Sorry that I didn't read your entire post...just kinda skimmed over it. I agree with the previous poster. Your doc may be nice and it sounds like you like him. But, the inflammation, pain, and your other issues like shifting, popping, and clunking...seems a bit concerning.
Your doctor seems dismissive to me. Not everyone recovers and heals according to the textbook. And how many 46 year-olds want to wear a brace for the rest of their lives? It's a quality of life issue and it sounds as if yours has been greatly diminished. Seek out a second opinion and a more compassionate orthopedic surgeon. Go to your primary care physician and get a referral. Explain to him/her why and which orthopedist he/she recommends. Good luck!!
This orthopod is not listening. He believes you should have one kind of recovery -- this isn't happening and he doesn't know how to deal with it. He blames you for being a "sweller." What an absurd suggestion. Inflammation indicates that all is not well in your knee replacements. Begin looking for another ortho.
Whether or not you "should" have pain, the fact remains that you have it and it needs treatment. Work with your PCP to find a compassionate pain doctor who may offer alternative treatments or pain care until the cause of your knee pain is understood.
Best wishes.
Sorry that you are having so much pain. Traumatic orthopedic injuries and surgeries are always painful. I remember the pain I had with my injury. Thought that my emergency surgery would take care of the pain. Unfortunately, it took at least six to nine months to get off the pain meds. I began weaning myself off of them after four months and used Lortab on a PRN basis only after about six months. Trust me, it will get better. If it doesn't, seek out another orthopedist.