Our Teenager is obsessed with "going out" with a boy at age 13

My husband is losing his mind because his 13 year old daughter is "going out" with a boy.  It's like this boyfriend thing happened over night and now that she is going with him it is all she talks about.  She would be on facebook all night long if we would let her.  We just started a new rule that she can only be on  facebook for an hour.  She didn't like that at all.  Are we being unreasonable?  she told us this boy wants to spend 40 dollars on her for valentine's day.  Seems like a lot to spend on someone when this has been going on for not even a week.  What I am afraid of is how she will be if there is a breakup.  She knows her Dad hates hearing about this boy, but she doesn't care and continues to talk about it.  Can he tell her not to bring the subject up or can he say you have 15 minutes to talk about him and thats it and if she doesn't stick to it there will be consequences?  We don't know what to do. Help

[AnnieBrooke]

He could look actively bored when she goes on and on about the boy, or leave the room.  If she wants to be with Dad, she can figure out that she needs to switch her topic of conversation.

You're afraid of how she will be if there is a breakup?  There's going to be one, sooner or later, and it's probably better for her to have her first few in the bosom of the family who loves her, than when she is 21 and out on her own.  Just try to keep her within reasonable bounds on her newfound enthusiasm before she bores everyone to death with her panegyrics about the kid.

[RockRose]

I'm a little curious about your husband's reaction to the boyfriend.

I've certainly seen parents who don't allow their kids to have "boyfriends" until they are a certain age,  say 16,  but to try to set up rules about how long she can talk about him in the presence of her dad seems kind of  odd to me.

Why is he so bothered by this?   If he doesn't believe the relationship is appropriate and she should not be in a relationship like this,  that's one thing - but to be "driven insane" because she is talking about him kind of strikes me as a concern.

[AnnieBrooke]

Also, I'd be less worried about your daughter if she talks all the time about Kid Wonderful than if she stops telling you about him.  At least she wants to include you in what she's thinking and doing.  Better than the opposite.

[ku111]

I have an almost 13 yr old boy and many come over to the house.  Oh gosh, they talk about the girls all the time and the girls call and etc...  I always remind them that they are only 13 and relationships at this age rarely last.  I do not allow "dates" of any kind except for school dances.  My 18 yr old had to wait and so will this one.  When he talks about a girl I am glad.  I want to know what's going on and never want to shut it out.  I am thankful they come to me.  Some parents never hear a word and they are very quiet.  Now that is concerning.  I always use it as an opportunity to listen and advise.  I will say, "she sounds really nice and I hope that is a quality you will look for when you are out of college and ready to meet someone".  I also say you know these relationships change from day to day so don't be suprised if it changes.  Try and always stay friends but I am happy you have a new friend that is cute and equally smart.  This is a kid thing and "going out" is what they say.  "going out"?  Going where?lol!  Oh well...  I am glad she feels comfortable to include you (annoying...yep!lol!) but better than keeping secrets.  Good job!  You guys have done a great job.  Keep it going.

[overopiates]

Thats normal so get used to it lol.like said above b happy she is talking.Dad is probably bothered cause this is his little girl and the boy thing came out of nowhere.also yes there will b many break ups,over dramatic and tears its part of being a teenager.This is her first boyfriend she is excited.As long as her grades r up,she is happy and appropriate I wouldnt sweat it.