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Avatar universal

I thought I was ready to move on - Oraquick question and new mistake/risk

Hi Dr,

Earlier this month I literally posted every 'risk' I have ever had (until my most recent below).  Here's a link to the whole thing: http://bit.ly/17NzvBv

To make a long story short, Dr. Hook suggested that I test so I did the next day.  Did the Oraquick test results were negative, however, the Control line was..I wouldn't say faint, but not as prominent as the pictures used as examples.  There was no sign of a line next to the T & I think I even used a flashlight.  I took pictures of the test just for my records & I still can't see any sign of a line by the T.  I do, however, get the terrible thought from time to time that maybe the result was a false negative or maybe the T line was so faint that I missed it or the camera missed it.  Not likely, I know, but I have these thoughts.  I did the test at least a year, nearly two years since my last 'risk'.

Even with the faint C line & the time since last risk, it's my understanding that the test is a conclusive negative.  Can you please confirm?

But it doesn't end there. Last Friday night I went out with a friend drinking. We ended up at girl's house with her friend (status unknown). I was really drunk & can remember fingering the girl & kissing. I checked my right hand in the morning & didn't notice any obvious cuts on my fingers, but I did notice some dried blood likely from the girl.  I had a tiny pin mark nick on the outer of my thumb.

Because the night is fuzzy, the paranoia inside me thinks  that I had unprotected sex too.  I can remember fingering, but can't remember ever having sex or falling asleep for that matter.  I woke up fully clothed, belted buckled, shoes & shirt still on. I don't remember ever taking them off.  I even txted the girl asking if we had sex since I couldn't remember that night very well & she replied "LOL. No we didn't have sex".  But she also never mentioned the fingering, so maybe she can't remember anything? Maybe she's lying?
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Avatar universal
Hi Dr.

Understood.  I went ahead and posted in the community forum as well.  I hope you don't mind.  Not because I don't value or trust your advice, I most certainly do, but felt maybe hearing from another peer or someone who had a similar situation could help.

Thanks again.
Helpful - 0
300980 tn?1194929400
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Final answer. Nothing about your rash, nor the exposure you describe is in anyway suggestive of HIV.  Your worries are not justified, at all.

I will have nothng more to say.  EWH
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Avatar universal
Hi Dr. Hook,

Thank you very much for the reply.  Yes, I did have a negative test and yes I had a question about it's conclusiveness earlier, but my current worries about symptoms are more related to my last 'risk' incident which took place after my last negative test.  It was the fingering episode mentioned earlier in this thread.

You did address it and explained masturbation does not put me at risk which is encouraging, but the fact that I have these red/pink dots/spots on my stomach area and chest keep overpowering your words.  The whiteness from my tongue also fuels my worries. I keep replaying the night in my head thinking that I might have had sex in addition to the masturbation. even though I can't remember having sex and the partner said we didn't as well.  All I can remember is the fingering.

It's just that I keep thinking something must be causing this rash/red/pink spots and I think the worst.  Or maybe I've had this 'rash' before the last episode and I'm just noticing it now.  I don't know.  I even dated a few spots and they lasted for about 2/3 days.  However, new spots then appear.  As I mentioned earlier, I began noticing this 'rash' back on 9/18 (4/5 days after possible exposure) and I'm still noticing it today.  At times, it appears my stomach and chest begin to clear up, but then the spots/red dots appear again. And there was one night where it was really noticeable and did look like a rash.

I guess my goal of the last post was to find out that if I did have a valid risk, would the rash I described even make sense?

Thank you, Dr. Hook.
Helpful - 0
300980 tn?1194929400
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Do you really think by repeating your question the answer will change?  That is not the case, even withthe additonal detail. further, you have a negative test and when test results and symptoms are in disagreement, the test is always the correct answer.  You need to move on.  If you think and additonal test would help, you could do that but I am confident that the test will, again be negative if you do re-test.  If that does not work, then I agree, you need to seek counseling.   EWH
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Avatar universal
Hi Dr,

I don't mean to sound pushy (honest), but I haven't received a reply yet and I'm really struggling here.  Have I met my posting limit?
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Avatar universal
Hi Dr. Hook,

I don't mean to waste your time - I'm still struggling with this.  I tried to take your advice and relax and at times I feel like I can get over this and move on, but I can't escape these 'symptoms' and they cause me to breakdown every time I notice them.

The rash I mentioned nearly a month ago became really noticeable last Saturday evening. Fairly red spots/dots on stomach and chest area.  At that point, I really thought it was a rash. Mainly concentrated where you would find a man's chest hair, Haven't noticed anything like it on back or sides of my body.  It appeared to fade away over sun/mon or it at least wasn't as noticeable.  

Now it appears to be coming back.  I have about 13 red/pink spots/dots about the size of a pencil eraser circumference (a few smaller) in the same areas.

If I began noticing this 'rash' back on 9/18 (4/5 days after possible exposure) and I'm still noticing it today (10/16) with the pink/red spots/dots coming and going in different areas, would that even make sense?

And then I think "maybe the rash I had 4/5 days after exposure is separate from what I'm experiencing now even tho they have the same characteristics."

Is an ars rash more consistent?  Does the rash and spots come and go at the same time? Or do spots/dots come and go at different times?

I haven't had a high fever since the exposure (99.6 at the highest) and have had some cases of diarrhea. No sore throat. Overall, I've felt ok, just stressed and maybe a short cold at one point.

The tongue whiteness also hasn't changed from the first time I posted about it.

It's my tongue and this rash that's fueling my worries. Can stress, especially the stress I'm going through over this cause rashes or symptoms like this?

Another thing that's fueling my worries is that it's as if a day doesn't go by without me seeing some reference of hiv. For example, I work at a walk-in clinic and people call in inquiring about std/hiv testing.  I rarely use facebook and the same day I overhear about the std testing, I read a story about someone placing hiv infected needless on gas station handles (can't confirm if the story is true or not).  I have friends that make jokes about aids which is terrible.  I even had a coworker randomly tell a story about when he was stuck by a needle using me as the example for the possible infected person.  I can go on and on. My 'symptoms' combined with these daily references or signs make we feel like it might mean something and cannot be pure coincidences.

I've been terrified of hiv for as long as I can remember.  Even before having a single sexual encounter.  Maybe I need counseling or mental help?

Thanks again.
Helpful - 0
300980 tn?1194929400
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
You are over reacting and this is making what symptosm you have for other reasons become more noticible. The rash of the ARS does not come and go in the manner you describe and you do not have the accompanying signs and symptoms.  Please try to relax. EWH
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Avatar universal
The only thing helping me keep some sanity is that I haven't developed a fever yet.  But I fear if for whatever reason I do, I might breakdown and lose it.  Symptoms are irrelevant unless accompanied by a fever, correct?  As I mentioned in the post before, I have had one episode of diarrhea, and a couple light night sweats.  I really think it's the stress causing that.  The back of my neck is also swore, but I think that's due to my sleeping/having my neck turned at my desk all day.

Please tell me I'm overreacting here.  I try to tell myself that I am, but after searching for symptoms and googling tongue photos, I'm worried sick

Thank you.
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Avatar universal
Hi Dr.Hook,

I took you advice & started to move forward & around the same time of your reply, the so called rash I reference looked like it was starting to go away.
But here I am back again.  The 'rash' in question looks like it came back last weekend, but after looking at it again today, it looks like it might be going away.  Would an ARS behave this way?  If I wasn't so stressed, normally I probably wouldn't even notice it.  Is an ARS rash really obvious?  When I look at what I have, I think, 'Well, it could be a rash, but maybe they're just random light red spots that pop up from time to time'.  Never have I thought, 'Yep, that's definitely a rash'.

The light red spots have the circumference of a pencil eraser, but a bit smaller.  Maybe 3 or 4 in below of where the sternum ends & 3 or 4 an inch or so outside of my belly button area.  Some days it seem worst/more obvious than others.  Some spots go away or almost go away.  I also have some red spots by my nippes/breast area & have caught myself itching them from time to time.

I think this 'rash' started a couple days after the episode I had and has lingered around since.  It's been about 11 days since the episode - is that too early for an ARS to even start?  I haven't found similar spots anywhere on my body.

This 'rash' has also caused me to start searching for symptoms.  I've been checking my mouth & tongue.  My  tongue is a little white on top more white towards back & from the research I've gathered, it's very likely that the white is a combination between overgrown papillae and bacteria.  I bought a tongue brush which helps, but all of the white cannot be removed.  It's as if it's apart of my tongues anatomy/flesh.  I also have a little white on the sides of my tongue.  It looks like a layer of skin, but after googIing photos, I'm scared to death thinking it's OHL.  I couldn't have OHL this early, could I?  I can't remember if it has always been this way.  I want to say it has since I can remember my tongue always getting stained after drinking something like a blue Gatorade or snow cone.  The same type of stained appeared today when I was drinking a blue gatorade.

Helpful - 0
300980 tn?1194929400
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Welcome back to the Forum.  You are being a bit paranoid here.  The test you took was reliable.  If you saw a control line and not a test line, the test was negative.  Intensity is irrelevant.

As far as your more recent episode, you don't think you had sex, can find no evidence that you had sex and were told by the possible partner that you did not have sex.  You did not have sex- don't be paranoid.  Further, masturbation of a partner does not place you at any risk for HIV, even if you had a small puncture wound on your finger and she was menstruating.  Your recent symptoms are not a manifestation of HIV.

time for you to relax and move forward. EWH
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Avatar universal
Last night I had an episode of diarrhea, night sweats & a possible rash on my chest & abs - a few light red/pink circled shape dots about the size of an eraser head. No fever.  Could this be caused from the extreme stress I'm putting on myself? What is your take on these 'symptoms'?

I'm freaking out about two things - The Oraquick test not being conclusive & the recent fingering episode & unprotected sex that I can't remember having.  Is this the anxiety taking control again?  Should I put myself through the misery of testing again or can I just move on with my life & try being normal again?

I feel so ashamed, disgusted & can't believe I would put myself at risk after the misery I thought I was nearly done with.

I am male, 26, white, heterosexual and live in California.  Female is my age, white and lives in CA.

Thanks again, Doctor.
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