My 9 yr old son won't sleep in his bed. Help!

[Frustration911]

My 9yr old goes to sleep in his own bed ok (as long as he knows that my husband or I are still up) He consistently runs into our room at his first moment of awakening. This has been ongoing for the past 4 years. I always had been instructed by others with older children that " don't worry they won't be in your bed when they are 16" I'm staring to second think that advice.   Over the past week my husband and I are on board with putting an end to this behavior and getting our bed back. He literally carries on for 2 plus hours at night. We are trying to be consistent and quietly walk him back to his bedroom, assure his safety and leave. Within seconds he's back up saying he can't sleep. And it goes on and on and on. We have a 10  yr old daughter who has never had any of these issues which makes this even more difficult. We have taken privileges away( all day with no kindle, no play dates, bribery, etc) nothing is working and I'm completely exhausted as well as the entire household. I will say he is remorseful and says that he will try harder but when it comes to get back to sleep in his own bed its a war.  He make requests that we stay out in our living room while he attempts to fall back to sleep but continuously comes out to check if we are there and look out if we even try to sneak back to bed and sleep.... He has always been the strong willed child and has taken this title to a higher level. I'm not sure what else to do while trying to build his self esteem & confidence. Any suggestions would be grateful.

[aishaish]

is it true that lefties children are genius

[MarkLakewood3367]

This behavior sounds like excessive anxiety, not misbehavior.  Disciplining this behavior would be counterproductive.  You need to get to the root of the anxiety.  You stated that this anxiety began 4 years ago, when he was 5.  Did something occur at the age of 5 that could have caused such anxiety and insecurity?  I think that the best thing to do at this point is to discuss this situation with your son's school counselor or an independent mental health professional.  Unless you find out why your son is experiencing this anxiety, this behavior will continue.  Again, it is important that you only discipline your son for misbehavior, not behavior driven by anxiety as this will negatively affect your relationship.