Parenting Toddlers (1-5) Community
4 year old sexual behavior
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4 year old sexual behavior

I have s 4 year old and this is the first time that I seen this behavior in my son, he was in his room with all lights out and T.V off so I figured I would go in there and check on him, I turned the light on and he had his underwear and paints off rubbing himself standing up, I asked him what he was doing and he told me that he was tired and that he was mad at me for catching him that it was big and it felt good, but he seemed embarrassed. I am seriously wondering if this is normal or not for a 4 year old to be straight forward like that with his mother. I told him that if he was going to do that to keep it private in his bedroom, I really am lost for words on that type of answer from a 4 year old. So is this normal?
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I think that is normal - most kids use self pleasure as a relaxing tool to try and fall asleep - i often catch my 4 year old laying on his tummy rumming himself on the bed, and this is in his sleep, my doctor tole me once that kids use it to slef sooth.
I think it is a good think not to make it an ugly thing in their eyes, as it is a natural thing for every human. I read that is good to teach them to do it in the privacy of their own room, but also teach them that no one else is to offer or do it for them. My son and i often have the conversation of who is NOT allowed to touch him on his willy, and that he is also not allowed to touch anybody else, even if they ask. He needs to understand that plasure is a private thing only to be done alone, as you dont want someone to take advantage of it.

Im sure it is embarassing for him to be caught, because they are also not too sure if this is allowed or not. Dont make a big fuss of it, the bigger fus we as parents make, the more important it becomes to kids, and you dont want something like this to become important.

My son eventually stopped touching himself in public, because i told him that it is ok to do it, but he must not let anybody see him and go to his room. Now i see he hardley does it anymore, because i did not put a big focus on it....

Good luck...
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