P.S I just realised your name is Hannah too! Yay us and our cool name!
Be kind to yourself!
I used to think by watching lesbian porn it made me a lesbian! It’s easy to overthink things! Meditate, breathe and research psychology it helps with these things.
Best of luck :)
Please, you need to chill the **** out. You aren’t going to hell for any of that, hell and heaven are just ways to scare you into doing good although you don’t need religion to do good. If god punished you for that then he is a wanker. That aside..
Fantasising is different to reality that’s why it is a fantasy. Being the teacher or student in this situation is no better then the other. It is a fantasy and so it is not real!
It is easy to really freak out and feel like you are gross or not a normal human if you get turned on by something taboo or something out of the norm. But unless it is harming anyone or really immorally wrong (child pornography etc) then please be less hard on yourself. People need to think more about the psychology behind why they are doing something or enjoying something.
Eg. Watching and enjoying role-play rape pornography does not mean you actually think rape in real life is acceptable behaviour. It is most likely simply a fantasy you enjoy because it is appealing sleeping with someone you don’t know and that person having their way with you. The rapist most often has control over the person too so maybe you like the idea of being controlled or feeling powerless.
All very common.
Also each to their own but if religion makes you feel guilty about enjoying life or makes you hate yourself then I don’t see the benefit of that.
Hope that helps! Good luck!