interest in  sex,i  just want to be  impotent
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Avatar_n_tn
i  find  it  good  to  take hrt  and finisteride i find  it  good to  lose interest in  sex,i  just want to be  impotent
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Avatar_n_tn
you're gay.
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Avatar_n_tn
I have a problem with ocd masterbating (masturbating) and deprstion to I am trying to understand and am taking rx for it
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