I have been working with my daughter on behavioral and emotional issues since she was 3 yrs old. Before this time developmentally she was advanced. (crawling (4 months), standing (6 months), walking (7months), talking - one words 6 1/2 months- sentences by 10 months), potty trained (1 1/2 yrs). Behavior wise she was great and would ask a lot of questions. at times a little demanding but nothing more then the average child at the age of 2.
It was a month before her 3rd birthday she fell down the 4 cement steps. She broke the small bones in the back of her nose and had a big welt on her right forehead. (i was at work when this happened. Her father put her down for a nap with out taking her to the ER) when I returned home to find her face extremely swollen and black eyes I took her the ER. they did not do a brain scan. The ER dr only looked into her nose and eyes. (only thing he said was her nose could effect her breathing when she got older.)
2 months later..... her behavior changed. she became rude, extremely aggressive (tipping over tables to trying to stab the cat with a fork), lying, fits of tantrums which far beyond what I had seen before. She started to display sexualized behavior and swearing. Not small words.. She dropped the "F" bomb in fits of rage. Very forgetful, can't remember what she did for the day or when I ask her to repeat something, she can not. she does not interrupt correctly what is said. she is impulsive, obsessive at times and will over react to something small. She can not make connections to her own behavior but if she is playing with my niece or nephew and they do something wrong she will give them a time out. She now is manipulative, steals, deceitful and malicious. Some of her behavior is a normal 12 yr old (independent- and trying to find her acceptance) yet some behavior is like she is still stuck in being 3yrs old (tantrums and childlike behavior). But I am worried because malicious behavior is new and so calculated and sneaky and will do it with out any ounce of emotion on her face.
Over the course of 9 yrs 1,2,3 magic, I have done time outs in a quiet room, rewards for good behavior, taking things away; earning things back, giving 2 choices a few minutes to decide which she will choose, positive feed back (you did a great job calming down or wow great job how does that make you feel?), explain punishment for behavior, if she refuses to do something and she is watching tv I will turn it off and let her know she can watch it when she is finished with what I asked her to do. Now she refuses to go to her room and will walk out of the house. She is too strong for me to take her to her room and she often will strike out at me (punching, kicking, slapping, pinching...)
Maybe I am fetching here but I cant help but think her behavior is connected to her fall. All diagnoses were made with out knowing the behavior change from when she fell (I had not shared this because I forgot about it till I read her baby book for a pych project I had). There is mental illness that runs in the family on her fathers side. Her diagnosis has been anything from ADD to Bipolar and ODD, anxiety and depression with possible PDD. Yet its speculation- symptoms. Medications do not work. the only medication that seemed to allow her to express when she was over whelmed was for ADD, but when it was switched to the time release it no longer worked. Antidepressants add to her aggression which has ended in her being hospitalized 2 times (2 months to a yr)
Am I reaching to ask her Dr to do a Spect scan on her? I have read some amazing things about the scans which can produce pictures of the brain which shows area that are over or under active. Also TBI or ADD (ring of fire) I feel like if they can get a look at her brain then they could understand which areas are preventing her to make the connections so therapy and correct medication can be introduced to help focus on tools that have been given and being worked on now with her. . Rather then over medicating of symptoms...
(8 yrs of therapy has not made difference- I think some improvements are through maturity but her behavior stays the same when in a fit of rage- sometimes its over fast sometimes it lasts for hrs) tools are given in therapy but she just is not making the connection when in the rage. After its over and we talk about what happened (that is the best time to talk with her, either she just let out of the things building up or she is to tired to argue from having a fit of rage. I will ask if she thinks she could have used her words. She would say Yes, like I am angry or frustrated. But when she is in that rage she just can not use any tools she has been taught.
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