I've been depressed for a couplle years now since i was 11 amd i started getting bullied about m body im 13 now and m mother tells me (aka yells) that the only reason i cant make friends is being (the answers switch betweeen these every time) im too mature, fat, ugly, ect. The only people who know about my depression are my best friend and a guy who i am really close to and who i guess im dating they are both suffering from depression as well but not as bad as i am. ive come to hate myself, i started self harming, and began thinking about how death might not be so bad after all. I feel like my family hates me because they really act like it and i cant manage to believe it when people compliment me. I need help but i can't go to a counselor...