How to calm my nerves

I'm a seperated 35 year old, and i have been seperated for over a year and a half now. During my marriage i never once had an issue, but it tends to be an issue now. The last time this happen to me was when i was a teenager, and i don't remember how I broke out of the funk then. I have slept with a few women since, but have had trouble with my erections so i have used viagra and cialis. I have erections till it's time to take my pants off, then i loss my erections, and when i receive oral the same happens. How do i calm myself or my nerves enough to keep my erections? The girl i'm seeing now was hurt when we tried to have sex, but i couldn't perform, and i feel terrible about it. I do tend to have a high sex drive and I do masterbate alot, would that be an issue as well?

[palpateit]

The obvious answer is performance anxiety, but you already know that.

Question: Do you masturbate to Internet porn? If not then ignore the rest.
If so then it may be contributing to the problem.

Here's a simple comparison test to check for porn-induced ED:
1. Masturbate to your favorite porn.
2. Try to masturbate using no porn and no fantasy - only sensations. Masturbate with same speed and pressure as you would during intercourse.

Compare one and two. How erect was your penis? How long did it take you to reach orgasm? What was your level of excitement? A healthy young man should have no trouble attaining a full erection and masturbating to orgasm without porn or fantasy.
1. If you have a strong erection on #1, but problems on #2, then you have porn-induced ED.
2. If #2 is strong and solid, but you have trouble with a real partner, then you have anxiety induced ED
3. If you have problems during both 1 & 2, you may have severe porn-induced ED, or an organic problem. When in doubt, see a good urologist.

The following 2 links are to Medhelp threads on porn-induced ED. Read the stories. If you want to know more locate my first 2 posts on the link #1

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Mens-Health/22-with-porn-inducederectiledysfunction/show/469209?page=1

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Mens-Health/Too-much-porn-masturbationcause-ED/show/183203


On  GOOGLE VIDEO find  “Erectile Dysfunction And Porn” - watch the video series.

Here’s a Psychology Today article on it
Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction Is A Growing Problem
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201107/porn-induced-sexual-dysfunction-is-growing-problem

[DanRoss]

Thank you very much for the info, i will be looking into the for sure... That might be one of the issues, if not the only issue.

[DanRoss]

I'm going to start my no porn watching today, and hopefully I have some positive results.. I'm also going to try the deer exercise as well..