What to do with 16 yr old daughter rebelling since meeting her boyfriend.
My daughter has been dating her boyfriend for about 7 months now. I've personally never had a problem with the kid however I know he smokes marijuana, skips school and has been arrested for domestic abuse on the parents. Now there is more to that story as I believe the parents are part of that problem...long story. He's dealing with all kind of court and counseling issues now with his family. One night after the arrest, his dad told him to find another place to stay. I didn't want the kid on the street so he stayed in my home but 3 days later hadn't even heard from his parent. His dad finally texted him and they texted each other for a couple of days, dad never saying come home or anything. (the stepmom didn't want the boy there but the dad didn't want to leave the stepmom). The boy's grandma out of state hired him an attorney for the court case. The dad found out and texted the kid that he had court papers for him to sign. Next thing I knew, a deputy was banging on my door and told me the dad had filed a missing child's report. I tried to tell the dad that the dad had thrown him out. But they didn't care. That night the kid went home with the dad and was then locked out of his own home and made to sleep outside. Problem is now I couldn't help him since I could be arrested for harboring him at my home. My daughter wouldn't speak to me because I wouldn't let him move in with us and now won't let him come into the home. I hadn't told her she couldnt see him but he just couldn't be at my home. Everything seemed okay until this past week. I was sitting next to my mom at the hospital who had just been taken off of life support when I get a call from a deputy who has my daughter. Well, turns out that she was at the boy's house and either the boy or both of them were smoking pot when his dad came home. So he called the police. My daughter has always claimed to be against pot smoking and premarital sex and is still professing these things, however, now my trust in her is gone. I've told her she cannot see the boy anymore. I realize that people say that makes them want the person more but how do I allow her to see the kid when she keeps getting into trouble because of him. I've spoken to him and her numerous times telling him that he shouldn't smoke especially seeing as the courts will be testing him. I came home one afternoon and he had smoked in my daughter's room thinking it was okay as long as they blew it out the window. I said that is unacceptable. My daughter was told not to go to his home which she did anyway. I have been allowing her to do online schooling this year but now I'm realizing that it was just a way she could spend time with him during the day. Meanwhile, she's always behind in her classes. My family and her dad(my exhusband) say she needs to be put back into physical school so she's not at home alone and that she does not need to be seeing this kid.
Help! Any advice? I've always been close to my daughter and she's actually always been more honest than I would like her to be about some things. I was always glad. But I also have to be her parent whether she hates me for it or not. AM I DOING THE RIGHT THING?
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