OCD...About POCD,HOCD and a fear/obession about ghosts...

[boywonder1234]

ive ALWAYS being anxious and had alot of anxiety...and always paranoid,example in school if i saw someone laughing and they happened to look at me id think theyre talking about me and id get paranoid soo much..ive also had past obsessions such as 'scared of aliens upducting me' which went away through the years etc!

now my ocd kicked off again..i was in college and my friends were talking about "how do uno whether your gay or not" and my mind said "your gay" and "how do uno ur not gay" WHICH scared the hell out off me...and then from there my hocd started! since then things got tough handling ocd..i couldnt wear certain clothes because i thought they were GAY etc etc...

then my other ocd was "a fear of going crazy" whcih was soo bad,basically i feared i was hearing things and thought i was going mad,this ocd sort of cleared off....because i just ignored everythng and my mind goot bored ahah!

but my ocds always switch! so when i ignore my hocd my mind then switches to pocd...then wen i get bored of that my mind will...u get the drift.

so anyways im bak to pocd which is the worst ocd EVER because i love kids and find them adorable but DO NOT find them attractive in anyway! but my mind is saying i do...and its discusting! id rather be dead than be a p**do.so anyway my ocd mind is replaying this memory,basically when i was in school (2 years ago) i found a girl 4 years younger than me quite attractive (but im unsure whether i did,my ocd mind always tampers with my memories alot) and im wondering...p**dos like KIDS right...so would i,finding a girl 4 years yougner than me would that make me a peedo...??? i mean i think it wouldnt because shes only 4 years younger than me? funny thing is if i showed u a picture of her she looks round about 14/15 years old...and if i asked my friends alot of them would say shes attractive haha! (but i dont actually remeber me finding her attractive :()

the only thing i remeber is that she was quite pretty :/

ino guys which are like 24 which find 15/16 year olds quite attractive etc :(

so anyways does that make me a peedo :( i no it doesnt but my ocd mind wont shutup!

i dont fancy kids,or find them attractive in anyway! it sickens me even hearing about peedos on tv news etc.i always found it weird how peedos can find kids attractive?

my pocd started when i thought this little kid was cute and adorable...i mean does it make me a peedo if i find kids cute?! i find dogs cute..does that mean i fancy dogs ahahha! this ocd is the worst,id rather be GAY (which is my worst fear) than be a peedo :(

so yeahh...

(funny thing is ill forget this spike in a weeks time aahha)

ino im not a peedo! but my mind wont shutup..

[boywonder1234]

Hahah! Noo I didn't...because I no I can beat ocd...I sort of beat it last nigh...then another thought can in which sort of "hurt" more...with my ocd it just takes ignoring...and I did it with my other ocds..but this 1 seems a lot harder...bu ino I can defeat it! :)

[JGF25]

Uh oh...still battling I see...did you see somebody?