behavior problem

[Tammy]

I am rasing a 5 year old that belongs to a friend of ours. She can be the sweetest little girl around when it is  just the two of us but when  she is around more  then one  person she  acts like she has no  self control. She talks so much that she can't control it. She runs around  making all kinds of noise and disturbing others. sometimes I  think  that she wants all the attention to be  on her but she is going about  getting the attention the wrong way. She is a very smart girl. She has been reading since the age of  4. She speaks 2 languages and writes very well. She is very creative in many ways. I just don't know how to get her bad behavior under control. Her parents split up 2 years ago and are still fighting every time  they speak to each  other. each puts  the other down to their daughter. she lives between 3 different  homes  but mostly she is with me. To her I am mommy. She causes problems in school with her constant talking. Can anyone give me some form of advice? Time outs, spankings, and being sent to bed don't work with her. I don't know where else to turn but if  I  don't get help for her soon her parents are going to  end  up sending her to live with her grandparents in a  third world country where she will be away from all of us plus  she will be deprived of the education that she really needs  to get anywhere in her life. Please help. Thanks

[Katherine]

Too often, these days, children who are simply acting out in an attempt to get guidance, discipline, and attention are being diagnosed and drugged just to keep them quiet and more easily managed.

Attention Deficit Disorder, actually, is quite rare.  However, Attention Defict Disorder in Adults and in parents who don't want to take the time necessary to raise and discipline children is quite common.

Before you put a child on drugs that may affect him/her for the rest of his/her life, take a look at what YOU, as the rearing parent or guardian are doing that should and MUST be corrected to help raise a child.  Clinical diagnoses take time.  Raising a child takes time and effort.  Putting a label on a child for the mere purposes of making life easier for the parent is easy, takes less time and much less effort.

So, do you say "NO, behave or you'll sit in the corner for a half hour," or do you just shove a pill in their mouths and go back to work after your lunch hour?

[HFHS.MD-AJ]

It must be difficult raising such an intelligent but disruptive young child. Her symptoms may be a reaction to her parents marital conflicts, or due to Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). You may find it helpful to arrange her evaluation by a child psychiatrist.

[A Parent]

It sounds like she needs to be evaluated for ADHD. My child acts the very same way and he was evaluated and diagnosed with ADHD. Good luck to you.