Your boyfriends Gay obsession is a very common theme. Most people with the Pure O type of OCD which is what he has can obsess about anything but the most popular themes are fear of being gay, fear that they might become a murderer or harm someone they love, and the fear of going insane. He is the farthest thing from becoming gay.He is accualy is terrified of the idea which gives him anxiety. This anxiety is causing him to search for answers to these thoughts and to try to prove to himself that he is not gay by fighting the thoughts. Its too bad but this wont work. He can be cured from this with hard work doing CBT therapy with exposures. Here is the Drs web site who cured me of this disorder. The drugs are fine but without learning the skills to defeat it on his own it will always be a problem for him. www.ocdonline.com read some of his articles on the site on how this is treated.
Darling,
I take the same thing your boyfriend does. It might be different for me because I'm female, but I have the same affects that he does. First of all, if he is gay, it is not because of you! Secondly, he's got to figure that out for himself, you can't do it for him. Thirdly, be patient. Do not approach him about it. When he is ready to bare his greatest fears to you, he will. And I would suggest that you all not get married till he does so. You have to be willing to bare your soul to him too. I beg you please do not rush into marriage. Yes it can be wonderful, but it gets harder and harder in today's world to survive marriage. Please try to use wisdom while making your choices. Sincerely, Molyba