Professor said something about HOCD?

[melmel4ever]

Hello,
Today my Professor told me that she has never heard of HOCD, I tried to explain it to her, but she looked at me like I was crazy or something. And people began to laugh including her, at the fact that I tried to tell them this, I mean I laughed at it as well. But then after class I got in my car and I was..."OMG she's a professional psychologist/ professor, and she doesn't know what HOCD is and never heard of it, and that must mean I'm gay? I started to cry... But then I realize something, I was like "wait? My professor doesn't even know me personally, and that not everyone knows everything in the psychology field, ...doesn't mean that HOCD doesn't exist, then I'm okay?"  My psychiatrist said that she doesn't believe that I'm gay at all, it's just my OCD thoughts. I feel actually okay about this, and I know I'm not gay, but the thoughts just sometimes do pop up, but I can handle them now better with therapy/meds/ and from psychiatrist who confirmed that I wasn't at all. What do you think of this? Specifically my professor?

[melmel4ever]

Thanks,
Your probably right, it was just weird trying to explain this to her and that it's true and I read many articles about it. I felt kind of just giving up on everything because every time I say something I feel like an idiot haha. Yeah it kind of hurt when people were laughing, if only they KNEW what it's like to have OCD maybe then they wouldn't have laughed. And I'm doing much better and haven't really gone through thinking about the "gay" thoughts thank god for the meds, I'm getting there slowly but surely lol. Thank you so very much!

[JGF25]

If you were to look in the DSM IV regarding HOCD you are unlikely to find it.  I believe it is termed "sexual orientation" OCD.  So more than likely your professor was just going by the book so to speak.  The people that laugh are laughing because this is absurd to them, they know nothing about what it is like to live with OCD, but you and I both know that for people that suffer from OCD it is very real AND very common.  Hang in there.  You know you are not gay deep down inside.  Stop your mind from going there.  Breathe, redirect your thoughts, meditate...anything to stop yourself from going there.