scared and stressed! please help a hypochondriac!

[mustnot]

I'm 19 yrs old w 3 partners. in June I had 5 min unprotected sex while on my period with an 18 yr old id been fooling w for 2 yrs. Hes had ~9 partners, no known use of needles, but hes addicted to pills. 3 1/2 weeks later I moved into a dorm and then got sick with a sore throat, swollen glands, night sweats and malaise(no fever). 3 days later I got diarrhea and also a little patch of petechiae between my hard and soft palate. I felt I had HIV and I felt like I kept getting sicker over the next few days(more night sweats, fatigue, no appetite)(stress?) Everything went away after a week except the diarrhea which lasted another month.I was stressed during this time and had a panic attack. A new environment and school didnt help either. I also got RINGWORM around this time.When I thought all was ok, in mid-Aug I got a blotchy red dotted rash that started on my wrists but that would disappear and relocate itself somewhere else like my arms and armpit area, then my lower stomach and upper thighs, then a little bit on my ankles.This lasted about 3 days. Then I got a new b/f who was later diagnosed with Leukemia. He just got a stem cell transplant. We had unprotected sex before his diagnosis and during his treatment, and he got tested for STDs and HIV-all came back neg. The transplant is over and hes now prone to ANY infection.The last time we had sex was the 3rd of Jan.Well he got hospitalized for getting a febrile illness with headache, back pains, photophobia, diarrhea, vomiting, and thrush. They diagnosed it as viral meningitis which is common after a SCT. But then I started thinking-wait we had sex 3 wks ago what if its ARS? and now ive been freaking out thinking that the meningitis is due to ARS(I read on the web that ARS may cause viral meningits)They couldnt find the virus that caused it and they don't test for ARS in transplant patients(i dont think). Now i think i got him infected which would surely kill him bc he has NO immune system.Can u tell me what you think?

[Edward W Hook, MD]

Time for you to get over your fear of testing.  Getting testing will not change whether you are infected or not.  Odds are enormous that your test will be negative and think of the relief that will provide you.  On the other hand, if by some quirk, you turned out to be infected, you could do something about it.  Either way, you could move forward positively and not be spending the emotional energy that you're spending worrying about this.   Get the test- it will be negative.  EWH

[mustnot]

Thanks for the info. i'm really trying to get the guts to get tested. i just always think about what a coincidence it was that i got sick after 3 weeks and my BF too. the diarrhea and rash right after also kills me. the fact that i got diarrhea a few days after getting sick..... it scares me. i've never had diarrhea like that before, let alone for a month. i would literally go like 8 times a day, after everything i ate. i even pooped in my pants a little one day :) haha oh well. and i felt like it was a sickness i've never experienced before, but maybe i was just so stressed out at the time that it made me sicker... can that happen? and can a new and stressful environment cause different illnesses? that guy that i had sex with, i know most of his partners, and some of them are pretty "nasty". it really worries me!

[Edward W Hook, MD]

1.  Certainly not for HIV.  There are a number of disorders associated with chronic diarrhea and GI problems.  I would suggest working with an internist on them.  
2.  The rash does not sound HIV related.  Churning emotions however can casue such problems.  A dermatologist perhaps?
3.  The ARS is due to the presence of the HIV virus in the circulation mixing with the antibodies and other mechanisms the body takes to fight infection.  Neither you nor your BF have ARS so this is for information only.
4.  He didn't and in fact, with a poor immune system for the reasons noted above, ARS would be, if anything, less likely to occur in him than others.
EWH

[mustnot]

and also, that guy i had sex with used snorted, especially roxecettes which is like synthetic heroin. i don't believe he would inject but who knows? if he snorted synthetic heroin i don't see what would stop him from shooting up the real thing. aye aye aye

[mustnot]

Thank you. and i know i am getting out of proportion, but i feel that all my stress is vented through hypochondria. it's a difficult thing to control and i've acted like this ever since i was a child. anxiety leads to irrational thoughts. my boyfriend getting leukemia has been really hard, and i guess i don't know how to cope. and all my weird "symptoms" didnt help with my anxiety either. i've been on the edge ever since i first got sick. that was 7 months ago! chronic stress=not good for health. but i have a couple questions.
1. do you find the month long diarrhea suspicious? what could have caused it? (maybe the move to a new town?)
2. and that rash..... does it sound like anything you have seen before?
3. i would also like to know what exactly causes the ARS illness?
4. and finally, since my boyfriend has no immune system whatsoever, would ARS have affected him more severely if he DID get it? (he is at home 24/7, he can't even go into public places for up to a year. even a minor sickness puts him in the hospital just for monitoring. the viral meningitis gave him a fever ranging 99-101.7, i feel that it would have been much higher had it actually been ARS)

sorry to nag and ask so many questions, i've just had no one to ask for all these months, so i greatly appreciate your time!

[Edward W Hook, MD]

I think you are getting carried away.  The litany of symptoms you describe lasted far too long to be ARS and, as we have said literally hundreds of times on this site, there has yet to be a person who has come to this site complaining of symptoms who has turned out to have HIV or the ARS.  The exposures you describe are low risk (pills do not give you HIV) and I am sure that you did not give your BF HIV three weeks ago!.  In my opinion, you do not need testing or to worry.  Realizing that that may well be insufficient to quell your fears, go get one HIV test.  then when the result comes back negative, forget about this and move forward.  EWH