Aa
Thinline's woes coninue
The saga of ill health continues and I’m at my wits end. Truly I don’t know how much more I can take. Things are getting on top of me. Thanks to all of you who have supported me, tsco your post meant a great deal to me. All of you give me courage.
My latest is that I had that dreadful abscess on my bum/lower back removed under general anaesthetic on Friday and came out of hospital on Saturday. They couldn’t stitch the wound due to the infection, so it looks like I have a big yawning mouth on my bum. Since then I have just not been feeling well. My heart keeps skipping beats, it just feels a bit funny. Now my ankles and feet have swollen up again. During my hospital stay the swelling was horrific and my feet looked like a surgical glove blown up. It was revolting. Now it has started up again and I don’t know why since I’m no longer on cortisone and I weaned off it very slowly.
Yesterday I went to the Rheumatologist and he was not at all happy with me. He changed my meds altogether and told me he wanted me back on cortisone due to the severity of my back pain from the reactive arthritis flare up. I don’t want to be on cortisone any longer, the side effects are too severe after such a long time. Soon it will affect my bones and I have enough problems without getting osteoporosis at the age of 36.
After seeing the Rheumatologist I went straight to the Pulmonogist about my feet – he says absolutely NO MORE cortisone. I think he wants to run away every time he sets eyes on me, I know his partner really does run away when he spots me – he does an about turn the instant he sees me and runs into a private room or the men’s room. It makes me laugh – although it is a bit pathetic.
The pulmonogist has no idea what is causing the oedema and feels that looking for the cause is more trouble than its worth especially because he did a huge bunch of blood tests which show that my kidney function is normal which would have been his big worry (kidney problems are a complication of diabetes) so he’s put me on Lasix for a few weeks.
The worst of it all is that when they grew out the culture from the abscess it was full of Salmonella! I nearly feel off the chair when he told me that. I’ve been on both IV and oral antibiotics for about four weeks to make sure the salmonella was all gone, I only had one week to go on the Cipro, but now it looks like the salmonella is still sneaking about in my body – alive and kicking – so I have to continue on the Cipro indefinitely.
I am so frustrated. Even work things are going wrong. They made an office for me downstairs at work because I cannot walk up stairs (I can hardly walk at all), while my computer was being checked at its new network point, the hard drive crashed. I could not believe it when they told me. They sent it to some “expert” who apparently retrieves data from dead hard drives. I’m glad I wasn’t there when it happened because I went through a patch when I seemed to kill anything electronic. Three hard drives, a few pairs of car indicators, palm pilots – for some reason I would go near them and that would be the end of them. It got to the point that I phoned Medtronic to find out if my pacemaker could be causing it. They said impossible. It stopped happening after a while but was really bizarre.
So here I am totally down in the dumps and don’t know how to get back on track again. I’m off to the pain specialist on Thursday and then back to the surgeon on Friday. Meanwhile I’m getting further and further behind with my work and I’m starting to really stress about it. My little boy goes back to school tomorrow so I’ll be going in to the office for the first time since the end of October.
To be honest I’m dreading going back. I look horrendous, my hair is so thin, my “moon face” is so huge and red, my second chin looks like a vast sausage roll, I weigh 22lbs more than I did in October (thanks to cortisone and water retention), my feet and ankles look like balloons, I have a full set of luggage under my eyes, with very attractive raccoon like rings underneath. I’m really not a vain person but even I’m feeling very down about how I look and then when people tell me how well I’m looking I want to slap them. Rather say nothing than say something so ridiculously untrue. Do they think I don’t look in the mirror?
To top all of this off I keep crying. I never knew I had this many tears hiding in me. They keep trying to escape at the most inopportune moments, most particularly when someone is being especially nice to me.
So that’s the little “I feel so sorry for myself” session, nobody else to tell how I feel so thanks for listening.
My latest is that I had that dreadful abscess on my bum/lower back removed under general anaesthetic on Friday and came out of hospital on Saturday. They couldn’t stitch the wound due to the infection, so it looks like I have a big yawning mouth on my bum. Since then I have just not been feeling well. My heart keeps skipping beats, it just feels a bit funny. Now my ankles and feet have swollen up again. During my hospital stay the swelling was horrific and my feet looked like a surgical glove blown up. It was revolting. Now it has started up again and I don’t know why since I’m no longer on cortisone and I weaned off it very slowly.
Yesterday I went to the Rheumatologist and he was not at all happy with me. He changed my meds altogether and told me he wanted me back on cortisone due to the severity of my back pain from the reactive arthritis flare up. I don’t want to be on cortisone any longer, the side effects are too severe after such a long time. Soon it will affect my bones and I have enough problems without getting osteoporosis at the age of 36.
After seeing the Rheumatologist I went straight to the Pulmonogist about my feet – he says absolutely NO MORE cortisone. I think he wants to run away every time he sets eyes on me, I know his partner really does run away when he spots me – he does an about turn the instant he sees me and runs into a private room or the men’s room. It makes me laugh – although it is a bit pathetic.
The pulmonogist has no idea what is causing the oedema and feels that looking for the cause is more trouble than its worth especially because he did a huge bunch of blood tests which show that my kidney function is normal which would have been his big worry (kidney problems are a complication of diabetes) so he’s put me on Lasix for a few weeks.
The worst of it all is that when they grew out the culture from the abscess it was full of Salmonella! I nearly feel off the chair when he told me that. I’ve been on both IV and oral antibiotics for about four weeks to make sure the salmonella was all gone, I only had one week to go on the Cipro, but now it looks like the salmonella is still sneaking about in my body – alive and kicking – so I have to continue on the Cipro indefinitely.
I am so frustrated. Even work things are going wrong. They made an office for me downstairs at work because I cannot walk up stairs (I can hardly walk at all), while my computer was being checked at its new network point, the hard drive crashed. I could not believe it when they told me. They sent it to some “expert” who apparently retrieves data from dead hard drives. I’m glad I wasn’t there when it happened because I went through a patch when I seemed to kill anything electronic. Three hard drives, a few pairs of car indicators, palm pilots – for some reason I would go near them and that would be the end of them. It got to the point that I phoned Medtronic to find out if my pacemaker could be causing it. They said impossible. It stopped happening after a while but was really bizarre.
So here I am totally down in the dumps and don’t know how to get back on track again. I’m off to the pain specialist on Thursday and then back to the surgeon on Friday. Meanwhile I’m getting further and further behind with my work and I’m starting to really stress about it. My little boy goes back to school tomorrow so I’ll be going in to the office for the first time since the end of October.
To be honest I’m dreading going back. I look horrendous, my hair is so thin, my “moon face” is so huge and red, my second chin looks like a vast sausage roll, I weigh 22lbs more than I did in October (thanks to cortisone and water retention), my feet and ankles look like balloons, I have a full set of luggage under my eyes, with very attractive raccoon like rings underneath. I’m really not a vain person but even I’m feeling very down about how I look and then when people tell me how well I’m looking I want to slap them. Rather say nothing than say something so ridiculously untrue. Do they think I don’t look in the mirror?
To top all of this off I keep crying. I never knew I had this many tears hiding in me. They keep trying to escape at the most inopportune moments, most particularly when someone is being especially nice to me.
So that’s the little “I feel so sorry for myself” session, nobody else to tell how I feel so thanks for listening.
I'm so sad to hear of your continued suffering. You'll get through this. Love and peace,
acjviolin
acjviolin
hey there hon, sooooo sorry to hear about all this!!!!!!
i just wanted to say, may god give you strength and i pray this year you get totally better!!!!!!! may 2008 be great!!!!
big hugs
maria
i just wanted to say, may god give you strength and i pray this year you get totally better!!!!!!! may 2008 be great!!!!
big hugs
maria
Hi, I am sooooo sorry you are having even more problems, its just not fair for 1 person to go through so much.Please try and be strong we are all praying for you so you WILL get through it all, be strong for your family, I am sure they are being strong for you, it must be so difficult for you all.
My thoughts are with you all, hugs and kisses
My thoughts are with you all, hugs and kisses
Pika: thanks for the hugs, I need them badly today, I don't feel strong at all. Went to work for a short while and some people did not even recognise me due to the swelling of my face and my hair loss. It made me feel awful.
Acjviolin: thank you, please do pray for me, I need all the help I can get at the moment - G_d seems to have deserted me lately and I have not even been able to phone my Rabbi, I know I should, but I'm really struggling with this issue lately. Maybe I'll give him a call tomorrow.
tsco: thanks for the support. The salmonella has spread around my entire body and keeps popping up in different places. It hides away in a dormant state and then whacks me again. The docs don't understand how it can still be alive in my body after I've been on Ciprobay for a month already and it should be dead by now - feels like it might outlive me in all honesty. I suspect they are going to have to take my pacemaker leads out and put new ones in. I know this is a major issue and I can't bear to think about it.
Acjviolin: thank you, please do pray for me, I need all the help I can get at the moment - G_d seems to have deserted me lately and I have not even been able to phone my Rabbi, I know I should, but I'm really struggling with this issue lately. Maybe I'll give him a call tomorrow.
tsco: thanks for the support. The salmonella has spread around my entire body and keeps popping up in different places. It hides away in a dormant state and then whacks me again. The docs don't understand how it can still be alive in my body after I've been on Ciprobay for a month already and it should be dead by now - feels like it might outlive me in all honesty. I suspect they are going to have to take my pacemaker leads out and put new ones in. I know this is a major issue and I can't bear to think about it.
Hope you are getting better soon. I can feel the pain as you had..... Other than that, I would like to send you a heap of hugs, hugs, hugs. Be strong.... Be tuff..... Take care.
Bless you. You are an incredibly strong person, evidently. I'll pray especially for you tonight- God knows who Thinline is!...you are his child, after all. Take tsco's advice and keep on keeping on, gal! Know that you are never alone when you are in the minds and hearts of others, and you are, Thinline.
Hey kid keep with it. I'd say with the infection you are feeling pretty crappy! I've had salmonella and it in itself makes you so sick you want to croak! It is making you feel really bad. As it subsides your spirit will change. Keep with it. I think of you.
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