I am not sure that FMLA is the same everywhere. I work in a hospital and had to take FMLA time to care for my mother in NC.Itis my understanding that FMLA is NOT paid. In other words, in my case, I took the balance of my vacation time, then applied for FMLA - it just insures that you keep your job - that you won't be reprimanded or fired for taking extra time off. Also, you do not accrue any vacation time or disability time when you are off on FMLA. Perhaps if your doctor understood that you have no other child care, and that your husband was not getting paid to take time off his job, he would be more understanding.....
It sounds to me like you need a sit down with your doc and explain the situation. I don't know anything about the papers but I would sure get on his case a bit for not supporting you on this.
This is ridiculous; this dr of yours seems to be lacking in compassion; what is his problem?
I am not certain I would want to do business with this ..."control freak".
After I read your post, I Googled "Family Leave Act" and did lots of reading; seems question #8;a, and 8;b on your form asks about the assistance you will require, and the psychological comfort he would provide to you. Clearly you would benefit from his being there with you.
I just don't get it; who is this guy to tell you, or your husband, that you do not need your husband's loving support and reassurances? Sometimes just his touch, or, the sound of his voice brings calm; I just cannot get over this.
Don't you dare let him get by with this; your husband must not let this guy keep him from you....You guys need eachother right now...you need to be together.
If you speak with your dr, and he continues to refuse to sign; is there anyone else in his office that might sign? If not, then I would think your husband's employer might relate with more compassion about the need for your husband to take some Family Leave Time (without pay, of course).
Hey, you certainly have enough on your mind without this. Good luck in all your battles; keep that chin up, and somehow, find Peace. You can do this; especially with the help of your DH and the love of your two year old.
Peace to you and your DH and family. dian
Tonya,
You know I'm not sure that the dr CAN refuse to sign those papers, if you are truly having the surgery(and we and your dr both know you are), and your husband having reason to be there, which he does. FMLA is issued by the government, it's listed on the US Dept of Labor website. Here's a little bit of what it says, which I'm sure you already know:
Covered employers MUST grant an eligible employee up to a total of 12 workweeks of unpaid leave during any 12-month period for one or more of the following reasons:
* for the birth and care of the newborn child of the employee;
* for placement with the employee of a son or daughter for adoption or foster care;
* to CARE for an immediate family member (SPOUSE, child, or parent) with a serious health condition; or
* to take medical leave when the employee is unable to work because of a serious health condition.
It's not up to the dr to approve or deny FMLA, only to sign verifying that you ARE having the surgery your husband has told his employer about. Then it's up to the employer to approve or deny it as FMLA leave time. Seems the dr needs a refresher course in FMLA rights. Your husband has every right to take the time off to care for you, and your children, when you will not be able to do so yourself. I would fight this one, and call the Dept of Labor if you need to, to find out what to do in a situation like that. Here's the site: http://www.dol.gov/esa/whd/fmla/
Hope this helps some....Miranda
Thanks ladies..The person who told me this is my Dr's office manager.It is his private practice no other Dr's.She told me that it is not medically nessesary for him to be there.I would only need him to drive me home when I leave.I also told her we have 6 kids.If I can't drive for 2wks.He will have to be there to drive the kids to school.She said she would ask the Dr but she was sure he wouldn't agree to fill them out.We know that it will be unpaid leave but he has vacation time to take so he will still get paid.He did speak with his superviser today and he explained the problem.She said do the best to get those papers but if he couldnt that she would aprrove it and deal with the Dr with the labor board.If I wasnt in such need of this surgery I would get a 2nd opinion..I see dont want to go through that wait and see period again..It is been way to long..But I can say that after this and all the post-op check up's I will find another Dr..Thanks again for all the support
This is by far the most insensitive thing I have ever heard of. Did the dr. tell you this personally or was it one of his staff? If that is the case, I would speak directly to your dr. Some people can be so rude, especially when they do not have the slightest clue of what we are going through. You need your DH with you and to take care of your child. I would call the office or even go there and make the biggest pest of myself until I saw him (well that is just me - but it couldn't hurt!!).
I am with you girl:-)
Tascha
Thanks Tascha,I got for pre-op on Thursday.I will defintly be talking with my Dr.Thanks again
I agree. You should talk with your doctor and explain the situation DIRECTLY to him, and talk about the additional stress you are under by having to worry about all this stuff! I'm sure he doesn't want an unhappy, stressed out patient to operate on!