My 8 yr old daughter has masturbated since she was about 3. It began w/ stuffed animals, which ended up all getting thrown away b/c of worry of bacteria and infection. She always does it in her bed at night. She used to be more open a/b and didn't care if members of our immediate family knew, but is now more private about it. She began doing it so much that she complained of pain and itching in her genital area. We took her to the Doctor who gave us a cream to put on it as needed. The masturbation did not slow down in the least at this point, if anything she bagan doing it more. We began to notice stains in her bed, which she ended up telling us was pee. She said she feels like she has to pee afterwards. She's never had a problem with bed-wetting, so we're not sure why she's peeing IN her bed afterwards, b/c she also DOES get up and go to the bathroom afterwards. We finally told her that she needs to stop doing this to herself b/c it is hurting her and she's now peeing in the bed and not informing us, therefore just laying in pee. We didn't have much of any issue with it for many months- that is to say we didn't see any signs that it was continuing. But more recently, she's been staying awake sometimes as much as 2 1/2 hrs past when we say good-nite to her and she's supposed to go to sleep, I guess to masturbate! It is affecting her in school, as she has bags under her eyes and very obviously tired all the time. Last night, she was in bed, lights out at 8pm. We heard her awake at about 10:30, went in to check on her and she said she needed some cream b/c "it itches". When asked if she's been rubbing herself she said no. Then we noticed a huge urine stain (a/b the circumference of a beach ball) dried up, on her fitted sheet. When asked what the heck was on her sheets, she said she peed the bed on Monday night (today is Friday!!). When asked why she didn't tell us she said she doesn't know. She finally admitted that she has been rubbing herself every night (apparently for 2 1/2 hours!).
I should mention that she is being monitored by an endocrinologist for pre-puberty. She's had an odor and hair under her arms since she was 3 1/2 or 4. She's had pubic hair for over a year or so now, and has huge mood swings, oily skin, oily hair after 8 hrs, etc. The initial hormone testing (a/b 8 months ago) indicated that she was normal. She's due to go to him again- she's going to go every 6 months until she starts her period.
Our questions are:
1.Is it normal that she's doing it every single night and for such a long period of time?
2. Is it possible that she is reaching a climax and that's why it takes so long?
3. Why is she peeing the bed, and hiding and lying about it?
4. None of this seems at all normal to us- it's affecting her health both physically ane mentally. Is this normal?
5. While I don't agree that she should be made to feel ashamed about doing this, I do want to figure out a way to get her to not do it as much and to realize that it's not OK to pee the bed afterwards and just lay in it for days on end. Any advice on how to get that point across?
We're taking her to the doctor today to have her examined in her genital region and treat the horrible rash and itching that she has. We're also looking into her seeing a psychologist.