Aa
scared while waiting
Today my doctor told me I have an irregular pelvic approximately. 7 in with abdominal fluid (ascites). Ultra sound next week then spot with gyn/onc. Everything I have read makes it sound like a death sentance due to the fluid. Also waiting on results of ca 125. Is there still hope for a decent diagnosis and outcome?
It is hard. I feel for you. I called my Primary Care and told her I was scared and she said I would sail through it. It is a major surgery. I got through it but it was hard. Also for me it was a loss of my reproductive organs. I was not going to have kids but I had to mourn anyway.
My best advice is to distract yourself anyway you can. Or if you have someone you can talk to that helps.
I have been through a lot of Surgery and it was not as bad as I imagined it would be.
Be kind to yourself. It helps I will pass good thoughts your way. You are not alone.
Oh and I printed pictures of the horse I ride, my riding buddies, my cats, and dogs, and my husband. I looked at them before surgery and when I got out of surgery. Anything that makes you happy. I had my ipod with music I like to calm me down.
Alex
My best advice is to distract yourself anyway you can. Or if you have someone you can talk to that helps.
I have been through a lot of Surgery and it was not as bad as I imagined it would be.
Be kind to yourself. It helps I will pass good thoughts your way. You are not alone.
Oh and I printed pictures of the horse I ride, my riding buddies, my cats, and dogs, and my husband. I looked at them before surgery and when I got out of surgery. Anything that makes you happy. I had my ipod with music I like to calm me down.
Alex
Tomorrow is my debulking.....I have never been so afraid in my life. I try not to worry but it is not easy.
It is a really hard thing to go through. You have a right to be scared and sad and even angry. My surgeon told me he was taking out cysts. I was not fooled because they told me they were doing a big incision and taking everything including the omentum.
This is a big transition in your life and you have the right to feel however you feel. I am not a crier but I cried a lot in the hospital. I felt so alone.
I am here if you need to talk or feel alone. You can even private message me.
Alex
This is a big transition in your life and you have the right to feel however you feel. I am not a crier but I cried a lot in the hospital. I felt so alone.
I am here if you need to talk or feel alone. You can even private message me.
Alex
Well surgery is scheduled for Wednesday. I know it will probably be malignant so knowing is half the battle....still depressed and scared but it is what it is.
It is pretty scary especially at the beginning. Gynecological Cancer is not the dreaded disease of even five years ago. I have a rare a deadly form of Ovarian Cancer and I am confident I will be around for many years to come. I am in a drug trial for a new class of drug which is changing the ball game. Since I have been in the clinical trial all my tumors have shrunk in half.
PEOPLE ARE NOT STATISTICS. I got on the internet and went to the library and read all kinds of scary statistics. I should be dead according to the internet and books I have read. Those are old statistics and they are just statistics.I know many women who are living with Gynecological Cancer.
The treatments are doable. There is no right or wrong way to get through any of this we all find our own path. It is normal to be afraid.
I had the big surgery and it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I have had a lot of surgeries. My Primary Care said you will get through surgery fine and I did. I mostly had trouble with gas pain afterward.
I am over a year out. I have stage IV. I ride horses, walk, and train dogs. My life is not that much different than it was before surgery. I get tired but also have Multiple Sclerosis. I look younger than I have in years. No one can tell I am in chemo right now or even have Cancer.
My biggest fear was pain. I have a great pain clinic and they have gotten rid of that fear.
I look at Ovarian Cancer as a Chronic Illness like diabetes. I have to treat it but it is doable. Things are changing so fast in Cancer treatment it just simply is not as bad as it was five years ago.
Tell your kids on your terms. You can wait until after surgery until the doctors know better. They can't see inside you so they are making guesses until they can.
I can't do much but I am here and I care.
Alex
PEOPLE ARE NOT STATISTICS. I got on the internet and went to the library and read all kinds of scary statistics. I should be dead according to the internet and books I have read. Those are old statistics and they are just statistics.I know many women who are living with Gynecological Cancer.
The treatments are doable. There is no right or wrong way to get through any of this we all find our own path. It is normal to be afraid.
I had the big surgery and it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I have had a lot of surgeries. My Primary Care said you will get through surgery fine and I did. I mostly had trouble with gas pain afterward.
I am over a year out. I have stage IV. I ride horses, walk, and train dogs. My life is not that much different than it was before surgery. I get tired but also have Multiple Sclerosis. I look younger than I have in years. No one can tell I am in chemo right now or even have Cancer.
My biggest fear was pain. I have a great pain clinic and they have gotten rid of that fear.
I look at Ovarian Cancer as a Chronic Illness like diabetes. I have to treat it but it is doable. Things are changing so fast in Cancer treatment it just simply is not as bad as it was five years ago.
Tell your kids on your terms. You can wait until after surgery until the doctors know better. They can't see inside you so they are making guesses until they can.
I can't do much but I am here and I care.
Alex
Surgery will probably be next week. Due to the elevated ca 125 etc thinks I will need chemo and radiation. Still not sure of the location yet. Gotta figuire out how to tell the kids 30, 19, 13 and 10. I have to fight this and best for them. I don't think I have ever been so terrified in my life.
I am thinking about you. I know you are really scared. That is normal. I have the hardest time with the unknown myself.
Alex
Alex
Many things can cause ca125 to come bck high. Try not to stress about it too much. The only way to be diagnosed with ovca is surgery.
My husband is going with me to Dr. At this moment I just want this all over with. I am trying to keep as positive as possible until I know for sure but it is so easy to believe all of the things on the net. My youngest daughter is 10 and I cant imagine not being here to her. I guess I will know more on Monday.
Do you have someone going with you to the Doctor? It helps to have someone with you. I did not and that was a mistake. Also do not be rushed. If you do not like this doctor, or the clinic get a second opinion. I did not. I was so scared I just did what they told me. My surgeon was not there for me the day of or after the surgery. I was basically in the care of a nurse for three months. It turns out my doctor was in a rock band and busy touring. I did not like him at the first meeting and I should have listened to my gut. The first meeting did not feel right. I ended up changing doctors and hospitals in the middle of chemotherapy. I wish I had checked out different doctors and especially a different hospital before surgery. I was scared and in shock.
Hopefully you will not have Cancer, but if you do this is the team you will be working with. The chemistry has to be right. The facility has to be a place you do not mind spending time. I am at a big hospital and you wait a lot. The care is really good so I do not mind all the waiting. The other place was ten years behind the times. The chemo room was a blocked off hallway with no privacy and I never saw a doctor after surgery. I see a Doctor once a month where I am now. At the other place they just did not care how sick I got from chemo, now they are all over my symptoms. If I had checked out all the local hospitals before hand I would not have chosen the first hospital and definitely not the first doctor.
You have choices. Take the time you need to be comfortable. I went less than a week into surgery because I was so scared I did not know any different. If I had it to do over I would have taken a look at both hospitals and would have chosen the second hospital.
I am here if you need anything this week end.
Alex
Hopefully you will not have Cancer, but if you do this is the team you will be working with. The chemistry has to be right. The facility has to be a place you do not mind spending time. I am at a big hospital and you wait a lot. The care is really good so I do not mind all the waiting. The other place was ten years behind the times. The chemo room was a blocked off hallway with no privacy and I never saw a doctor after surgery. I see a Doctor once a month where I am now. At the other place they just did not care how sick I got from chemo, now they are all over my symptoms. If I had checked out all the local hospitals before hand I would not have chosen the first hospital and definitely not the first doctor.
You have choices. Take the time you need to be comfortable. I went less than a week into surgery because I was so scared I did not know any different. If I had it to do over I would have taken a look at both hospitals and would have chosen the second hospital.
I am here if you need anything this week end.
Alex
Thanks for your response. This is moving so fast. Once called to schedule appetite for Monday. While I am glad my doctor is on top of this I think it is scaring me even more.
Doctors can only make educated guesses unless the actually see inside you. I know you are worried. It may not be the worst case scenario Doctors can't see the Ovaries. Let me assure you that if it were the worst case scenario it is not as bad as you imagined. I have a rare form of Multiple Sclerosis and Stage 4 Ovarian Cancer and I am doing fine. I ride horses, train dogs, and hike. I plan to live a long time. I am in a Clinical Trial for a targeted therapy and it has shrunk my tumors in half. This drug will be on the market soon and it will change the ball game. It is not chemo. There are lots of new drugs out there.
My Grand mother and Aunt died of Ovarian Cancer so I thought I was a goner. They were treated in the 50's and 70's. Things are so much better now. The important information is people are not statistics. We are individuals.
I have had MS since I was 2 years old and Cancer for several years. I was scared to death with both diagnoses until I learned that they were not the end of the world.
My Doctor says I look better than I have in years. Ovarian Cancer is now considered a chronic illness. I have two chronic illnesses MS and Cancer.
Learning to live with both has been a challenge but it is doable. Imagining what a disease is like is worse than what the disease really is. They have done studies to prove it.
Someone last week did not know I have cancer. I was at a MS gathering. They said if you have MS and get Cancer it is a death sentence because of the MS. There is a lot of misinformation out there. There is also old information. In Ovarian Cancer that could be data from six months ago.
I care. I know you are scared. I have been through a lot with my Cancer but I live a happy life.
Alex
My Grand mother and Aunt died of Ovarian Cancer so I thought I was a goner. They were treated in the 50's and 70's. Things are so much better now. The important information is people are not statistics. We are individuals.
I have had MS since I was 2 years old and Cancer for several years. I was scared to death with both diagnoses until I learned that they were not the end of the world.
My Doctor says I look better than I have in years. Ovarian Cancer is now considered a chronic illness. I have two chronic illnesses MS and Cancer.
Learning to live with both has been a challenge but it is doable. Imagining what a disease is like is worse than what the disease really is. They have done studies to prove it.
Someone last week did not know I have cancer. I was at a MS gathering. They said if you have MS and get Cancer it is a death sentence because of the MS. There is a lot of misinformation out there. There is also old information. In Ovarian Cancer that could be data from six months ago.
I care. I know you are scared. I have been through a lot with my Cancer but I live a happy life.
Alex
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