Emotionally drained - Am I at risk

[scardecat]

Not sure why I cannot say no. Had an encounter with a massage lady who ended up naked with me fingering her and her masturbating me. She was very wet and I believe she climaxed. I climaxed a few minutes later. I cannot say for certain if I rubbed my eyes. Now I am terrified that I am at risk for HIV either from rubbing my eyes or fingering her. There was no penetration sex or oral sex - her or me. Afterwards she wiped me off with a hot towel. What worried me is not only that I may have contracted HIV, but that I can't say no. I have only had unprotected sex twice in a year with a NEG DNA by PCR 6 months ago. I love me girlfriend and I cannot believe that I did this to her (and me).
I am crushed and terrified. Do I need to retest DNA by PCR in 7 days? Or am I simply an emotional basket case.

I know that there are similar questions out there, but it seems to me that there is a mental aspect to all this that I possibly need to attend to. THANKS

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.

This was a zero risk event.  First, HIV is not transmitted by fingering, kissing, etc -- only by unprotected intercourse, i.e. a penis without a condom inside another person's vagina, rectum, or (rarely) mouth.  Second, it is statistically very unlikely your massage partner had HIV -- probably no higher than 1 chance in a thousand, maybe as high as 1% (1 in 100), tops.

So I advise both you and your partner to not worry about HIV.  Don't confuse HIV risk with anxiety over a regretted sexual event.  You and your girlfriend will need to deal with that aspect, but you don't even need HIV testing on account of this event, and you and your partner can safely continue unprotected sex with no risk to her.

Finally, I would encourage you to seek professional psychological care.  Whenever someone suspects this would be a good idea ("a mental health aspect...that I possibly need to attend to"), s/he is almost always right.

I hope this has been helpful.  Best wishes--  HHH, MD

[nnnnn12345]

Thank you  very much.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Thanks for the thanks.  Glad to have helped.

[scardecat]

Doctor Hunter, I neglected to thank you for replying to my question up at the top. You helped me calm down and look at this thing with a level head. Thank you again.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Regardless of foreskin trauma, the chance you caught HIV remains zero or close to it.  As discussed above, it is statistically unlikely your partner had HIV, and even if she did, bite wounds rarely if ever transmit HIV.  (It's one of those theoretical risks that has few if any known cases that it ever happened.)

You don't have to wait all that long for definitive HIV testing.  See http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/1704700

[nnnnn12345]

The bad is....
My penis has a trauma by her tooth during the oral and i just find it after 1 day..

And it's too dark to see the mouth of the woman.

So i'm very worried. I have to wait several weeks to test.......

[nnnnn12345]

"or (rarely) mouth"...oh, that's scared...

Doctor, if i have a trauma on forceskin during a unprotected oral sex, is it risk of HIV?

thanks.