You both have a heavy load of anxiety, with a big dose of compulsivity to make it worse for you. There are two things you can do. You can take medications to slow you down( ask your doctor about klonopin) or you can get to the root of your anxiety by working with a therapist. It is hard to shrink yourself, but there are books and websites that can help you do that...
I'm the same way, and am looking for answers/responses to this. It's a heck of a way to live, went to cardiologists, physchiatrists 3-4 times a year who prescribes xanax .5 mg and xanax xr .5 mg. I've been taking only the xr since the summer and have felt lousy since then. My anxiety level is high, I'm racing all the time, depressed, hot/cold, etc. My memory stinks. It's scaring me. I put a call into my dr. I want to taper off the xanax, but what can I do about the racing? I've been on xanax for lots of years already. I'm sure I developed a tolerance. Is the racing related to the tolerance level of xanax or do I have other problems?