Child's inappropriate sexual behavior

[Buggirl66502]

My husband walked by my 7 year old stepson's room the other day, where my SS was supposed to be taking a nap with his friend, and instead saw the friend lying on the bed and my SS was sitting up under the covers, leaning over him.  My husband asked what they were doing and they scrambled around and said "nothing", but my husband noticed my SS's friend's pants were unbuttoned.  My husband took my SS out of the room and told him to "keep your hands to yourself".  Since we weren't sure exactly what had happened and neither boy would say anything, we called the friend's mom and told her what we observed, and also spoke to my SS about inappropriate touching.

The next day, the other child's mom called me and told me that her son told her my SS had "touched my penis".  When we confronted my SS, he denied everything but when we told him we knew what happened, my SS finally told us "I licked his penis".

My husband are in total shock and don't know what to do.  Is this normal experimentation in 7 year olds, or does this indicate something much more troubling?  We asked my SS if he had ever done it before and he said "yes".  We asked him if anyone else had ever done it to him and he said "no".  He acts very nervous when we question him and it is obvious to us that he is not telling us the whole story.

My SS lives with us and visits his mom on weekends and we are concerned that something might have happened to him over there.  There is not much parental supervision at the other household.  He just came home from a month-long summer visitation with his mom and his half-brother.  His older half-brother (almost 14 years old) has developmental/behavioral problems (failing school, has been arrested for breaking and entering and vandalism) and my SS often goes off and plays with his older brother and his brother's friends.  

What do we do?

[Tb49663]

Way to make him feel like a deviant.

Of course he felt uncomfortable talking to you. Wouldn't you be uncomfortable if your mom or dad asked you if you've ever licked a penis?  I don't care how old you are.  That's not a comfortable situation to be in.

No amount of control you try to assert on the situation will prevent a determined kid from doing what they want to do. They'll find a way to do it anyway.

And for Pete's sake put his door back on his room. You're a parent, not a jailer.

[Buggirl66502]

Thank you for your comments.  His door has been removed from his room for sometime now (we repainted his room) and he and his friend were actually doing this "activity" in his room anyway, out in the open, just under the covers.  This made us think they really didn't think they were doing anything wrong.  My SS has now been limited to playing video games etc. with his friends in the living room, where we will always have an eye on him.  He is not allowed to take his friends back to play in his room anymore.  He is not happy about it, but we told him these are the consequences for doing things you are not supposed to do.  We explained to him that it is fine to touch your own private areas when you are alone, but you NEVER touch anyone else.

[Jessx3]

My almost seven year old son has been having some weird sexual behavior lately.  He is rubbing his penis on furniture and things and I will catch him with his hand down his pants once in a while.  I am not sure how to deal with something like this.  I have asked the advice of family, but get mixed reviews.  My mother in law tells me that there is something wrong with him, or something must have happened to him or he has seen this behavior before.  Other members of the family seem to think that touching himself is just a form of self discovery for a boy his age.  I am confused and worried.  I am not sure what to do.  l have regulated his time with other children for fear of what might become of the situation.  I have heard of things like that happening between children of their age group before.  Hopefully it is just a phase.  Maybe it is just a self discovery phase and he was wondering if other boys his age felt the same sensations he did while touching those areas.  Well, good luck to you.  I hope there is an end to this behavior soon.  Just remember to monitor him closely and don't allow closed doors with other children until there is an end to his behavior.  We took his door off of his bedroom just to be certain.